Joy, with a side of Chaos.

Guess who's here...

2012-01-10T13:08:00.000-08:00

Yes, I know. I haven't blogged in - like - eons. And here's why:

This is the part where I say to everyone "oh, I'll do better from here on out, I'll blog daily again, really, I will. It's my new-years resolution in fact... yada yada yada" except I'm not going to because I'm more of a realist than anything these days. I know as well as you all do that there is even LESS of a chance that I will blog now, than there was that I would blog whilst pregnant.

Whew. That was cathartic. Now onto cuter things.

Cora Grace Kathleen Hnosko was Born on Tuesday, December 20th at 10:46am - a full ten days before her due date (halleluia!) She weighed 6lbs 14oz, and measured 19.5" long..She is everything her brother was NOT as a newborn. She sleeps almost all day (and as a result is up a lot at night, but not in the screaming angry baby way, more of a "I'm awake and happy" way. It's cute) and is content to sit in a swing, or a bouncy seat and observe the view. It shocks me really. If you knew Levi as a newborn, it would shock you too. She sleeps A TON!

In case you are interested in this sort of thing (and because I really should type it out before I forget it) Here's Cora's abbreviated birth story:

On the morning of Monday the 19th, something was different. I can't put it into words, but something was in the air - enough so that I called my friend Rachael, who was on "babywatch" to take Levi off our hands if we needed to make a dash to the hospital, and Joyce, my doula, to give them a heads-up. It wasn't until around 5pm that contractions started. I say "contractions" but in my opinion they were really just strong braxton hicks. They were wimpy to say the very least. I went to bed that night and tried to sleep them off.

I awoke around 1am and couldn't get back to sleep - not because the contractions hurt, but because they were annoying, and had moved closer together (about 3 minutes apart). I called my support team (Midwife, Doula, Rachael) and in a couple hours time we were on our way to the hospital at my midwife's request.

I was a mere 3 centimeters dilated. Hardly anything to be excited about. I was blessed with a delightful labor and delivery nurse (Jane) who also happens to be a midwife. She totally left me alone, which is exactly what I wanted. For the next three hours I paced and paced and paced. At this point my baby girl was ROP (Right occiput posterior) also known as mostly-sunny-side-up. NOT a comfortable position to deliver in. I knew the more I moved around, the better chance I had that she'd move into an Anterior position, but nothing was a sure bet. So, I mixed it up a little spending some of my time on my feet, and some on my hands and knees, hoping gravity would shift this baby around.

Somewhere in there I lost track of time. Tunnel vision came upon me and I wasn't speaking in sentences any longer. Remembering how long and arduous Levi's labor and delivery were I kept reminding myself that I had a lot longer to go, and that the pain still had much worse to get. This was only the small stuff, I had to keep it together because the worst is yet to come.

It must have been sometime around 10am when my water broke. That was something I never felt with Levi (I had an epidural around 9 cm and they broke my water just before he came out) and man, was it a weird sensation. At that point labor became intensely difficult. I struggled to focus. My midwife came to see how I was doing and, because I requested not to be "checked", she estimated I was around 6cm dilated based on where I was initially, how much time had passed, etc. She left the room to go check on another patient.

I was exhausted. I laid down on the bed for the first time that day. It was likely no longer than 10 minutes after my midwife left that I felt Cora turn from Posterior to Anterior (HOORAY!) and immediately my whole core began to push her out. I felt almost like a fly on the wall as my body did all the work for me. It was supernatural. I simply don't have the words to describe how relieving it felt to push through all that pain. Strange, I know, but that really was the best part of labor although I had feared it would be the worst.

Now, mind you, my midwife was down the hall. Levi, my firstborn was out in 30 minutes, so I knew this would be quick. my midwife scurried back into the room, and threw on her gloves (no time for her gown) and with two pushes Cora was out!

She didn't cry. She was rather blue. So after a quick sit on my chest, off she went. Turned out that with her quick arrival she hadn't coughed up all the junk that had accumulated in her lungs over the past 9 months. Not only that, but she had a belly FULL of meconium (poop). Needless to say, she was in the nursery under observation for low O2 saturation for the better part of 3 hours. It was heartbreaking to see her lying there and not be able to snuggle and nurse her, but by the grace of God she came out of it and returned with us to our room.

All in all, this was a fantastic birth experience for me - everything Levi's birth wasn't. It was healing. My recovery was 100% faster, and my post partum mental state an even keel. Nursing has also been completely unproblematic, and absolutely wonderful. Praise be to the LORD! Many of you know the trouble Levi and I had with nursing, and let me tell you, every baby is different, and boy am I glad.

And I'll have to leave it at that as I have not one, but two little ones who should soon be waking. Check facebook for more adorable pictures!

about to pop...

2011-11-14T12:22:00.001-08:00

...or so it feels, and yet there are still six weeks and change left before this little one is due.

This is my little basketball at 34 weeks, just as round and directly in front of me as Levi ever was. If I showed you a picture of me from head on, (especially in this black shirt) you may not know I'm even pregnant, but a profile view makes it plenty obvious!

Remember this post, and this photo? Now there's a trip down memory lane, less than three short years ago.. I feel like I'm carrying exactly the same way this time as last, although (thankfully) not gaining as much weight this time. Something about chasing around a 2 1/2 year old all day long doesn't exactly lend itself to eating leisurely meals.

2 1/2, that's right.Just a short two weeks until my firstborn is half way to five - I can hardly believe it. He's jumped SO many milestones during my pregnancy, it's hard to keep track of them all. I'd say the most delightful of those milestones has occurred most recently: his ability, and desire, to "pretend" play all by himself. All of the sudden his toys talk to one another, and I'll find him sitting in his room having conversations. Not surprisingly, most of those conversations revolve around similar conversations he and I have had, so frequently I think he's talking to me. But no, it's his tractor and dump truck who, through him, are discussing what is appropriate and inappropriate. occasionally the offending toy gets a time out. and then a hug and a kiss. It's perfectly adorable.

Although even I find it a poor excuse, my blogging life has taken a complete nose dive during this pregnancy as I have slept on every possible occasion. My delightful Levi takes a solid 90 minute nap (longer if I'm lucky) and I try my hardest to sleep as well. Often these days, sleep alludes me (both daytime and nighttime) due mostly to my complete inability to maintain a comfortable position. But ah, such is pregnancy. I am daily grateful for not one but TWO chiropractors who keep me and my misaligned pelvis ambulatory.

Jonathan is, just this week, making his last two batches of cheese for the year - I'm so very glad he'll get a break from early mornings and long days here soon. Lately we've both been sick sick sick with some nasty upper-respiratory virus (mine was confirmed today to have morphed into a sinus infection - oh joy) and since we've both been coughing and sputtering so much we've split off into different rooms of the house for sleep. While I'll admit that the extra bed space is nice, it's rather disconcerting to wake up alone in bed. Needless to say, I'm anxious for us all to be well.

I'm pretty sure that's all there is to update everyone on. Except, of course, to remind myself and anyone who may be reading that we continue to feel unreasonably blessed by the Lord's provision and blessing over our lives. We feel so unworthy, and yet so grateful. The ails of pregnancy pale in comparison to the blessing of a new life, and although I may complain from time to time about this or that, we really are astonished that the Lord provides and blesses us in the ways that He has.

Baby's still due Dec. 30th, but if you see me in January and I'm still pregnant, don't be surprised. :)

NOT ME Friday

2011-08-26T12:33:00.000-07:00

I keep missing Monday, so here it goes

I did NOT plug in the George Foreman grill instead of the coffee pot in my half-asleep stooper. The smell of heating metal and old hamburger grease which filled me home did not then make me sick.

I did NOT literally break a sweat putting on compression stockings this morning. I also did not wear said stockings with shorts, unabashadly. No, truly a fashion no-no. And you won't find me re-adjusting these blasted things ALL DAY LONG. Not ME! Although, to be fair, it also wasn't me who decided to go one morning without said blasted stockings only to discover that I was FAR more cofortable with them ON, than with them OFF. (I am not wondering how on EARTH I'll manage to don these things with a watermelon in my abdomen, a cantaloupe gives me enough challange)

I am NOT thoroughly and completely enjoying owning a smartphone - an object I told a number of people I may never own. I'm also not texting, or using swype to do it. and I'm certainly not learning a SWATH of new things every day, making me feel more and more like someone who was completely out of touch with technology.

I am NOT at all surprised that we're having a girl. No, in fact I think I planned it that way. Would you believe I've spent Months on end thinking this would be a girl, and collecting all sorts of pink and frilly things? Indeed, I am Not at all taking a VERY LONG time to let this fact settle in, and to fully understand what it means. No, it's all come very quickly and naturally.

I do NOT save blogging for the end of nap time every day then then allow it to surprise me that I don't have enough time to do it. That would be silly. Truly.

words.

2011-08-17T12:40:00.000-07:00

I have very little to say, but I am feeling the guilt that comes along with waiting FAR too long to blog. So, here are some phrases and words that should bring you up to date:

It's a girl - or at least it will be. No wait, it IS, and it WILL be, but she's still baking. We'll wait to name her until she arrives around the new year.
I'm still sick. Dang. Hoped morning sickness would find its end but alas, it continues, although in a much, much weaker form than it took on a few months ago.
We're switching to Sprint (but we haven't yet so if you can think of any really compelling reasons why we should stay with AT&T, please speak up) We've had the same plan for 8 years (maybe 9, actually) and it's time to make a few changes.
I'm wearing compression stockings. Don't know what those are hmm? consider yourself lucky. My two pregnancy bellies have placed themselves only (and I mean ONLY) directly in front of me, which puts extra pressure on the veins running down my legs, and thus, I find myself in compression stockings. I could explain further, but really, those are probably all the details you need.
I don't think my daughter and I will have the same affinity for chocolate. Poor girl. I haven't been able to stomach it for months (hopefully my mother-in-law will still call us family)
I battled the teensy kitchen ants - and won. Thank you Terro.
I set fire to our oven - Jonathan and his trusty fire extinguisher won. My pizza stone lost.
we may be re-roofing before winter. Not sure yet though.
We may be getting a new (to us) car. Not sure yet though. (no rush there)

There's a quick and messy update. I posted dozens of pictures from throughout our summer on my facebook page - pictures of the county fair, Levi's birthday party, our trip to the Omaha zoo, and many others that had been sitting on my camera for far too long- hope you have a moment to check them out. I've tried a few times to upload them here, but blogger is giving me grief over that and I suspect I need to update my version of Chrome before uploading them will be successful. We shall see.

Oddly disconcerting

2011-07-25T11:28:00.000-07:00

Do you ever...

Feel like you're

Being watched?

Furniture Hokey Pokey 2011

2011-07-24T13:02:00.000-07:00

When we moved into this house everything we owned fit (easily) into a medium sized u-haul. Come to think of it, when we moved to the state of Nebraska, everything we owned fit into a small u-haul. How times change when you buy a house and have a baby. Sitting in Levi's room the other day I realized that there was only ONE thing in that entire room that we owned before moving to Nebraska and it was the crappy old dresser we curb-picked back in pullman, and shared for our first three years of marriage (yes mom, I still have it, I don't have the heart to toss it out).

Fast forward to 2011 and yes, we have a LOT more stuff - especially furniture - all of which has been found used or gifted to us. So when we set out to move Levi to his twin bed (the pieces of which were all sourced from different craigslist folks over the past 6 months) it meant moving his crib and changing table out to make room. Of course to do that, we had to have space in the new baby's room across the hall which was filled with a guest bed and various other guest-room items. Hmm... Thus began the great furniture hokey pokey of 2011.

We began in the basement office. Rearranging the space was some help, moving my sewing table to the utility/laundry room provided the remainder of the space necessary to move the majority of the guest room downstairs. With the guest room reasonably empty we then had room for the changing table and crib, and (whew) you can guess what we did next...

That's right, we finally fulfilled our ultimate goal of setting up Levi's new twin bed, complete with "Thomas" sheet and pillowcase. The boy couldn't have been more excited.

After a completely anti-climactic first night and nap in said bed, he has been walking around proudly all day proclaiming "I sleep in a bed" to anyone who will listen. It's priceless.

So in the past 90 days my son has weaned, potty trained, and upgraded to a twin bed. and I'm quite sure that's enough change for ME, for now anyway. :)

recent conversations

2011-07-22T12:39:00.000-07:00

me: "Levi, what are we going to do when we get home?"

Levi: "shoes off, pants off" (shortly followed by) "lunch, milk-cup, nap"

(all true, and in order, by the way!)

me: "Levi, what did you learn about at VBS today?"

Levi "JESUS!"

me: "who made the bunnies (part of a song they sing)

Levi: "JESUS!"

me: "who took you to the potty at VBS today?"

Levi: "JESUS!"

(unfair, but so cute!)

in the car...

me: "Levi, it's time to be all done whining and crying, please use your words."

Levi: "NO, MORE!"

me: "more whining and crying?"

Levi: (continues said unreasonable whining and fussing)

me: "Levi, all done whining, we're almost home"

Levi: "MORE!!"

me: "Levi, is mommy having a boy or a girl?"

Levi: "no, a baby"

me: "yes sweetie, but will it be a baby boy or a baby girl?"

Levi: "a bunny"

Me: "Levi, what does mommy want you to do if you wake up while you're still supposed to be resting?

Levi: "not stand up"

I realize that needs a little context: Lately I've been reminding him that if he wakes up in the middle of the night, he needs to roll over and go back to sleep. Apparently he also remembers something ELSE I told him to do - or rather NOT to do - a few nights back when he awoke in the middle of the night and I found him standing up in his crib (not such a safe feat for a very very tall toddler). He's been thoroughly obedient though, I must say.

naptime is over - more later

potty progress and the FULL week ahead

2011-07-18T12:05:00.000-07:00

Well, since I last blogged we've come a looooooooong way (or maybe just what seems like a long way) in the potty department. Levi has started (gasp) telling us when he needs to go - sometimes even when we're out and about.

Last week he spent an afternoon at daycare with a friend (while I went to my 16 week pre-natal, and got a much-needed haircut) and stayed dry all afternoon. This came much to my surprise because I thought surely he'd have an accident the moment I left him someplace without a potty out in plain sight. Apparently not so. Away from home he's been doing a phenomenal job of using the big toilet (with a toddler seat on top) and doing so for people other than his folks no less.

This past Sunday I took a deep breath and sent him to Sunday school in underpants and returned (again surprised) to find him dry. This week he'll be at VBS every morning and so far, with one day down, things are looking high and dry!

I would be remiss if I didn't mention a few lessons I've learned in the past week or so. First, I should never (ever) again give my son a cup of anything, even boring water, to sip on in the car. This is ESPECIALLY true if we're in someone else's car :) and even more true when that special someone else has a DVD player going. Three accidents into our garage saling expedition, I learned my lesson. To the toddler's credit, he did tell me he had to go - but it was not in time for me to remove him from his seat and place him on the potty. He's really been a champ though.

Our full week, which began today with VBS, will continue with a cheesemaking week for Jonathan. Pre-dawn mornings and late nights will punctuate his schedule - and if you have a spouse that works long hours you know what kind of a stressful effect that can have on family life. But I am fully aware that, for many families, long irregular hours are the norm. I am so grateful that is not the case for our family, and that my hard-working husband ordinarily has a very regular schedule that allows him to be home with us for dinner. This week may seem very long indeed, but at least it's only this week (and the week after next, and about 9 more of them before Christmas comes, but who's counting?)

I tried my darndest to post some adorable pictures on my blog the other day but blogger has been fighting with me tooth and nail. Instead I posted them on facebook, so hopefully you can enjoy them there. My effort to take pictures of our family happenings has been pitaful as of late, and I'm sorry to say we've missed photographing a few recent events including a delightful working farm/school we visited this past weekend. Levi adored the horses they had there, as well as the chickens, and ducks, and the one skiddish peacock. He's forever curious - and now talking a blue streak about his curiousities - occasionally in full sentences, which never ceases to amaze me.

If you don't live in the Midwest, now is not the best time to visit (although arguably better than, say, mid January). We're experiencing a daily heat index of 115 - which is mostly tolerable inside my air conditioned home. In my basement. Jokes aside though, I do love this hot weather. It keeps me going during the dark freeze of winter.

I'll have more to say later in the week when I have my thoughts together. Jonathan and I are reading a very interesting book together that I need to blog about. It's written by a skeptic, that's all I'll say for now. Adios!

for those of you who've been there

2011-07-07T11:21:00.000-07:00

I have some potty training questions. First, here's where we're at:

When we're at home Levi goes bottomless. He decides when he needs to go potty. He sits down, and does his business. When he's done, he gets up. It's simple really.

When we're out I take him to the potty ever hour. He usually goes. If we happen to be between errands, I take his potty seat in the car and let him empty his bladder in the back of our subaru somewhere in the parking lot. He likes this set up, I don't mind it.

But...

I'd rather not drag the potty chair around. Added to that is the fact that I'd like him to be comfortable going potty on a regular toilet - currently, he is not happy to do so, even when there's a toddler seat on said toilet. He will, however, hold it until he can make it to a more "Levi approved" potty chair. The rub in all this is that I'm volunteering at VBS in a couple weeks, and Levi will be taken to the potty by someone other than his mom or dad, to sit on a real toilet with a toddler seat.

My concern is 2-fold. First, since we've only been doing this two weeks, he's used to being bottomless and having his potty at his immediate disposal right smack dab in the middle of the living room. Not so at VBS. Second, when we do have to use a potty elsewhere, he's used to mom and dad taking him. He simply would not produce anything for the loving nursery worker who tried to take him last Sunday (but peed a river 5 minutes later in his potty in the back of our car once church was over). Hmm...

Suggestions?

Oh, and the whole pants thing... how do I teach him to pull his pants down? That's a toughie.

A long awaited update

2011-07-05T11:58:00.001-07:00

There is so much that has gone on in the past - oh - four+ months that it may take me a week of continuous blogging to recall all of it. Seriously, a veritable mountain of change in our lives. I'm lucky, however, that you may know a lot of it if we keep up with each other on facebook. If that's the case, nothing here will shock you, but will rather just fill in the blanks.

I'll add pictures at a later date as my camera is conveniently at a friend's house, in the depths of the diaper bag I left there this morning. Shame on mommy.

Ok, first things first. we're expecting again*! Our joy overflows! (It occurs to me that feelings and exclamations cannot properly or adequately be transmitted over the bloggosphere, but you get my sentiment).

*once a day I get a chance to blog. that time happens to coincide with the once a day that my toddler sleeps, which also happens to be the time I was also taking a much needed nap. Every. Day. Therein lies my non-blogging excuse.

We're due around the New Year, and we'll find out what we're having in mid-August. Although I am into my second trimester I am still sick-sick-sick. In my pregnancy with Levi my morning (ahem, ALL DAY) sickness was totally gone by now, but as they say, "every pregnancy is different" right? I remain reasonably hopeful my poor ailing stomach will even it's keel soon. If not I guess our eating-out bill will grow and grow as I simply can't stomach cooking ANYTHING that makes my house smell like ANYTHING at all. Truly.

There are so very many more things I could say about this pregnancy (especially because we conceived so very soon, and so very much to our surprise, after our March loss) but I'll leave most of that for future posts. Suffice to say I'm certainly reserved, although excited; I'm paranoid, but peaceful; I'm afraid, but also very sure that this pregnancy (like the two which preceded it) belongs fully to my Heavenly Father who makes no mistakes, and does not act on whims. Amen.

Levi turned 2 on May 28th, Hooray! Grandma Jen came for the celebration which consisted of a dual party for he and his best pal Teague in our back yard - complete with sprinkler running and the blow-up pool. Loads of fun for any 2-year old. Levi reveled in the gifts he was generously given, including the delightful tool-bench I found at goodwill a few months back. He's our little builder now and the saying holds true "to the toddler with a hammer, the whole world's a nail"

Not two weeks later Levi weaned - I was 10 weeks pregnant at that point, and more than willing to be DONE nursing. Nursing hurts when you happen to be pregnant, a fact I did not fully understand until I was in the middle of it. So, one evening (Levi was only nursing once a day, just before bed) I suggested to Levi that we snuggle instead of having "milk time" and he agreed. Wow, I really expected that to be a bone of contention, but apparently he was as ready as I was.

Soon after (or was it before - I'm losing track) I embarked upon jam-splosion-2011. You may remember my 2010 edition? Well, I created 42 sticky pints of delicious strawberry jam for just under $60, a feat I'm more than proud of - especially considering how sick I felt whilste making said jam. And it turned out great, just ask my friend Kim, who bought a few jars for her family to enjoy. Although my jam extravaganza was just as messy this year as it was last year, I spread it out over a week instead of doing it all in two days. MUCH BETTER OPTION. Just sayin'.

I'm sure there are more things that have happend between all that stuff and this, but Levi decided almost two weeks ago to be all done with diapers. Friends, I will be completely honest with you and admit I used to scoff at parents who attempted to get their kids out of diapers early in their second year. And then, a little strong willed two-year-old of my own refused to wear his one morning. I agreed that he could go au-natural as long as he sat on his potty and made a deposit every 30 minutes. He abliged, and the rest is history. I remain attached to the notion that this was HIS idea, because SURELY, I would have to be CRAZY to think I could force any child, let alone my strong-willed 2-year-old, to put his waste anywhere he didn't want it to be. Whew.

Potty training has been an unreasonably easy road for Levi (and as such, for us as parents) and if you want any more details I'm happy to share. I have no tricks though, save a few pieces of sweet reward (m&m for urine, gummy worm for poop). We now use one diaper each day (night time) and it is occasionally dry in the morning if I get to him soon enough. I had NO CLUE little bodies were capable of holding it so long. I'M NOT EVEN capable of holding it that long. Just sayin'.

The weather in Nebraska has taken a turn for the HOT, as per usual around here. We're enjoying 90-100 degree temps and hanging out by our wading pool under the shade of the giant silver maple that I spend all fall cleaning up after. That tree, man, I despise it from September to December, but it sure is nice to have during the summer. We've also spent time with friends at their various pools and back yard sprinklers. My child continues his affinity for all things wet - we refer to him often as our little fish. He'll happily dish out the splashes, but he can take 'em too.

Most recently we spent the 4th of July holiday at a local parade with friends of ours - it was so fun to watch the change in Levi since last year - this year he RAN for the candy being thrown from each float. He grinned at all the fire trucks and motorcycles, and other assorted vehicle floats that passed us by (last year, by contrast, he wailed). Of course all of that made for a very tuckered out little boy who took a delightfully long nap before we went to our neighbors' home for a picnic dinner complete with ice-cream sundaes.

The longer we live here the more grateful we are for the collection of friends we've made. Summertime, and all the fun togetherness that comes with it, makes it even more enjoyable to be raising a family here in Lincoln.

Have I forgotten anything? Oh, yes indeed, about a billion pictures; Ultrasound pictures, birthday pictures, parade pictures, petting local livestock pictures, and pictures of very many other varieties. They'll come, in time, as I re-gain the energy I'm quite sure I used to have. Having some semblance of appetite wouldn't hurt my energy needs either, but I'm guessing that will return eventually also. Here's hoping anyhow :)

Tightwad Tuesday: "One Man's Trash" (alternately titled: Oh no she didn't!)

2011-04-12T12:03:00.000-07:00

I don't clip coupons.

Let me rephrase that. I didn't clip coupons.

Ok, well, I USED to clip coupons, and then I had a colicy infant, and couponing just didn't hit a high enough priority rating for me to actually take the time to do it.

Also, I save a TON by admatching around town at my local bottom-of-the-barrel grocer. It seems to me that the majority of people who use coupons actually end up spending more than they naturally would, and so I stayed away from them all together. We've maintained the mentality that it's better on our wallet to "do without" something than it is to buy it at a discount. Obviously, something purchased at a discount is more expensive than not buying it in the first place.

So, in December of 2009 I canceled our newspaper subscription. My wonderful neighbor agreed to let me have the grocery circulor's from her paper which made it a pretty good set-up. After all, it had been months by then since I'd even clipped a coupon from our Sunday paper and, although it cost us only $52/year, I wasn't making that back in coupons alone.

aaaaaaaaanyway...

I have two friends in particular that are incredible couponers. I am exhausted when I think of all the work they do rounding up deals. They are both careful to match up ads, with coupons, and only to buy what they ordinarily would - often forgoeing even the greatest of deals if it would mean a dollar wasted on something that isn't necessary to buy. I have a lot to learn from these two - but one tidbit I learned this past week was put into practice immediately.

I can't believe I'm about to admit this...

On monday after playgroup I made a stop on the way home. Not at a store, not for lunch. No, I stopped at my local recycling center. Not to deliver my recyclables, no. Wait for it... To dumpster dive for coupons. No joke.

And it was easier than I ever imagined possible. There were three bins for newspapers, each stuffed to the brim with nothing but clean (some untouched) papers. With ease I rifled through them to find the prized Sunday papers and their coupons therein. Ten short minutes (and a few awkward glances from passers by) later I was back in my car, with a content snack-clutching toddler, and a large stack of Sunday coupon inserts. Multiples of the same one even.

It wasn't until I arrived home that I realized the bounty of my find. Although there was a mass of coupons I'll never use (for items I couldn't imagine leaving a store with unless they were down right FREE), my 10 minutes of diving time yielded me coupons for multiple commodities that we regularly purchase - items I consistently wait on sales for to purchase in bulk. Coffee, mayo, creamer, cheese, sugar, toothpaste... and the list goes on.

Now, here's the tricky part. They all have expiration dates. Duh. And because I'm NOT ABOUT to use a coupon on an item whose generic alternative I could purchase for less, I must wait until a deal comes around. That's where a few of my favorite blogs come in handy - these blog writers are excellent at scouting out combinations which lead to nearly free products. It boggles my mind. Really.

So if you ever see my red Forester parked out by the recycling center - give me a kind glance and not one that reeks of "Oh no she isn't!". I'll be sure to shoot you the same glance in return when you join me in the bounty of One Man's Trash.

Biting off...

2011-04-05T11:31:00.000-07:00

...more than I can chew?

That, we shall see. This week/weekend I have the pleasure of taking care of Levi's best friend (or partner in crime, however you want to look at it). Now, I watch this little dude during the day all the time. His mommy does the same for Levi. We trade date nights weekly. These two boys know eachothers* homes inside and out... except when it comes to sleeping.

*yes, I know, it's not a word. but it fits so well, I had to.

You see, while I find myself perfectly competent shuffling these two-under-two around aaaalllll day long, feeding them, playing fun games, and making sure they don't poke eachothers* eyes out (because trust me, they've tried), I have NO IDEA how to deal with two toddlers during the wee hours of the night.

Oh, I know what you're thinking. "they're nearly two-years-old. The simply MUST sleep through the night, right?" well, the answer to that is yes, mostly. but you see Levi's poor little friend knows something is up. In fact, Levi knows something is up too, and if you're a mother you KNOW that when your kid knows something is different, or about to happen, it eats away at their sleep. Both naps, and night sleep suffer. And can you blame them? Change is hard on little bodies and although it may not be obvious during the day while these two are playing, I'm certain both of their reactions to change will come out of the closet at night, at least to some degree.

So, I'm trying to cover all my bases, and I'd surely appreciate any advice you have.

These two are in cribs in separate rooms. Each room has a sound machine in it. Between the two rooms (in the hallway) I've placed a box fan, on HIGH. Why am I going to all this trouble? Simply put, because I don't plan on running in at the first whimper from either of them, and I don't want them to wake each other up. Our house is petite, and there is no insulation between the walls, so I need to make as much white noise as I can.

Oh, and I have a video monitor on each of their cribs. NOW I'm glad I got that second camera!

Advice please?!

Bragging rights

2011-04-01T11:05:00.000-07:00

Ordinarily I have none - Levi takes all our family's aloted bragging rights for his own.

This week, however, thanks to these wonderful blogging ladies who scope out fantastic grocery deals all over the city (matching great deals with coupons and ad-matches), I have a bounty of bragging to do.

The picture below is what I picked up at Hy-Vee this morning.

I spent a total of $14.30

Now I understand that, in itself, isn't very impressive - mostly because $14.30 is a rather high number and it is difficult to assess the value of the items above just by looking at them, so I'll put this into perspective a couple different ways, and then I'll explain how I did it.

These ten boxes of cereal and four gallons of milk would ordinarily have cost $46.83 at Hy-Vee.
The four gallons worth of whole milk alone would have come to $14.00 (costing at least $3.50/ea)
I saved just over 69% on my entire purchase

I can't claim any credit for my outstanding savings today - as I mentioned earlier, these ladies did all the work for me. Essentially, I took advantage of an already great deal on Kellogg's cereal (only certain varieties, and only certain sizes were included) at Hy-Vee, and the ongoing deal they have with Kellog (buy 3 boxes of cereal, get one gallon of milk free!). I also used a few manufacturer's coupons found on the Kellogg website.

There was only one other thing that made this deal sweeter than sweet. By dividing my 10-box purchase up into 3 transactions, I earned three gallons of milk. Hy-vee will allow you to choose any milk (even rice or soy) up to a value of $3.50. So, essentially, I had $10.50 in "free milk" to play with. Lucky me, half gallons of milk were on sale for $1.28 each, so I was allowed to take EIGHT of them home (totaling 4 gallons instead of three) for the alloted $10.50 in "free milk".

Whew. Did you follow that? I'm not even sure I did.

All that said, I could have run off with even a better deal if I hadn't been a wee bit picky about the cereal varieties I wanted. Apparently Kellogg has an ongoing offer for a $10 visa gift card when you buy 10 boxes off a certain list of cereals. I wasn't particularly keen on the list of cereals, and none of them were part of the Hy-Vee sale, so (knowing my own perpensity to FORGET to mail in those mail-in rebates) I ditched that idea.

How about you, any steals worth bragging about?

Breaking the Silence

2011-03-17T12:01:00.001-07:00

I have never much liked roller-coasters.

Maybe its that I'm not too thrilled with big thrills - but mostly, I think it's a matter of fact that I totally dislike the feeling of my stomach residing somewhere between my throat and lips.

But this past three wees - what a roller-coaster they've been.

Up until Sunday, the 13th of March I would have plainly told you that I've lived 28 years with few disappointing moments. There have been few (if any) times I've felt the bottom drop out of my life, so to speak. Of course, there have been moments of doubt, of longing, of fear - but few disappointments. I've felt (and been outspoken about feeling) very blessed - blessed almost to the point of wondering when something big and ugly is going to happen. Because God works like that, right? Blessing, blessing, blessing, SMITING! (wrong, but that's how it feels sometimes)

...If you aren't in the mood for things to get ugly, this is the place you need to stop reading. I'm not saying that as some clever ploy so that you'll keep reading, I'm saying that because I don't want to ruin your day. I could just not write about this at all, but something inside of me feels compelled to do so before I am able to move on from it and return to the petty details of things like making yogurt, and jam, and washing diapers.

Last Sunday morning I faced one of my worst fears. Head on. An in a split second my reality - my newly formed identity - was washed away. The tears that followed were only a foreshadowing of the tears that were to come as I came to the quick realization that the baby I had carried for nearly six weeks was no longer mine to carry.

I crumbled to the bathroom floor. I melted. the reality of losing that baby was heavier than I ever could have imagined. And the deep, red, physical reminder of what was happening at that very moment was numbing.

Although I had given lip service, many times, to the notion that so many pregnancies fail prior to the 12th week, (it would take me many sets of hands to count the number of friends I have who've gone through this very horror) nothing could have prepared me or otherwise desensitized me to my new reality. It's one thing to acknowledge that miscarriage "happens", it's quite another to experience it. The physical pain pales in comparison to the emotional heartache - to the soul drenching grief that follows it.

To those of you who are wondering what to say, I'll offer you this:

Yes, if it was going to happen at all, I'm glad it happened this early on

Yes, I'm glad we hadn't yet told very many people about our pregnancy

Yes, I'm so happy I already have a beautiful, thriving, nursing, son

Yes, I know that everything happens for a reason

Yes, I understand time will bring healing

And I know, you probably "don't really know what to say"

Neither do I.

And so I think I will stay quiet on this issue for the time being - until some light bulb goes off in the center of my soul and I am allowed to see WHY things like this happen - or at least until I feel like I have a normal body again.

In the mean time I would appreciate it if you stayed quiet on the issue as well. Your kind words mean a lot, but I don't really want to be reminded about this any more than I have to be. Not that I'm trying to brush it under the carpet (quite the contrary) but more that, in order to maintain some level of sanity, I need to re-focus on the joys of life instead of the awful ugliness and total devastation that I wish never to experience again.

And in that vein - the joy that surrounds me - I think it's high time I begin posting about what we Nebraskans have been up to. simple things, like yogurt, and jam, and diapers - and Artisan Bread in Five Minutes a Day.

2011-03-15T18:48:00.000-07:00

Taking a bit of a blogging hiatus. I'll go into the "why" at a later date. It's been a long and trialsome week+ around here and I am in desperate need of space and time to sort out all the details.

Amid the storm I am forever grateful that I serve a God whose sovereignty does not waver despite the most difficult of circumstances.

Cheeseball, ham, and strawberry jam

2011-03-10T12:02:00.000-08:00

So lately, this is what I get when I say "Hey Levi, Smile for Mommy"

Cheeseball...

And this is what I got the other day when I told him he could pick out *one* "friend" to take to the grocery store with us. In his hands are "whitie", "bluie", and "Max". And he holds in his mouth a woefully empty packet of applesauce (or other fruit/veggie puree) given to him by his friend Sam's mom.

Ham...

And this is what I made the other day when I discovered we were out of (husband's favorite) whipped cream cheese. I (wait for it) actually whipped some regular old (cheapo-pulled-out-of-my-freezer-from-when-it-went-on-sale-for-.49-per-block) cream cheese. Turns out, all they put in that little tub is regular cream cheese, with air. Go figure.

And then I added some of my strawberry jam.

Presto chango, strawberry cream cheese.

In other news, we did end up purchasing the video baby monitor I was talking about. I NEVER thought I would one one. Wait, let me re-phrase that. I told myself I would NEVER "waste" my money on something so obviously trivial and unnecessary. *blush*. If you can't hear me from wherever you happen to be, I'm singing a new tune now.

We went with this one, and also got a second camera for whenever we end up needing it. The system supports 4 total. In brief, I love the darn thing. It's not that I think Levi needs to be watched every sleeping moment, but it sure is nice (during naptime especially) to hear a bump above me and be able to look at the screen and see him roll over and drift back off. My only complaint is that the system interferes with our wireless router (which is, admittedly, coming up on 10 years old). I've managed to circumvent the issue, but eventually we may just need to upgrade our router.

Meanwhile, I'm drafting a well-earned thank-you note to my grandfather (photos included) without whose Birthday gift none of this would have been possible/prudent.

Confessions of a tightwad

2011-03-04T13:38:00.000-08:00

This week I purchased a 50lb bag of quick oats because they went on sale for $0.56/lb. My husband thinks I'm crazy, who am I to argue?
Completely contrary to my thrifty purchase, I am also looking into the possibility of purchasing one of these. Go ahead, roll your eyes. You know you want to. But really, you don't know how cool they are until one well meaning friend lets you borrow theirs. And then, presto chango, you're hooked.
I have spent the past 5 years of my married life purchasing laundry detergent without having a SINGLE CLUE that it was so easy to make. And how cheap! And make it I will. I got a few recipes here (it's the duggar family's website)
As of my last count (last week, when they went on sale for $0.99/ea) I have 52 one-pound chubs of lean ground turkey in my deep freezer. One of my dear friend's assures me that in the case of nuclear fall-out, she will be headed to my house for shelter and sustenance.
My son, yes, my delightful almost-two-year-old, is STILL NAPPING. There, now I've likely jinxed myself It has been 3 hours.
I e-filed our taxes the 3rd of Feb. My refund has not yet arrived. I am grouchy - so grouchy about this that I have in fact changed our witholding status such that we will recieve very little of a refund next year. I am SO SICK of the government holding on to well over $3,000 of our money when we could be earning interest on it throughout the year OURSELVES. Hmph.
This week I spent $15.00 at the grocery store on fresh produce alone. I can't help myself. Sometimes, fresh cauliflower, brussles sprouts, broccoli, and peppers call to me in my sleep. If we ever decide to religiously follow a local food movement, I'm hosed, because I'm reasonably sure nobody in Nebraska grows mangos.
If we go through yogurt any faster in this house I am going to write a book titled "How to go through a half gallon of yogurt in less than a week". It's outrageous. It rivals our banana complex. At least it's cheap to make, that's what I keep telling myself.
Gas prices have doubled here in the last two weeks. Don't I live in the Mid-west? Arent things supposed to be cheaper here? Try 3.59/g. So, I tried to walk to the library with my son a few days ago. Epic fail. please note, you really shouldn't take your toddlers for walks in sub-zero temps. Without gloves. Enough said.

Naturally, my prediction was correct, and my toddler is awake.

Cheerio. (or, if you're me, oatmeal)

Tightwad Tuesday: The Healthy Wallet and the Healthy Heart

2011-02-22T10:38:00.000-08:00

Alternately titled: How budgeting is like dieting

(except I despise the word "dieting" because it implies a short term fix to reach a long term goal. Not do-able in my book, which is why I prefer the words "healthy lifestyle". Long term. ok, moving on.)

In light of a post earlier on this week, I thought I'd jot down a few things I've realized lately. Over the past, oh, two months (a little less) as I've been taking a good long look at the nutritional lifestyle here at the Hnosko's household. I've noticed that many of the principles of healthy eating I'm trying to re-integrate also apply (quite directly) to healthy spending. Or, to rephrase that, the principles of healthy, long-term weight management, may be more similar to the principles of healthy, long-term financial stewardship than I ever knew.

If you're reading this then you probably already know that I'm not writing any of this down to make anyone believe "I've arrived", or that I in any way "have it all figured out" when it comes to saving/spending/etc. Keeping track of these "ah-ha" moments in writing though, helps me better identify ways in which I can improve - so, that said, here's what I've come to find...

Everything in Moderation.

I've found that if I go about weight loss in a stringent, many-things-are-off-limits kind of way, I fail. Why? Because it is human nature (or, my nature anyway) to want what I cannot have. Aside from that, once the weight loss transformation is complete, staying away from those no-no's completely will be all-but impossible - I'll have to re-integrate them somehow and there's a good chance I won't do so with moderation. Similarly, if we go about budgeting in such a way that whole categories of spending are "off limits", we won't last. Deprivation will always win.

There are two ways we've tackled this in our family. First, we re-defined "deprived". Five years ago I would have told you that never being able to go out to eat was depriving because hey, we work hard, we've earned a simple $7 burger and fries. Today, with our goals what they are, that same $7 burger and fries are a luxury, and no longer something I feel "deprived of". By re-defining the things we feel like we've "earned", we have less of a desire to spend on things we don't need, and more of a desire to work toward the long-term goals whose way is paved by healthy financial decisions

Second, we started giving ourselves *gasp* spending money. It may sound counter productive, but giving ourselves each $20 a week to do with what we choose was liberating. Coffee with a friend? yes. Frozen yogurt downtown? Sure. But when it's gone, it's gone. Like Dave Ramsay, we call it our "blow money".

What I've learned: don't define my value by what I do and purchase/spend money on. Give myself wiggle room, and respect its given boundaries of moderation.

When I cheat, I'm not cheating the budget/diet, I'm cheating myself

Because I chose to lose weight with the new Weight-Watchers program, I was given a "daily points allowance". In addition to that, I was also given a "weekly allowance" to do with what I chose. Those points were mine to use or lose. There were enough of extra points to have a slice of cheesecake one night a week, or enough to eat a slightly larger portion a few dinners out of the week. Although I was rarely low on points, there were days when I would peek in my refrigerator and pick something up between thumb and forefinger and slip it into my mouth. Without "paying" the points for it. Without writing it down. It was cheating. Why cheating feels so good I'll never know, because when it comes down to it YOU'RE CHEATING YOURSELF, not the dumb diet.

Same goes with our budget. When we overspend to get something we want but haven't planned for, we aren't cheating our budget, we're cheating ourselves out of the goals we previously set. When I stand in target (a place I only go when I have a coupon in hand, or a prescription to pick up, because I know it's a dangerous place for me) and rummage through the dollar isle for "deals" I've got no blow money left for, I'm not cheating the system, I'm cheating myself.

What I've learned: Plan my meals/budget realistically, and then be honest, and stick to them.

Tomorrow is a new day: Today's/yesterday's slips-ups are NO EXCUSE for giving up or otherwise putting things off.

Everyone goofs up. Everyone has weak moments. In healthy living those moments look like the reception at aunt myrtle's wedding where you had three pieces of triple chocolate cake. That one weak moment starts a chain of poor choices that catepault you towards a bucketload of negative self-talk, which ultimately causes you to think this whole "healthy lifestyle thing" pointless, and impossible goal to achieve.

In healthy spending the same is true: past financial goof-ups shouldn't be the cause for refusing to try today. Sure, mistakes made in the past may have carved a HUGE hole, and that hole may be very difficult to get out of, but it makes no sense to allow that hole to keep you from trying. We've all got to start somewhere, and today is as good a time as any.

What I've learned: The moment when a mistake is made (be it diet or budget related) is the very moment for reflection and re-grouping - not for throwing in the towel

Discipline, Obedience, Wisdom and Prudence aren't just for biblical scholars anymore

If reading through the first few chapters of Proverbs has taught me anything at all, it's that discipline, obedience, and prudence are the keys to wisdom. King Solomon, the biblically acclaimed "wisest man who ever lived", makes that very clear. Laziness, short-cuts, and excuses will rarely harbor value, and rarely yield positive long term results.

This goes for healthy living, as well as healthy spending. Crash diets rarely work long term because they focus only on immediate change, not long term transformation. Similarly, strict but short-term financial plans don't have a good track record for long term success. I would surmise that the reason for this is the lack of time and effort spent treating these as lifestyle changes. I'm no expert on ANY of this, but it seems to me the changes (be they budget or diet oriented) which can conceivably be maintained over a lifetime, are the changes that yield maintainable results.

What I've learned: I live in a world where being disciplined is only valued and rewarded in the short term. But in order to reach my goals, and be an example to my children, I have to swim upstream; I have to maintain a lifestyle of discipline, of moderation; a lifestyle that seeks and follows long-term wisdom instead of short-term fun and folly.

So, that's what's been rolling between my ears over the past two weeks. I guess my real question in all of this is why does being disciplined have to be so difficult? I mean, if you're a believer like I am then you no-doubt know that a disciplined life is what we're called to, but why does it have to be so counter-culture. Any thoughts?

Getting Personal

2011-02-18T11:54:00.000-08:00

I haven't said much about this because, well, because I find that I quickly lose my focus if I go telling everyone where it is...

Also, because I am human (and therefore quite dislike airing my own failures) part of me didn't want anyone to know for fear that if I were to "fail", I'd have to out myself publicly.

But today, on a beautiful "spring" like Nebraska afternoon, after 6 weeks of steady resolution and determination, after a relatively peacefully submission to the reality that one cannot reach ones goal without some hard work, I feel like speaking up.

Don't hold your breath, this isn't going to be a *WOW* moment, folks.

Finally, what went up for 9 months of pregnancy, has now come down after 20 months of mothering, and 6 weeks of Weight Watchers*. Adios 8 pounds, adios. You were a fair weather friend, but how I longed to see you go.

To almost everyone I know, 8 pounds is hardly an accomplishment, but for me it represents a lot. You'd have to have known me WAY-back-when (Christina, you reading this?) to understand this fully, but by choosing healthy avenues by which to bring myself to better health, (instead of choosing the self-ruining short cuts I've taken in my distant past) I've proven my own success prior to losing a single ounce. I have shown myself what determination, and discipline can do.

8 pounds is 5% of my body. 8 pounds was my goal, but I did not choose it. Weight Watchers chose it for me. My goal includes 2 more pounds. So, forward we march. Forward towards better health. Forward toward eating habits I can maintain for a lifetime, portion sizes that are realistic, ideals focused on health and not body image.

Would you care to join me?

*In case you are even partially familiar with Weight Watchers (as I was prior to my re-joining) you should know that it has changed, A LOT since Jan 2011. Points calculations have changed, daily points alotments have changed - everything. If you want to know more, I'd be happy to share, but suffice it to say (I know, I say that too much) the plan is now a lot more balanced, including in its calculations protein, carbohydrates, fiber, and fat. While I won't go out on a limb and say I haven't been hungry, and every thing has been a bowl full of cherries over the past 6 weeks, I WILL say that I've experienced more balance, I've treated my body with respect, and I've nourished my entire family on the things that I've eaten while losing weight. Thus ends my Weight Watchers Promo.

2011-02-16T12:34:00.000-08:00

Spring is in the air...

The best laid plans of mice and moms (and you know how the rest goes)

2011-02-14T11:18:00.001-08:00

You may remember this post, where I wrote out my method for yogurtmaking. Well, suffice it to say, I'm still learning. That isn't to infer that I've had a bunch of "failed", trashed batches - I've actully had relatively few of those - but the consistency of some of them has been lacking something. Namly: Thickness.

Recently, and I only figured out why over this past weekend, my yogurt has been runnier than I've liked. Now, I could just skip adding gelatin, and instead run it through cheesecloth, but then I end up with a much lower yield of yogurt, so I've been trying (and trying and trying, to the extend that yogurt making is no longer a money-saving project, but rather a hobby that I'm DETERMINED to make worth the money I've put into it) to get it as thick as I like it without sacrificing yield.

Well, I finally got it. I ended up changing just a couple things. First, I decided to add my sugar (about 2/3C now) after my milk cooled back down to 115 degrees. Second, I sprinkled my gelatin (now 1.5 packets instead of just 1) over the (cold, organic) yogurt starter and let it "set up" for 3-5 minutes before dissolving it in the warm milk. Ok, so, all these things (and a few other little details) worked together and I ended up with BEAUTIFUL yogurt. I took it out of the crockpot, divided it into my little 8oz cups, and the next morning I could set them on their sides and they would hold their shape - without any yucky gelatin mouthfeel whatsoever.

See?

I can't get over how perfect it turned out. Needless to say, I was thrilled. Not so much thrilled about having great yogurt, but more thrilled just to have conquered my problem. To have figured it out. But alas, the penny pincher in me was also happy to have a half gallon of thick, creamy, whole milk yogurt for my son and husband to enjoy.

Wow. was it thick or what? (if you're one of the few reading this who actually make yogurt, and you want the detailed breakdown, lemme know)

And so you may be wondering why I am referring to said "perfect batch" in the past tense. Well, that evening as I was cleaning up my yogurt-making dishes, I came upon my trusty candy thermometer. Although I had rinsed it off, it still appeared to have milk on it. Wait, no, that milk was INSIDE it.

No. Way.

My candy thermometer was broken. The simple fact that it had milk inside it told me that it had indeed broken whilste inside my milk-filled crockpot - I likely bumped it on the inside of the pot when I was checking it's temperature. So, somewhere inside my ten perfect containers of perfect yogurt were whoknowshomany teeny tiny shards of thermometer glass.

Carnage though it was, all of that beautiful yogurt - along with Saturday morning's time and effort - went down the drain. Literally.

I'll be honest and tell you that I had to dump it quickly. It was like ripping off a bandaid.

And you can laugh if you like (because I do realize the ridiculousness of mourning a half gallon of milk, 4oz of starter, 2/3C sugar, and 1.5 packets of galatin) but hopefully you won't have another chance to, because yesterday, I ordered one of these.

And so, hopefully, this will be my very last post about yogurt making. Unless of course I get all crazy and making flavored items - then you may just hear about it.

Proverbs 1

2011-02-11T12:47:00.001-08:00

I've been reading through the book of Proberbs recently and I keep coming back to chapter one. It is amazing to me (divine, maybe) how much chapter one relates to my very desire desire - the ways I wish to conduct my life, the character I wish to impart to my kids.

My legacy.

Proverbs, written by the "wisest man who ever lived" reads like this:

"The proverbs of Solomon son of David, king of Israel:

² for attaining wisdom and discipline;
for understanding words of insight;
³ for acquiring a disciplined and prudent life,
doing what is right and just and fair;
⁴ for giving prudence to the simple,
knowledge and discretion to the young—
⁵ let the wise listen and add to their learning,
and let the discerning get guidance—

I bolded and italicized the phrases that JUMPED off the page at me.

THIS is what I am seeking: Wisdom & Prudence

Seeing the right path laid out in front of me, making wise decisions when there are multiple options. Weighing possibilities and, without haste, making wise, prudent choices.

I can see (although only a little) why Solomon asked the Great High God for wisdom, when he could have had anything in the world: He wanted to make good choices, and he knew that those choices would affect his livelihood as much as any of ours do. Small choices, big choices, they may matter to varying degrees, but they all do matter.

When I think about Wisdom and Prudence I think of the things I want them for: Spending is a good example. I want to prudently use the resources we've been entrusted with. Time is another example: I want to slay selfish time-wasting in honor of prudently allocating time to the things I've been called to. I say this because I'm an avid time-waster - which leads me to discipline...

THIS is what I must have and pass on to my kids: Discipline.

Maybe this is all-so evident recently because I've been making changes in my life that require discipline. They require prudence. Staying on track with a budget for example, by its very nature, requires discipline. Maintaining a healthy diet and lifestyle requires discipline. Using time wisely requires discipline

And it ISN'T EASY. We all know that. It may sound redundant, but I think it requires discipline to be disciplined! My fleshly desires do NOT win when I'm disciplined. Oftentimes, they lose. Out right.

I do not have all my thoughts sorted out (I'm sure that's painfully evident in my hap-hazard writing) but one thing is certain: God expects us to seek prudence, and to have discipline in our lives. And that, friends, is a character trait I want my son to see in my life, and one that I want to see in his.

Thus ends my Proverbs 1 "Ah-HA!" moment.

"Music"

2011-02-07T11:30:00.000-08:00

Come, They Told me...

Pa Rum pa pum pum...

...On my drum.

A few pictures

2011-02-02T12:17:00.000-08:00

Here's a little bit of what we've been up to lately:

Bedtime stories with daddy (a nightly event) in the rocking chair - banana in hand, cup at the ready, and "puppy" within arms reach.

Sick day/snow day (also, with banana in hand. I live with two monkeys). Recently, this monkey learned how to say "cheese" for the camera, and added to that a VERY cheesy grin.

Bouncing and playing at Solid Rock Gymnastics toddler time. Awesome place. He's in the yellow shirt.

Again, at solid rock, about to jump into one of their three foam pits. Can't get out on his own yet so I *get* to jump in and assist. You may not be able to see it far off in the distance, but there is a zip line at the corner of this pit. Totally awesome.

Enjoying "toddler team-up" at the childrens' museum, pouring multi-colored rice into different containers (and, later, throwing it all over the room). Also enjoyed that day were tempera paints with brushes and stamps, markers, and LOTS of soap and water.

Had to get some of these up before I forgot all about them. Enjoy!

Tightwad Tuesday: Chicken Run

2011-02-01T15:00:00.000-08:00

Or a run, on chicken.

In our home, we usually have one. A run on chicken that is. As one of the leanest meats, we eat a lot of it. Well, I guess "a lot" is up to interpretation (I'll get to that), but we probably eat it 2-3x weekly.

In our college years my husband and I purchased, almost exclusively, frozen, boneless, skinless, chicken breast. Why? Because it was the cheapest meat out there of course. WAY cheaper than ground beef. Cheaper even than the available ground turkey. And although we didn't (and still don't) have meat every night, we FLEW through chicken. Because chicken is the NUMBER ONE meat sold in America (by pounds), I thought I'd share what we've learned about buying chicken since then our college years, and what we've done that's dramatically impacted our grocery bill, and out eating habits.

It may have been just about a year ago now that I discovered Louis Rich Ground Turkey. It comes on little one-pound tubes. Twice (or maybe three times?) per year it goes on sale (at russ's usually) for $0.79/lb. I like two things about this turkey: first, is already divided into one pound servings. It is WAY TOO EASY to use more ground meat than a recipe calls for because ground meat almost never comes in a quantity this small. Even so, the acceptable portion size for meat is about 4oz raw. Or, 1/4 of this neat little tube. I'm sure you could already deduce that when these go on sale I buy cases of them. Literally. At least two. The second thing I like about this turkey is that it isn't the leanest of cuts. Although it compares nutritionally to 93% lean ground beef, it isn't as lean as "ground turkey breast", making it perfect for burger and taco applications where a little fat is desirable.

So, first thing we learned about poultry: ground turkey is cheaper than chicken breast. The second came about more recently. After doing a bit of researching (and fine print reading) I learned that frozen chicken breast is "preserved in up to 15% solution to maintain quality". Just what exactly does that mean? It means they glaze the chicken in a salt/water brine to make it taste more tender, and to keep it from getting freezer burn. Genious - except remember, the consumer pays for that salt water.

So, the 2.5lb bag of frozen chicken I used to purchased for $6.48 (on sale) was really just shy of 2.2lbs of chicken - and I paid roughly 2.94/lb for it. It was convenient, and it didn't *look* expensive at what I thought was around $2.50/lb. So after figuring all this out I started pricing fresh, raw chicken breast (which, I assumed, would be more expensive). Turns out, it goes on sale semi-regularly for 1.77/lb. And all of that, friends, is chicken. But the problem I ran into is that this fresh raw chicken is not NEARLY as juicy and delicious as the frozen stuff. Why? That salt-water brine.

So, after purchasing (...counts for a moment) 12 pounds of chicken breast this past week, here is what I did to increase 1) its quantity, and 2) it's quality.

1) A moment ago I made the comment that a standard acceptable portion of meat is around 4oz. As Americans we tend to look at a chicken breast and assume that it, in itself, is a serving. But you see, over the past 20 years, commodity chicken farmers have *learned* how to plump up their chickens* After weighing out each of the hmm... Twelve single breast halves I purchased, I can assure you that each one of them contained 3-4 reasonable servings of meat. So, the first thing I did was to cut them all into appropriate sizes using my kitchen scale. They averaged 4 oz. Quantity: check.

*It goes without saying, here, that organic, "pastured" chicken would be HIGHLY superior in both taste and health-attributes to commodity purchased chicken breast. If you have access and the means to support sustainable meat practices, (i.e. a meat co-op, or CSA program) PLEASE DO SO. Otherwise, keep a keen eye on portion size and remember: whatever went into that meat, is also going into you.

2) In order to increase the quality of my chicken, I did what the Tyson folks do: I brined it. Gasp! Yes, I soaked it overnight in a salt/sugar/citrus/herb solution and you WOULD NOT BELIEVE how juicy, moist, and tasty it is. Here's my recipe

Fill your soup pot half full of water.
Add to that a half cup salt, and a half cup brown sugar. stir it until it disolves.
Add to that one large orange, cut up into 8 or so pieces, and one large lemon, cut the same.
Stir in some thyme, and some rosemarry.
Add all your raw chicken pieces. Top off with water to cover.
Refrigerate overnight (12-16 hours, give or take)

After all my chicken brined, I separated it out into one-quart freezer bags, each containing four adult portions. I found I had enough for roughly 35 single servings, plus about 4 servings of stir-fry chunks (trim pieces). In our home, that equates to 16-18 full meals. Was it worth the 45 minutes it took me to get all that prep done/mess cleaned up? When you consider my approximate $14.04 in savings over buying frozen whole breasts (which would need to be thawed/de-ice-glazed/cut into appropriate sizes anyhow), I'd say $17.55 an hour is a wage worth working for. But, you be the judge.

Whew.

Now it shouldn't go without noting that, no matter WHAT you're talking about grocery wise, there is always a cheaper option. The cheaper option in this case is to forget the chicken breast, and buy a cheaper cut. Or, forgo the cut chicken, and opt for a whole bird (roughly $99/lb on sale, but those pounds include skin and bones, and other parts you'll throw away). And beans are another inexpensive option.

This may seem tedious, and maybe it's not for you. I understand - some of us wierdos just have a proclivity for making something very small seem like a very big deal. Forgive me if it looks as though I'm trying to split hairs. In our household though, we're making a (very conscious) effort to stay on track financially, and here, meat is a part of that plan.

Do you have any ways you save on the meat isle? Has do-it-yourself prep proven to save you money in other ways? Does anyone have any big theories when it comes to meat purchasing? I've found that it isn't until I try to do something at home (instead of buying something pre-done) that I realize it isn't as hard as I made it out to be - and that it isn't worth the cost. But some things ARE worth that cost. Any examples?

NOT ME Monday

2011-02-01T11:28:00.000-08:00

Let me begin this post by saying that I certainly did NOT forget to post a not-me post yesterday. I always remember everything. During Levi's nap, I always make the very best use of my time, and instead of using the computer for fruitless tasks like blogging and facebooking, I was probably building scale models of the empire state building for my son to admire, and learn from, later. Forget? not me. And even if I did, it wouldn't take This friend, and This friend, to remind me via their oh-so-hilarious not-me-Monday posts.

The past few days have been Full - nay - overflowing with things I did NOT do. Better yet, things I did NOT discover. For example, it was NOT ME who discovered my 20 month old in our living room this morning wielding a RED permanent marker. No, I know from the (horrific) mistakes of others that it is important to keep those WAY out of reach. And it is because I have a great grasp of this principal that I did NOT also find my son in our kitchen with a step-stoop pushed up to the counter, and a steak knife in his tiny, malicious hand. Nope, not me. I'm a highly cautions parent with a penchant for safety.

We are always healthy in this house. So, it should come as no surprise to you that we are NOT sick this week. My son does NOT have a stomach virus, and even if he did, it would not be NEARLY reason enough for the FIVE loads of laundry I've done over the past day and a half. I have NOT cloroxed everything from the highchair, to the floors, to the WALLS because of "misplaced" liqui-poo, nor have I entered my son's room (what was it honey, 2:45am?) to find him sleeping in said mess. Having said that, I should also make you aware that we ONLY have baths in this house before bedtime. I did NOT plop a messy-head-to-toe boy in the tub after a lunchtime poo-splosion.

And you should know, that because I am ecologically inclined, and also financially frugal, I have NOT used a single disposable diaper throughout the entirety of this event. And not, like, 20 of them either. No sir, we only use cloth in this family. No. matter. what.

And finally, it was NOT ME, (the owner of an all-wheel-drive Subaru, with studded tires) who made it half way to my down-town destination today, and turned around because the snow-on-top-of-ice was just too much for me. Why would I do a crazy thing like that? I lived in Pullman WA after all, a town which above all else is known for three things: Hills, Snow, and Wheat. I pride myself in being able to drive in ANY conditions, and I enjoy the challenge. As such, I would not have settled for a trip to Hy-vee as our only outing of the day. Even if I did, I would not have stopped there for the sole purpose of picking up eight half-gallons of whole milk, each on sale (with coupon) for $0.48. I'm a down-to-earth woman who understands that $0.48 milk is no reason to take your sick toddler out in the negative 21 degree wind chill.

Alright. Whew. Cathartic.

Anyone else?

By the way, in case you, too, think this not-me-ing thing is fun, you should check out this blog, by the woman who started all the not-me-ing in the first place. Great blog.

One of many firsts

2011-01-27T11:36:00.000-08:00

Before:

During:

After:

The whole ordeal took - no joke - 3 1/2 minutes. Poor kid thought we were about to clip his ears off. And when she buzzed his neck - wow. I'm glad I took him in though, and watched someone else trim his hair before I try to attack those whispies with scissors myself. The way he was thrashing around, it could have been fatal.

Anyway, thus ends our FIRST experience taking Levi to get a haircut. Whew!

Tightwad Tuesday: My time is valuable

2011-01-25T12:13:00.000-08:00

There have been SO SO SO many times over the past - oh, I don't know - 5 years that I've said to myself, during my own contemplation of a given purchase, "this will save me time, and my time is valuable!" and so into the cart it goes. I've said it about everything from specialty kitchen appliances, to mops with disposable covers, and from dishwasher detergent to dryer sheets. Often, I've even coupled the statement with an assertion of value, something like: "and on top of saving me time, it will be so much better/cleaner/softer/tastier/easier than it was before.

Sometimes, these statements have been valid, other times I've used them as an excuse for laziness, and my (human) desire for things that make me feel better about my life. my status.

Because the first statement comes to my mind SO SO SO frequently (could I use that word a little more and still maintain it's validity?) I'll tackle it first. And please remember - I'm not preaching. For all I know, there are only three lucky individuals who read this. Sometimes I just need to write down my own reasoning for why I'm pinching pennies the way I am. Not only does explaining myself make the process easier, but it makes it more tangible - but I digress. Back to saving my "valuable time".

I've used the "valuable time" excuse for at least 5 years. Why? Because I wanted those things. I specifically remember using that excuse to buy all matter of groceries. Convenience items. You know the type: meals in a box (gasp!), frozen bread dough, any number of canned goods. Cereals, granola bars, crackers, you name it! And while, I assure you, buying these items DID save me time, I have recently come to realize that I could have easily made most of these things (at HALF their grocery store cost, if not better) in the time I spend at home with my son. And if not, I can also assure you I could have found an adequate homemade substitute, or (perish the thought) GONE WITHOUT THEM.

I also remember specifically purchasing an espresso machine with the notion that, not only would it save me the time/money of running down to the "daily grind" (Pullman, WA) before work (Basilios), but it would also make me a happier morning person to be around. And as thrilled as I was to have it, not 3 months went by before I was off my latte kick. Saved me time - but eventually cost me more money than it saved. And, as you know, Time = money.

Oh, you've heard it before - but let me spell it out in a way I've come to understand it more recently.

My time doing a particular task is worth the money I save by doing it at home rather than buying it at the store.

There ya go, math wiz's. And I'll give you an example... One pound of dry black beans costs me $1.22. I put those in the crockpot with water. When 6 hours has elapsed I am left with the equivalent of 5.5 cans of black beans - each of which would have cost me roughly $0.76 (or more) at the store. My savings is $0.54 per can, or 2.97 total. Therefore, the 15 minutes of my time it took me to fill the crockpot, empty it, and wash it (I'm being generous) were worth $2.97, or $11.88/hour. That's nearly 50% above Nebraska minimum wage!

All I'm trying to do with all this is re-evaluate how financially valuable my time really is. In reality, it has a LOT of financial value if I use it wisely. Please don't confuse financial value with the tangible value of spending time with your children, or your spouse - those moments are precious - but I would be lying if I didn't admit that one can use their time in a financially wise way AS WELL AS a tangible-family-togetherness way.

To be honest, it all comes down to my ability/desire to get off the couch or get away from the computer, and DO SOMETHING. Do you know what I mean? The lazy, convenience-desiring part of me would rather use "quality time" as an excuse to sit on the couch and watch TV with my son, when clearly there are much more engaging activities the two of us could be doing together, even activities which would ALSO be financially wise. Making playdough is a good example. Or melting down broken crayons in mini-muffin tins.

So, your turn. What convenience item have you done away with in favor of doing it yourself, and making your time that much MORE valuable? Please, do share.

A post about homemade yogurt

2011-01-24T11:52:00.000-08:00

A few people asked me, and so last week I mentioned I would blog about this - so, here goes nothing (well, not nothing, although I feared it would be about a failed attempt at yogurt making - alas, all turned out alright despite my own folly the other night)

I've been making my own yogurt for around 9 months or so - ever since I figured out how much money I could save doing so. Now, if your household doesn't go through much yogurt, this might be irrelevant to you, but we go through the stuff like we do, say, water. So, making my own yogurt is on par with making my own bananas*

*we go through twenty, Yes 20 bananas, weekly. Shame we don't live in a tropical place, or I WOULD figure out a way to grow my own.

Around 9 months ago, I started with the basic recipe a friend told me about, and after some tweaking, and taking a few tips and tricks under consideration, I came up with a recipe/method I feel a) reasonably compares to/is better than store bought yogurt, b) is simple and efficient, and c) saves money. So, on with the my recipe. (note: you may want to refer to that basic recipe eventually, you'll notice mine is a little more complex as per my own tweaking)

Ingredients:

1/2 gallon milk (usually whole, this batch was 2% because it was cheaper. No noticeable difference. Oh, and previously frozen is A-OK, as long as it's fully thawed. And I mean fully.)
1/2 C store-bought yogurt with "live, active, cultures"
1 packet Knox unflavored gelatin
3/4 C sugar, optional (I don't like the taste of plain yogurt. Neither does my toddler. So sue us.)

Method:

Pour the milk (and sugar, if you're using it) into your crock pot.
Turn your crock pot to low.
Set your cell phone (or other alarm) for 2.5 hours

After 2.5 hours has elapsed, UNPLUG YOUR CROCKPOT
set your cell phone (or other alarm) for 3 hours.

Run a load of laundry - heck, run three loads of laundry. Read, do whatever - but DON'T mess with the milk in your crockpot

After 3 hours has elapsed, grab a medium sized bowl. Pour into it your half cup (4oz) of store bought yogurt.
pour on top of it 2 cups of the warm-ish milk from your crockpot
evenly sprinkle the packet of gelatin granuals over the warmish milk - wait 5 seconds.
Whisk all to combine (yogurt, warm-ish milk, gelatin)
recombine mixture with milk in crockpot

Wrap your crockpot in bath towels - sides and top
Now leave it, for 8 hours. Because I let mine sit overnight, and because our kitchen is quite drafty, I leave mine in our oven (OFF of course) with the oven light on. maintains the "warm-ish-ness" a little better. And, afterall, "warm-ish-ness" is what yogurt cultures need to thrive"
Open crockpot, and TA-DA! you've made a half gallon of yogurt! Also known as 64oz. Also known as nearly 11 of the little 6oz yogurts you get at your local grocer. Also known as 16 of the 4oz "yo-baby" whole milk yogurts. whew!

This is what mine looks like straight out of the - er - bathtowels. It's moderately thick on top, and a little runnier underneat the creamy top.

Because we're an "on the go" type of family (and because my hard-working husband takes one MONSTER of a lunch to work each day) I immediately portion or yogurt into Ten 6-7oz servings. Sure, they may look a little messy, and a little runny right now, but once they sit in the refer. for a few hours that gelatin does its work and it firms up quite nicely.

See?

I would be remiss if I didn't add a few caveats to my yogurt-making tale. First, if you make yogurt a good number of times, eventually you'll end up making nothing but runny warm milk. In other words, you'll eventually have a failed batch. If you happen to use gelatin like I do, it will quickly turn into "milk jello" - which, I know from experience, is completely useless for EVERY imaginable application. It was upon such a failure that I discovered the aforementioned tips and tricks website. I discovered that there are specific temperatures yogurt cultures need to thrive, and others at which it they are unequivocally killed.

Don't heat the milk enough initially = fail

Add your culture when milk is still too hot = fail

You get the picture.

The only other thing I want to add is my price comparison. Because this is high fat yogurt - which I feed my toddler - I'll compare it to its equal in fat, calories, and calcium: Stoneyfield farms YoBaby brand.

Around these parts I can get a half gallon of milk (when it goes on SUPER sale) for$0 .99. (Needless to say, when they go on sale, I FILL my chest freezer with them) That comes out to $0.06 per 4oz toddler serving.

Around here, one four-pack of 4oz yo-baby yogurt cups runs $2.49 which comes out to $0.62 per 4oz toddler serving.

For comparison, Danonino (which are not organic as stoneyfield are, but which come in much, much smaller serving sizes, making them look decievingly cheap) cost $1.88/6 1.76oz cups. (Yeah, 1.76oz per itty bitty cup.) So they work out to $0.71/4oz toddler serving.

Alternately, the 6oz yogurt cups I used to purchase for my husband's lunch (generic brand) run an average of $0.42 each. For an equal amount of yogurt, my homemade version costs $0.09. Wowza.

So, there you go. My recipe, my process, and my reasoning for going cheap (and as some would say, ahem, "hippy" - that was the term you used, yes Rachael? :)

Do you make your own yogurt? Do you make something else at home to save on store prices? What is it? How do you do it? I wanna know! Oh, and if you have any successes/ failures with this recipe here, I want to know that too. Always looking to make improvements after all!

Drinking - from a cup

2011-01-20T11:39:00.001-08:00

After donning what we affectionately refer to as "the bib shirt", Levi asked for yogurt. And whence he was sick and tired digging out small bites with his spoon (only to have much of it spill), he decided that this was the proper protocol.

Cute, huh? That's the first time (in my memory, anyway, which isn't saying much) that he's successfully drunk (sp?) from a cup without spilling a drop.

Recently I've come to a resting place with my yogurt recipe/process. I've tweaked it a little, and actually added some sugar (gasp!) so as we don't FLY through the freezer jam whose quantity is quickly dwindling in the basement freezer. I'll blog about my recipe and process next week, and maybe you, too, will want to give it a try. As a teaser, I'll say that I've begun allowing it to "set up" in single-serving, re-usable containers, which make it oh-so-easy for quick grab-and-go eating.

(how's that for over-use of the dash mark?)

My Sinus Solutions (reader-be-warned)

2011-01-19T11:23:00.000-08:00

I'd like to think I came from a family pool of pretty good genes. Sure, I'm terrible at all things mathematical, and my hair has a cow-lick I simply cannot conquer, but overall I have little to complain about. However, if there's one place where genetics handed me a stocking full of coal, it would have to be in my proclivity towards all-things-sinus.

That is a very long way of saying I get a sinus infection almost every time my nose drops a drip. I've had so many over my lifetime, in fact, that I've learned how to recover from them without antibiotics. And it isn't any difficult process.

To avoid allowing a sinus infection to progress to the point that I need antibiotics, the only thing I need to do is prevent crud from hanging out in my sinuses. This involves a whole lot of nasty blowing noises, followed by lougie halking noises (are those even words?), a bunch of sleeping completely upright, and usually a very chapped nose. But hey, it works for me. And until recently, I thought it was the only thing that worked. Then I found this:

(This post is about to get ugly, friends)

I would totally not be sharing this with you if I didn't believe that it has prevented not 1, not 2, but 3 sinus infections from taking over my body in the past year. Nobody in their right mind would post vulnerable (read: blackmail-ready) photos such as these without a darn good reason.

The NeilMed bottle is based on the same concept as the (now famous) Neti-pot. The purpose behind them both is to introduce fluid to the sinuses, and invite the mucus to exit with it. In my opinion, the bottle is superior for only one reason: the user can control the rate of flow. Instead of allowing gravity to bring the water out of the neti-pot, into one nostril, and out the other, I can squeeze my little bottle and use a little more force, bringing more of the yuckies out than gravity alone would be able to.

The NeilMed bottle comes with packets of pre-mixed saline solution that dissolve in the warm water used to fill the bottle. Because it has a straw down to the bottom, it needn't be tipped during use.

Simply hold up to one nostril, and while breathing solely through the mouth, squ

eeze the warm saline solution into your sinuses.

The solution, along with whatever it collects on its way out, will exit the opposite nostril.

Continue with the other side,

blowing your nose gently when finished.

Sure. It feels really weird. At first you wonder if you're about to drown yourself. But once you see how much junk that saline solution brings out with it, you, too, will be a believer. Well worth $7.99, especially for those pregnant and nursing who have such limited medicinal choices. Find more information here.

Oh, and if you do decide to give this a try, I may have a couple tips for you. But I'll save the really juice stuff for those who actually want it :)

Tightwad Tuesday: Patience is a virtue (and it usually pays off)

2011-01-18T11:35:00.000-08:00

Where does the time go? Oh wait, I know, there's a time-eating machine sleeping in his crib above me. Check.

Welcome to tightwad Tuesday. I started writing a tightwad-themed Tuesday post a few months ago when I realized that the more I write about the money-saving convictions I have, the better I am at following through with said convictions. Does that resonate with anyone else? It's kinda like a diet, you know? When you tell a bunch of people you're cutting calories and making a

concerted effort to lose weight, you're much more likely to do just that.

Anyway.

It should come as no surprise that there are a lot of things I would like to own. I'm sure you're the same way. Whether it's a hairbrush, or a dresser, a wall painting, or a food processor, we all want something. And it's up to us to decide whether we should buy it, or live without.

But I've found a third option. And it seems to be working swimmingly.

Patience.

What? Yes. Patience. Ok, let me explain. Over the last few months any number of purchasable items have come into my mind. You name it, and I've probably pondered buying it. But instead of heading out to search for the lowest price, or greatest deal, I've written said items on the whiteboard in our kitchen.

See? Some of them are still up there. There were more, but over time I came to the conclusion that I didn't need, or even want, some of them. And yet, some remained. One of those was a George foreman Grill. Yes, B&B, we still have the one you gave us, but honestly, it isn't big enough any more. I began searching out a bigger one a few months ago and kept coming up empty handed - until yesterday.

Yes, it was a quick and unscheduled trip to Goodwill that rewarded my patience with the granddaddy of double sized George Foremans. Would you believe it's hardly been used? Would you also believe it was 50% off, and set us back about $3.27? Indeed, it made for a good buy (and an even better replacement) which will save me oodles of time on dinner prep. We do, after all, use this little appliance 3-4 times weekly on a whole variety of "quick meals" I prepare and stockpile in our freezer.

... but I would be remiss if I didn't point out the potential for such a bargain hunting system to quickly turn into a system for accumulating things we don't need. You know, the "I found such a great deal, I just couldn't resist" stuff. So here is where the buck stops for me:

I will quote the book that I oft. do; "The Complete Tightwad Gazette", by Amy Dacyczyn. In it, a reader submitts a list of buying criteria which I found utterly helpful. It encourages patience, and diligence, and puts to rest haste, and greed. It also facilitates a better understanding of the difference between "want" and "need" - and couldn't we all use a little help in that department?

Can I live without it?
Does it do more than required?
Does it cost more than it's worth?
Can we do what it does with things we already have?
How often will we use it?
Where will we store it?
Will using it be more work than we're apt to want to do?
How many ways can we use it?
Have we checked with people who own one and with consumer ratings?
Would I be smarter to resist, and put the money toward another goal?
If an item doesn't satisfy 8-10 of these criteria, could I at least sell it for the same price I paid (or better) should it fall short of my expectations?

I will add to this list the point "will it save me money, or the equivalent in time doing another task?" When I say equivalent, I'm actually referring to a mathematical equation. What I mean by that is, quite simply, my time is worth money. By doing something like, say, making my own yogurt, I'm saving roughly $3.64 each time I make a half-gallon batch, which takes about 20 minutes of my time. Therefore, I'm "earning" $10.92 per hour of "yogurt making". So, I measure a product's "time saving value" on the value of the time I would spend doing a similar task.

All that rambling to say that USUALLY, it's better to go without buying what first comes to your mind for two reasons: First, if you write it down and wait long enough you'll probably decide that either you don't need it, or that something you have will suffice. Or second, you'll maintain that you do need it and something gently used will turn up when you least expect it.

Why go to all this work? Why bother? Aside from saving money, it comes down to discipline, and stewardship. I want to model both of these for my family, and what better way than to put them into practice, to the very best of my ability.

Sure, my son may be left to play with MY childhood train set, on a table we salvaged from a curbside (both clean, and sturdy, might I add) But maybe, just maybe, that will instill in his little brain the notion that brand new is not essential, that we don't purchase on a whim, and that patience is indeed a virtue.

Christmas:a prologue

2011-01-12T11:55:00.000-08:00

I think I've reached that point where I haven't blogged for so long that I don't know where to begin. So much happened over our Christmas vacation. As is the case with ALL four of my tips home, I learned so much about myself, my family, and my ability to cope with a toddler away from home.I would make a feeble attempt to summarize our visit, but I fear I would end up leaving gaping holes in said summary. Instead, I will slowly fill you in on the key points - over the next week or so. The other reason for stretching it out is that (since we've returned home) Levi isn't taking naps much longer than 75 minutes. Also, my unpacking is FAR from complete. Add to that the fact that we shipped a relocube to ourselves (of things we've been meaning to get from home for many years. great company, great prices, third time we've used them.) and I have very little time on my hands. So, these posts shall have to be short and sweet if I have any desire to actually complete any of them

First, I shall share that on Christmas day my son took a diving leap from the doorway down into the garage at my mothers home (about a 6" step). He landed squarely on his nose. Which might not have been a bad thing, but that little nose skidded on the wipe-your-feet type rug, and he had a nasty rug burn for the following week. He earned the nick-name "faceplant"

That nick name served him well as, not 10 days later, (the very night before we arose at 3:30am to catch our flight back to NE) and in a VERY irritable state, my 19 month old climbed over the side of his (formerly MY) crib, and fell to the floor. Terrible mother that I am, I did not make note of his falling until I went in to check on him 30 minutes later and found him asleep. On the floor. Insert call to pediatrician, mommy tears, and feelings of all-over guilt. Wow.

We met some woodland creatures at my grandfather's home. He feeds them. The return every night. Never in my wildest dreams did I think I'd capture a picture of my toddler THIS CLOSE to a pair of racoons.

Jonathan and I also celebrated our 5 year anniversary with a trip to a local irish pub (similar to one we frequented during our short honeymoon in Victoria BC, 5 years ago) and dessert at the Cheesecake Factory. Nothing like bumming around Downtown Seattle during the holiday season to remind me why I strongly dislike big city traffic. Our anniversary was wonderful - each year when we celebrate together, it reminds me how happy I am we married during the Christmas season. Not only do we get to celebrate the holidays with family, but they get to celebrate our anniversary with us. We have so many fond memories of anniversaries past!

I said earlier that I would make due note of the mistakes we made in our trip TO Seattle by plane. I do not need to use many words to do this. First, DO NOT plan on stretching out a toddler's bedtime during a layover. overtired is never good, and overtired does NOT mix well with benedryl. "nurse, nurse, doze, AWAKEN, SCREAM, ARCH, nurse nurse, doze..." for 3.5 hours. Ick. If you plan to use Benedryl, do what we did on our trip back to NE. Give it right before the plane takes off, and plan your departure during a normal going-to-sleep time.

Since we've been home (what, almost a week now?) we've been the gracious recipients of said relocube, and also (on the same day) 7 inches of snow. I was beginning to think we scared the snow off by purchasing a snow blower before nary a flake fell. Not so. Don't get me wrong, I think the snow is beautiful and all - and by now, I'm pretty darn used to the stuff - but I'm not a fan of traveling around the city in it, nor is my marshmallow-of-a-bundled-up-child. Today's high is negative two. I seized this opportunity to clean out my deep freezer, moving all of its contents to the detached garage while it thawed in our basement. So, you won't catch me saying the cold isn't good for something!

if these photos don't finish uploading soon you're going to have to endure a photo-less post. The child shall wake anon, and when he does, I shall post regardless.

Alright. There's my post, photos included. And there's my waking toddler. Adios.

2010-12-23T12:55:00.001-08:00

Flying with a toddler is rarely as difficult as you think it will be
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Sometimes it's much, much harder.

When I get a little more sleep, and come to terms with the fact that I'm taking my (sleep deprived) toddler to one of the fanciest restaurants in the city tonight, at what would ordinarily be his bed time, I'll blog about yesterday's travel experience.

(this post will be alternately titled "mistakes NOT to make when flying with your toddler")

New do for a little dude

2010-12-17T11:24:00.000-08:00

A couple of nights ago, I took the plunge.

Literally.

I took on the monumental task of cutting my toddler's hair...

In the bathtub.

Although the job didn't get finished there (that took a highchair, curious george, and one zoned-out kid), I did manage to snip the majority of my son's whispy locks inside the confines of the tub - and I also managed to save them!

It may be difficult to tell he even got a trim, but I assure you he did. No more rat-tail for my son, and (after this morning's high-chair episode) no more whispies growing over his ears. All clean and fresh.

Somehow, I thought this would feel like more of a milestone than it does. Hmm... maybe after his first buzz cut.

Not Me Monday

2010-12-17T10:53:00.001-08:00

Some weeks are better than others, eh?

No, I mean really, some weeks you feel like super-mom (or super-dad, or super-employee, or super-spouse...) and some weeks you seriously wonder if you super powers were some sort of sick practical joke.

I started writing "Not-Me Monday" posts thanks to this blogger who has a heart for God, and so much love for her brood of five+hubby. Five? I can hardly keep ONE on the right track.

Here it goes. This one's a doozy, folks.

The week started out with a bang. Tuesday, I took my son downtown where we collected my sister-in-law (darling Jillian, you're priceless) and took her with us to keep and eye on Levi while I got my hair cut. We also went out for pizza! Having been a previous restaurant manager, I know how annoying it is when people walk into your establishment before you're open. So, knowing this, I certainly did NOT mosey in (and out of sub-zero temps) at quarter to eleven. Rude.

Upon returning home, let me be the first to tell you, my garage door was NOT wide open. I'm certain it had NOT been wide open (brand new snow blower and all) for the previous four hours.

Wednesday I had planned to make a meal for a meeting of 25 or so at our church. This has been on my calendar for a while - so I did NOT forget about it when I was reading my facebook feed in the morning and tell my friend (who has three under three) that I would be at the childrens' museum in the morning and more than willing to help her manage her handful. Not me!

While I was cooking up a storm at the church (and my son was playing with his pal Teague) I called to see how things were going at Rachael's house. She certainly did not inform me that my son had a fever of 103.1, and was standing by the sliding glass door pouting "mommeee?" Oh no.

We arrived home. I put my baby down for what I was *sure* would be a long nap. I was NOT wrong about this. Why would I be? I mean, MY son always takes loooooooooong naps. Enjoyable

naps! Knowing how ill he must have felt for having such a high temperature, I did not try to drag him to walmart (oh come on! you know you do this too when your kids take super-short naps. What else was I going to do with him?). On our way out the door my ever-independent son, who likes to navigate the stoop steps on his own did not get his fingers pinched in the door jam by yours truly. I also did not ad insult to injury by smacking his head on the side of the car whilst trying to get him into his rear facing car seat. I'm super mom, remember?

I did NOT continue feeling like a poor excuse for a caregiver... now.

Ok, so we get to walmart without too much trouble, and we're strolling through the store picking up a couple things on our list. As we made our way from the food section of the store to the home-repair section it was NOT my son who took ONE glance at the lingerie we passed by and,

without hesitation, looked me dead in the face, and with head cocked to the right, said "Milk?"

Oh gee my little nursling.

A few more before I look like a complete idiot... stay tuned

My son is learning shapes. And colors. and, of all things, matching (which he initiated, and I'll have to explain this further later). So he'll point out anything that looks like, say, a ball. He and I were snuggling after nap one day at which point he did NOT point to a small, raised, mole on my face and say "ball?" (Really?)

He did not then do the same thing to the (much larger) mole on his daddy's knee - and that most certainly did NOT make me feel just a little bit better.

And lastly, in my plight to offer my son a few more dosing moments during nap time (and being SICK of this short-nap business), I have been giving him a little motrin before he goes down. Well, the pediatrician wondered if he may have a sore throat and she suggested a little robitussen. Having gone back and forth between the two of these throughout the week (and seeing zero result in the form of more sleep from either of them), I would NOT have been the one to prop my toddler on my hip, and with both bottles in front of me, ASK him which one he wanted. He also would NOT have said something that sounded like "Morin".

He did NOT then go on to take a splendid 3 hour nap.

That's all I got folks. OK, lie. I have more notes here pertaining to other stupid things I did and said over the past week, but I don't have any need to degrade myself further.

...except to say that I might have put my son's potty chair on top of my own in an attempt to get him to stay on it for one solitary minute. Maybe I did that. But I'm just not sure.

Hum Drum Rut (and a map)

2010-12-16T13:14:00.001-08:00

Do you ever feel yourself falling into a rut? You know, a routine that, without you even noticing, turns from "ideal" to "monotonous"? Well, I think We're there. Not to say we aren't enjoying our rut, I think we are doing just that - but it's offering very little variety lately.I suppose this is somewhat both normal and necessary. Children thrive with routine yes? I'm willing to bet the only difference between a healthy routine (which, I would imagine, includes a healthy dose of variety) and what we've got going right now is laziness and my outright desire not to make any endeavor that may require too much energy from me. I'm short on that. Energy. You know how that goes.

aaaaaaaany way. Levi is sick. He came down with a spontanious fever yesterday (while my friend Rachael was watching him for me. Teague, you're next) My firecracker has decided sleeping is most certainly NOT the way to get well, and as such has taken a sabatical from regular naps. Ugh.

Also, and completely unrelated to anything I just said, I logged on to google analytics (a program I am not very familiar with at all) and realized that, to my shock, my blog has been visited by individuals in over 20 countries in the past 8 months. Go figure! If you're unfamiliar with Google analytics, and you fear I'm trying to track down whose who, fear not, that's not the way the program works. At least, I don't think that's the way it works - and even if it is, I have no idea how to see exactly *who* went looking on my blog. Only where they were from in the world, and how long they stayed here etc. So, stalk on, my unknown Korean friend. And you, yes, you from Turkey, I know you're out there!

(dark green = most visits, light green = few visits, White = no visits)

I've used it before, and I'll use it again - my only excuse for excluding from this post a (current) picture of my darling son is that my camera is upstairs. Between it and me lie whoknowshowmany creaky floor boards and one napping toddler. Instead, this profile shot will have to suffice.

(all the obedient toddlers were painting their gingerbread men with green icing. Meanwhile, Levi was busily painting the inner reaches of Teague's mouth with sweet, sugary, goodness. That's my boy!)

Sneak Peek...

2010-12-10T18:52:00.000-08:00

...mostly because they won't arrive until we're in Seattle, and although I'm having them shipped directly there, I won't be able to get them to most of you until AFTER Christmas. So, here it is, our 2010 Christmas card

Yes. It's a very small PNG. The text reads "Merry Christmas From the Hnosko Family. Jonathan, Melissa, & Levi.

And a very Merry Christmas it shall be - in just 15 days!

Confession: I'm a blogger on a budget

2010-12-07T12:23:00.000-08:00

"no, really?" you say rhetorically.

yes, and so it may come as no surprise to you I'm finding it difficult to shell out dollar after dollar to write, print off, and send my traditionally hilarious and simultaneously informative Christmas Letter.

I neglected to write such a letter last year - thinking that a 6 month old and a fresh recovery from a terrific bout of post partum depression were excuse enough. But this year, well, I'm afraid my excuses have run out.

That, and my son is so dog gone adorable, I'd be crazy not to share him with the world. Thanks to our dear friend [and, ahem, professional photographer in the making] Marilena, we have oodles of fantastic photos to share...

and that's just a sneak peak - there are MANY more that she snapped when she was here at our place just as the leaves started to turn. The woman has MAD talent, let me tell you.

So as I was going back and fourth about whether or not to break the bank, I found this promotion Shutterfly was running, and it sealed the deal.

But I need your help. I'm terrible at making artistically sound decisions. As I've been looking through the (astronomical number of) card options Shutterfly has this year, I have to say this card jumped out at me (maybe because it has a giant "H" in the top left corner). I also really like this one. Way more understated, but sometimes simple is nice. But then there's this one and - I'm overwhelmed. Do you see one you like?

Then again, even if I do manage to settle on a card choice, I may have so much difficulty narrowing down my photo options I may just have to send out some of these...

When we did announcement photo cards after Levi was born we went with one (very similar to this) that had a lot of pictures above and below two understated lines of text, I loved it. Maybe because it was heavy on pictures and light on text - after all, when you have a son as cute as mine, nobody cares what the words say. I may as well send one of these of my son to everyone, forget the "here's what we did this year" business, and call it good.

Every year (we call it our "anniversary gift" to each other since our anniversary is on the 29th) Jonathan and I order a photo book from Shutterfly that chronicles the previous year. Why? well, in simple terms, I'm NO GOOD at scrapbooking. Their photo books are nothing short of awesome, and also quite simple to create. The two we currently own are treasured - to illustrate that further, I should point out they are stored on a very high shelf to keep little fingers FAR AWAY.

Oh, I know what your'e thinking now. And you're smart to consider it. "ok, so she's finagled free Christmas cards, but to send them she'll spend minimum $22 - and that's without purchasing envelopes." Fear not, friends, I have a plan. You see, I figure I'll be able to GIVE at least half of these to their intended recipients in person. I mean, seriously, we're already spending umpteen dollars to fly half way across the country where the vast majority of everybody we know lives. Why couldn't I just hand them out? So, that's the plan. Which leaves me with about $12 in stamps to buy. Not bad for such a venture, I say.

And you? How's your Christmas card coming along?

Tightwad Tuesday

2010-12-07T11:28:00.000-08:00

Why do I never find time to blog anymore... used to be a daily occurrence. I suppose that's a good thing though - it should mean I'm spending more time doing other things and less time staring at my screen - but two blogs a week 'aint bad, if you ask me.

Anyway...

Here's the nugget I've been thinking on this week. By now, you all know that Jonathan and I are making conscious decisions to save more and spend less. We've made lots of (small) changes and (small) sacrifices to do so. And yet, I think Jonathan would even agree with me here, neither of us feels deprived in any way. If anything, we feel less stress overall simply because we know we're slowly making our way towards our common goal: Wealth by way of frugality.

What? Excuse me?

Let me explain. I'll use a quote from my new favorite book* to illustrate my point.

"...most Americans are confused about the relationship between frugality and wealth. This confusion has a profound impact on how Americans spend. Because we think frugality has to do with being poor, we see it as an admission of economic failure. We think only poor people bring home a good find from the dump [or, in our case, the curb], and only poor people cut their own kids' hair [or, in our case, make our own yogurt and crackers for sack lunches]."

"Because we don't want to be seen as economic failures, we spend our money the way we mistakenly think the wealthy do - usually on day-to-day extravagances. We feel good, because briefly, we've made people think we are wealthier than we are. If we do it often enough, we may even fool ourselves along with our neighbors."

"It is true that most wealthy people buy a few more luxuries than do poor people, but the total percentage of income they spend on extravagances is extremely small. Consequently, a person with a low income and a wealthy attitude would live as modestly as possible to create maximum surplus to save and invest. Poor people often remain poor because they spend any surplus income on short term gratification"

*The Complete Tightwad Gazette, Amy Dacyczyn, 1998

No no, friends, we aren't going for riches here. But, darn it, I was tired of living paycheck to paycheck. Also, "wealth" to me represents the ability to stay home with my son and not bring in an income. So, we're making lifestyle changes that, yes, make more hands-on work for me, but also allow us to add to our emergency fund, meanwhile totally reducing my worry factor over our financial state.

Another key point I wanted to add came from the sermon our pastor preached this past Sunday. Wonderful message, but for the life of me I can't remember exactly which point it was that fit with what I've already said. I've been listening through the sermon again (on James, 5:1-12, speaking to "the rich") and still can't pick it out. Suffice it to say, we ALL fall into the category James would have described as "the rich". And we should all heed his warning to the rich because before we know it, in the twinkling of an eye, Christ will return. And do you know what he is going to want to know?

"What did you do with what I gave you? Your time, your talents, and your treasures?"

And that point resonates with me. On that glorious day when I meet Jesus face to face, I want to be able to know that I used what I was entrusted with responsibly. I did not spend wastefully. I did not pilfer it away. I did not hoard, and become greedy. I did not build up my treasure on earth, buying stuff and more stuff and more stuff, to make me happy, and to give me a false sense of worth. On the day that I am held accountable for how I used my what I was given, I want it to be said of me "well done!". Because on that day, there will not be any more" tomorrows" to which I could promise I would invest in His Kingdom, and wisely employ what He entrusted to me.

And so it is with that in mind that I try to humbly remember none of this is my own. Not my family, not my stuff, and certainly not my money. And as such, frugality and humble living is as much my responsibility to God as it is my means to be a stay-at-home mother. It is a means to both ends.

Wealth. Frugality. Obedience.

They go hand-in-hand-in-hand.

A few of my favorite things

2010-12-03T11:15:00.000-08:00

I could write a long list of my favorite things... or I could just mention that many of them are sold at one place. I may not have been there, waiting with my nose smooshed against the glass at 8:00 this morning for the grand opening...

But I was there less than two hours later thankyouverymuch.

Trader Joes - I have been waiting to have one locally for TEN YEARS.

And today, well, today changes everything.

NOT ME Monday

2010-11-29T11:34:00.000-08:00

Oye, what a week. I mean, a marvalous one, but WHAT A week. Holiday, husband home from work, baby's routine all out-a-whack, too much food and too little sleep - you know the type.

But among the many happy moments in my Thanksgiving week, there were some that were more than slightly irritating - and you know me, I always respond in the best, most polite way possible when irritated. I never lose my cool, and I have more patience than anyone you know.

In fact, it was with that very polite attitude of mine that I responded when I realized I hadn't a single egg in the house with which to make a pumpkin pie. On Thanksgiving Eve. Me? Forget eggs? Never.

It was Not me, mind you, who made Thanksgiving stuffing that was entirely too dry a couple of years ago. And therefore, it was not our dear neighbors who refrained from asking me to make it last year. It was also not my dear neighbor's husband (affectionately known as Levi's adopted grandpa) who, forgetting I had made that stuffing two years ago, reminded everyone of how dry it was. As such, it was NOT ME who, after being asked politely to give stuffing another try this year, made it TOO MOIST. I didn't even know that was possible.

Did you follow that? I sure hope so.

It is NOT my child (get a load of this one) who has recently discovered (ready for the gross-out factor?) his rectum. Yes, his anus. During each and every diaper change I wouldn't dare be caught saying "Levi, do not put your finger in your rectum" NOT ME! that's gross. Seriously GROSS!

In a stroke of blind faith, it is not me who has been giving my dairy sensitive toddler 4-8oz of cows milk, daily, for the past week. Oh no, I know full well what kind of problems that can cause. I've SEEN THEM. Weeks of diarrhea can be the eventual result of ONE SIP of cow's milk - why on EARTH would I give him more than that. Better question: How in the world can it be true that he's actually tolerating it? Go figure.

Feeling guilty about our expenditures on disposable items, I did not recently sew a new set of baby-wipes out of two old, donated blankets. I mean, you've heard me say RIGHT HERE that I don't want to use cloth wipes (because I don't like poop going into my washer, it is for that very reason I rinse all my diapers. Yes, yes, I know I could "rinse" my wipes too, but that's taking it a step too far people). I did, however, come up with a plan I think might work. I'll let you know.

Lastly, in the veritable abundance of free time I have, I did NOT recently take up yeast-bread-making as a hobby. I have not recently found it therapeutic to bake fresh bread, after fresh bread, after fresh bread. Nor have I been boning up on my baking science so as to use the least amount of yeast possible, while maintaining a strong flavor. Christine Boothman, this one's for you:

Wordless Wednesday

2010-11-24T12:31:00.001-08:00

Tightwad Tuesday

2010-11-23T11:39:00.001-08:00

I'll continue in this vein, because it's on my mind.

As I'm thumbing through this tightwad book I keep mentioning, one theme seems to permeate many of its pages. It's a theme I've had at the forefront of my mind this week - and maybe you can relate. First, a little background into why this theme is so relevant to me...

I don't know when it started really, but I'll take a stab in the dark and guess it was probably college. I lived in dorms. I had very very little space, and even less money. I surmised that the things I would buy while in college wouldn't need to last me beyond college - and for the most part, I was right. I shopped primarily at Walmart for any non-food item I would need, and that was that.

Every piece of furniture I bought was made of particle board. Every electronic item (save my laptop) was bottom-of-the-line. Virtually everything I bought was cheap. I don't mean to say it was all inexpensive (although most of it was that, too) I mean it was cheap. You know, cheap quality.

Knowing in the very very back of my mind that these things were cheap, I had no expectation that they would last a really long time. And I treated them as such. Without my even knowing it, or paying attention, this way of buying followed me (or us, I should say) on into marriage and adulthood. After all, we've never really been "rolling in dough", so we've always tried to buy inexpensive things. And what did that leave us with? You got it: A collection of things that don't hold up to long-term use, and a long list of things that need replacing.

Which brings me to the theme running throughout the book I'm reading: Buy good quality things, and take excellent care of them.

For us, that means we are going to start saving to buy the higher quality choice within the category of items we're looking for. Why? because it will save us money in the long run. I need to get this idea of "temporary stuff" out of my cheap brain. Living frugally means so much more than spending less money - it means getting MORE for the money you spend.

Note that I did not say buying quality things means buying expensive things. Sometimes the higher quality item can be found used - which, in some cases, would still last longer than a lower-quality new item. Do you get where I'm going with this?

Note that I also mentioned taking good care of the high-quality things you buy. Taking impeccable care of a low quality item may actually be equivalent to, if not better than, taking poor care of a high quality item. I'll use one of my own possessions as an example...

Last year we bought a humidifier for Levi's room. It was a nice one - I got it at Walgreens. It was not top of the line, it was a generic, but I'd say it was a nice one. We used it every single night in Levi's room throughout the winter last year. Then what did we do? we left it in his room, full of water, all throughout the summer. Mold grew in it. I would look at it every-so-often and think "you know, I should really try to clean that", at which point I would decide that it would take too much time and effort. After all, it called for "distilled water", a requirement we never took seriously, and I figured I had probably ruined it long ago. And I had. In all honestly, it would have been better for us to have purchased a cheap humidifier, if we were going to ruin it. We would have saved some money.

This winter we purchased an equally nice humidifier with a filter. It does not require distilled water. Needless to say, I plan to care for this one very well. I intend for it to last us many winters. Speaking of winters, we are also considering the purchase of a snow-blower. As per our most recent "ah-ha", we plan to buy a nice one, with a good track record, and a good warrantee - and not settle for the cheapest workable option we can find. If it lasts, it will more than pay for itself in the time and energy necessary to remove snow from a long driveway and sidewalk year after year after year - or however long we're in Nebraska.

Please don't take this post as anything more than a reasonably-new-mother trying to get her thoughts out. If anything, I'm preaching to myself. Take from it what you want, but there's nothing I'm trying to convince you of. You don't need my convincing.

So, Your thoughts?

a post about weaning and breastfeeding (fair warning)

2010-11-22T12:20:00.001-08:00

I feel conflicted.

Happy, and yet sad at the very same time - you might almost say the feeling is bittersweet.

Today, for the first time ever, my toddler did not ask to nurse upon waking.

"what's the big deal?" you say. "He's 18 months old for heavens' sake, you're practically nursing a preschooler." you say. Well, you see, that's the crux of my issue today. He IS eighteen months old (next week). And this IS normal and natural weaning behavior. But I have some serious decisions to make.

Ever since we (Levi and I) finally got nursing figured out - finally nursed exclusively at 4 months - finally adjusted to intolerances - ever since then I've nursed him on demand. Meaning, any time he asks. Why? because I could. I spent 4 months feeling like I couldn't, and now I CAN. Along with that came my decision to follow a plan of "child lead weaning", meaning allowing Levi to cut me off, versus the other way around. And I was, and still am, fine with that plan. But as I am coming to find out it is not all that cut and dry. I have to make some decisions, I have to decide where to draw the line. I have to (as my mother would say) "Make my choice, and love my choice", because once I make it, I have to stick with it.

What choice is there to make? Well, in simple terms I need to decide whether or not, if he "forgets" to nurse at a regular nursing time, I am going to nurse him, say, an hour later when he remembers or gets bored. That may sound like an easily answered question - but I'm vexed.

If I choose to nurse him whenever he likes (i.e., on demand), I'm most certainly following my "plan", so to speak, of child led weaning. At the same time though I wonder if I should limit nursing to a specific place, and/or specific times. If I do set boundaries he is almost sure to completely wean in a matter of months - and I'm just not sure I'm ready for that.

Oh, I think I'd be ready for it if HE initiated his own weaning. I think I'd be ready for it if HE (without my having to set boundaries, or having to refuse him, or having to redirect him as I did this morning as we were leaving the house and he REMEMBERED he hadn't nursed) decided he was done. But for me to step in and push him away? I just don't know if I can...

Nursing my toddler to a state of almost-sleep each night, watching his heavy eyelids droop closed in my arms - it's the most precious thing in the world. I find it absolutely adoring that knows when to unlatch and ask for the "other side"(in words that sound more like "uh-sigh") - and to actively keep it from him would be very very hard for this mommy - indeed, very difficult.

...and yet there are times where I'm SO DONE. There are times where my toddler is cranky and snarky, and bored, hanging on my ankle (when I OBVIOUSLY need to get some work done!) looking up at me and crying "MUH???" (which means milk). And all I want is for ME not to be the only thing he wants at that VERY moment. Sheesh!

So, which feeling is stronger? That's the question of the day. Do I draw a line, and if so, where? Do I set boundaries, and if so, where?

No, this is not one of those posts where I eventually come to a conclusion. In case you were waiting for that. Sorry. Stay tuned. And leave your thoughts.

Tightwad Tuesday

2010-11-16T11:26:00.000-08:00

I'm a tightwad at heart. Surprised much?

Didn't think so.

I've recently been reading a book by Amy Dacyczyn called "The Complete Tightwad Gazette". It's actually a compilation of three books, which are compilations of many little newsletters Amy wrote throughout the 90's. At first I found it hard to believe anything she would have to say could possibly be relevant today, 15-20 years later, but it is. It seriously is. And if the saying can transfer from things theological, to things thightwad-ological: I feel convicted!

This woman is serious. She means business. washing and re-using ziplocks is just the tip of the iceberg. In reading her book I have been asked to lay aside my previously held notions of money's value. Page by page she gives me not only ideas for keeping just one penny more, but also reality checks regarding my standards of living, and the hold that "keeping up with the Jonses" has on my life.

There are a number of things I've learned from this book - and a few I already knew, had already employed, and simply needed to tweak. Below are some of the recent changes we've made in order to stretch our dollars.

Set a goal: put money into savings each month. At least something. Shouldn't be difficult if we follow through on everything else below.
Pull 20 fewer dollars out of the ATM each week for consumables. As Amy reminded me, it's NOT about how much you save in coupons and ad matches - it's about how much you end up spending.
Quit buying junkie crap that falls apart. Start saving to buy quality goods that won't need replacing. You get what you pay for.
Stay away from convenience foods as much as possible at the grocery store. Chips, crackers, canned goods (besides veggies, fruits & tuna), anything in an individual serving, anything that can conceivably be made at home (would you believe I made wheat thins yesterday? oh yes, yes I did).
Refinance our home at a lower interest rate (done. Closed last Friday. went from 5.8 to 4.375 for a savings of about $100/month)

But why? Why do all this work? I mean, aside from our mortgage, we aren't in any debt. Why wouldn't we just spend what we've worked hard to earn? We've worked HARD for it after all. Shouldn't we enjoy that money?

Well, yes. But that enjoyment may be more long term than short term. I'd much rather "enjoy" my children getting a college education tomorrow than Jonathan and I having a larger home today. I'd much rather "enjoy" my years of retirement tomorrow than a vacation today. I'd much rather "enjoy" being able to stay home with my kids tomorrow than have new furniture today (did I mention we went curb scouting Sunday? found some neat free furniture!) Although I'll be the first to admit that these values have been difficult for me to enforce, the outcomes of their enforcement are well worth their effort.

I'm preaching to myself. Can you tell?

Sometimes I need a reminder of why I'm "going to the trouble" so to speak. It is worth it, it really, really is.

And, let me tell you, I am ridiculously lucky to have a husband who believes that. Otherwise I'm afraid he may think me certifiable.

From Generation to Generation

2010-11-12T11:35:00.000-08:00

Goodbye Grandma,

See you on the other side of Glory!

Heredity strikes again

2010-11-10T12:36:00.000-08:00

I took Levi to the Ped. yesterday and, as it turns out, he has yet another sinus infection. I think my friend Rachael put it best when she said "what are they going to do about recurrent sinus infections? give him sinus tubes?" Alas, there is no such relief for babies with angry sinuses, as there is for babies with angry ears.

No, Levi came by his sinuses, and their proclivity toward becoming infected) honestly. His mommy and granddad, and great granddad are all big time sufferers of sinusitis. Sad, but true.

(Proclivity: that one's for you, Rachael Blaske)

So, here we go on another round of Antibiotics. Gosh I hate Antibiotics. As if having to take the darn medicine every day wasn't enough, it also gives my dear toddler the craps. Nice.

After two nights of restless and interrupted sleep (please refer above to sick toddler, and add to that a week of cheesemaking and therefore middle-of-the-night-heading-to-work for hubby) I am in a particularly grumpy mood. It's hard to be productive when one is grumpy, let alone feel good about anything one may have accomplished, whilst grumpy. Hmph.

Here's to a better night, tonight.

My morning, in photos

2010-11-09T11:42:00.000-08:00

I was up with this goofy little boy a few times last night. He awoke near midnight in need of a little pat on the back. Then hubby left for work sometime around 2am. Near 2:30 Levi awoke again this time soaked from the diaper down (why do kids hold their pee until there's a gallon of it to let go of? I don't get it.). He was also burning up (as has been the trend of the past few days, we go to the Ped. this afternoon). I gave him more motrin and put him back down.

He was whining again at 6 - a waking I rolled over and ignored - and then at 7 for the day. We're both a little tired and worn out from the eventful night. Fortunately, he's not too tired to pull out mommy's clothes and play dress-up. Goof. My only regret of the morning is not catching him in this get-up while he was also wearing his bright orange sunglasses - which he only recently figured out how to correctly put on by himself.

Upon returning home from a lovely lunch with my sis-in-law Jillian (we went for pizza to Yia Yia's, and then to the Cookie Company for a delectable treat) I found this turn-cock leaking water on the floor of our laundry room. It's a very slow (and very annoying) drip. The connection point there is that of the water supply (pipe) to the humidifier line. If anybody has any advice about how to tackle this without flooding my basement, I'd be happy to hear it.

Amid the morning shuffle I had a delightful cup of coffee in this, my brand new mug. Would you believe that I made this mug? I did. It's true. But don't ask me to repeat the creative genius, I don't perform well under pressure.

Not me - Thursday?

2010-11-04T05:43:00.001-07:00

Stop the presses! I'm blogging before NOON!

Ok, quell your excitement. Here we go...

Because I completely forgot about NOT ME Monday (started by this fantastic blogger), I have a few things to share - unfortunately.

this is going to be one of my more embarrassing not-me posts. get ready.

I've been washing diapers ALL WEEK. Diapers are Stinky (surprised much?) So it was NOT ME who simply assumed that the mild smelliness of my laundry room was due to washer buildup of stinkies. Therefore it was also not me who went hog wild trying to clean out my washing machine. Tide washer cleaner, vinegar, some other brand of washer cleaner, Hot rinse, Hot rinse, Hot rinse... On Wednesday morning it was NOT me who found a bag of totally nasty, liquefied, rotten potatoes across the room from my washing machine on my pantry shelves. Nope, not me. Gross.

After hearing Hy-Vee was having a sale on milk (.99 per half gallon, Wed. only) of course I went on down. I picked up my four allowed half gallons and also picked up a piece of pizza dough ($2.00, in case you were interested, and they roll it out and put it on a free disposable foil pan for you. Totally worth it). An elderly gentleman in front of me at the check-out noticed my pizza dough and commented that he didn't know you could buy just dough. Not surprising, not very many people know. He purchased his own 3 half gallons, and then walked over to the pizza kitchen to pick up his own piece of dough. So, after I made my purchases, it was NOT ME who accidentally (I SWEAR) walked off with HIS already-paid-for milk (which he had left sitting on the counter while he quickly grabbed some pizza dough) along with my own. No. I wouldn't do that. And if I did, I certainly would have noticed before I got home and loaded it into the freezer and wondered aloud "why in he world do I have so much milk?" I'm not a thief, not me!

As I was leaving Hy-Vee, headed to East campus to visit hubby, I most certainly not have to PULL OVER, already having driven HALF way there because I realized that I did not buckle my son into his seatbelt. No, I always make sure his 5 point, rear facing car-seat is properly buckled before I pull out of my parking space.

Lastly, I made a bundt cake yesterday in expectation of some wonderful visitors that came to play yesterday morning. The recipe called for cinnamon, which I thought I was almost out of. Until I found a little ziplock baggie of it. This is not surprising to me as I have a LOT of ziplock baggies of cinnamon after we purchased a large amount of it in Venezuela in 2007. So, I dutifully added the measured cinnamon to my mixerbowl, measuring it straight out of the bag. After my cake was fully mixed, poured, and in the oven, it was NOT ME who smelled the bag of "cinnamon" only to discover that it was not cinnamon at all, but rather cocoa powder. Nope, I pay far too much attention to detail for that.

As an aside, it was also not me that buckled my son into his highchair while I made said cake, and put cartoons on for him. I would never do that. I care WAY too much about my child's developing mind to EVER plop him in front of the TV to entertain him. Oh, and I certainly don't do this EVERY day during his lunch time. No no, not me.

Just Do It

2010-11-02T12:42:00.000-07:00

Did you?

(Did I what?)

Oh come on, you know.

So, did you?

(no really, I don't get it, did I what?)

You know, your duty, your CIVIC duty, your duty as a CITIZEN...

I know you have at least a few political opinions - opinions that you may not care to share, but opinions none-the-less.

I know you give an occasional annoyed glance at those facebook friends of yours who are always updating their politically charged statuses. While you may have already "hid" them from your feed, I know you care, deep down.

SO GO DO IT.

Do it so you have a basis upon which to complain (should you feel the need to).

Do it because you CAN; legally that is.

Do it to set a good example for you children - or your parents - or your neighbors - or anyone else who might see your "I did it" sticker.

(do it for 15 solitary minutes away from whatever you usually spend that time doing)

Do it because, face it, you really are running low on excuses not to, and shouldn't you save those for a time when you seriously need them?

Do it because even if you don't care about the political climate right now, even if you "don't know who to vote for", even if politics "isn't your thing", there will come a time this year when you'll want to say you had a say.

So go do it. Now.

Nebraska voters: go here to find your polling place and here for a voters guide

Washington voters: go here to find your polling place and here for a voters guide

My ticker

2010-10-29T11:45:00.000-07:00

So in my effort to find more ways in which I can be ~~ridiculously cheap~~ studiously thrifty, I've started trying to pay attention to any areas where I may be thoughtlessly spending - that is to say, areas where I'm spending without really thinking about it. And it wasn't until recently that I had (what my dear husband would call) an "apostrophe!" (also known in the english speaking world as a epiphany! Ready? Here it comes.

Wait for it...

I spend a TON of money on things we turn right around and Throw.a.way.

Like what? Well, I'll give you some examples:

trash bags
paper towels
sandwich baggies
freezer ziplocks
baby wipes
dishwasher detergent
laundry detergent
hand soap
dish soap

Now, of course, each of these items has a use prior to it's disposal. Let's not forget for a moment that paper towels have HUGE value in my home. I GREATLY appreciate my ability to grab

one and wipe off my jelly covered child. Likewize, hand soap is very useful...

But the point I'm getting at is that these are things which we use - and then they are gone. These things are - da da da DA - Consumables.

And so I should be carefully watching my "spending" not only ON these items, but OF these items. (yes, this is self talk. I know you aren't stupid, you probably already had this figured out. I just need to get it out of my brain by way of my fingertips so it will STICK in my head)

So in order to get my consumables-spending (the amount of consumables I use in a day, not the number of dollars I spend on them - that's a closely related topic for another day) under control, I've come up with a concept - a word picture - That gets me thinking. I picture a digital ticker above my head. Every time I use something (something that will be DONE once I use it) That digital display ads to it the cost of that item.

Think about it - each paper towel, each baby wipe, each ziplock, dryer sheet, ounce of detergent, drop of dish soap - they all have a price.

By the end of an entire year I'm willing to bet I've "consumed" hundreds of dollars in consumables, most of which benefit me only in the sense that they save me time. And I'm not discounting that. Time is valuable. MY TIME is valuable. There are SOME things that are totally worth the money for saving my time. Disposable baby wipes would most certainly fall into this category. (This is where I could explain why, but you don't want the dirty details, believe you me. Suffice it to say I MADE MY OWN cloth wipes, and now they function as rags because I AM DONE using cloth wipes. Ahem.) Trash bags are another of these things, because there's no way I have either the time, energy, or desire to compost and recycle EVERY piece of trash we produce.

Maybe, like me, you're pinching your pennies. If that's the case, I encourage you to take a hard look at the things you consume on a daily basis (no, not food, silly. Yet another related topic for another day). Small changes add up to BIG change - our small change for the week is placing a stack of those under-utilized cloth baby wipes next to our paper towel dispenser. I'm going to do my best to grab one of those when I need to wipe up a quick mess, instead of grabbing something I'm just going to throw away.

What are you going to do?

Not-so-wordless Thursday

2010-10-28T11:18:00.002-07:00

(room for a friend)

(Here's lookin' at you, kid)

(Halloween costume = meltdown in 3-2-1...)

(Dining with Daddy)

(Drive through leftovers? Not without a scolding.)

Let me sing

2010-10-26T12:33:00.000-07:00

I've loved singing since I was a child.

I'm not sure I've ever been very good at it, but I thoroughly enjoy making music.

These are the lyrics to the chorus of a song that a friend introduced me to in college. Later, I sang it in front of our church in Pullman, WA. They're powerful lyrics to me, and maybe that's due in part to the point I was at in my life when they made their impression, but the song still resonates with me - it's words bring me back to some of my most formative college years.

So let me sing for the love Let me love for the lost Let me lose all I have For what I found on the cross Let me trust you with my life Let me live to give you praise Lord, let me praise you For the grace by which I'm saved Lord, let me sing

"Let me sing" from album "Clear to Venus" by Andrew Peterson 2003

Do songs ever do that to you? Take you back to different points in your life, different challenges and struggles? Music memories, to me, are similar to how a taste can remind me of a very specific Thanksgiving dinner, or how a particular smell can take me back to the birth of my son.

Powerful, those memories. Powerful.

Appliances

2010-10-25T12:50:00.000-07:00

If you own any appliances - you know, like a washer, dryer, dishwasher, refrigerator, furnace, hot water heater, or any of the like - you know they ALL have a reputation for one thing:

Breaking.

Plain and simple. You know it, I know it, we all know it. And in OUR family, about half of those things have had, shall we say, "issues", since we moved into our home two and a half years ago. As home owners it just comes with the territory, but these events lead me to wonder why I didn't take the utilities company up on their "appliance insurance". ah well, lesson learned.

Anyway, Our washer has had a few problems lately. I may or may not have previously mentioned that it would intermittently give me cold water when it was set to hot, and vise versa. Well, after putting it off for nearly a century (or 6 months) I finally called someone to come take a look at it. They were the same guys that I called when our refrigerator had "issues" over a year ago. Did I blog about that? Don't remember - but if I did I'll link up to it when I'm done writing here (nap time is precious and I'm not going to go wasting the last wee bit of it searching for a blog post that I may or may not have written.

So, I called these guys, and they came and fixed my washer. After they left, I began to notice (that day, actually) that the selector knob was - how shall I say - slipping. It wasn't turning normally. You'd really have to be here so I could show you what it was doing, but that really isn't the point of my post. So, knowing that my "service charge" was good for 30 days, I called the appliance guys again and told them of my predicament. I mentioned that the problem began just after they left - not that they were the reason for the problem, but that maybe the knob hadn't been tightened down after they put my washer back together (they took the cover off after all).

There was a gentleman on my porch in, I kid you not, 15 minutes. Although I assumed this was a simple issue (like I said, maybe the knob just wasn't tightened down) I was wrong. Turns out the gears were worn down and the "timer" dohicky needs replacing completely.

My face went blank.

I mean, I know things come in threes, but seriously? TWO washer repair bills along with my root canal and various asundried other totally random bills in the SAME 30 days???

And then Troy, from Appliance Technology, informed me that they would be making this necessary repair for free. Including the part. Free.

And this, my friends, is why I am writing this blog post. Should you ever have the need for appliance repair, I have the guys for you. Not only did they work tirelessly on my refrigerator a year ago (a task which took a few weeks and a lot of problem-hunting) They are also reminding me of their commitment of quality service with integrity by fixing my washer.

Appliance Technology

3743 N 63rd St

Lincoln, NE 68507-1808

(402) 467-4966

There you go, friends. I realize that none of this post is particularly helpful to those of you who don't live in Lincoln, but I couldn't end my day without giving these guys (who represent a small, local, family owned business) some mad props. Very helpful, considerate, professional, and above all, honest.

And isn't that what we're all looking for in any repair-person? Honesty? I tend to think so.

(update: no, I never blogged about how our refrigerator fritzed out on us three times in 2009. I was away during my post-partum-depression blogging hiatus. Things were a little hairy from June to October 2009, I'm not gonna lie!)

Wordless Wednesday - er - Thursday

2010-10-21T12:54:00.001-07:00

(in case none of you finds it interesting to see my son cover himself in home made yogurt, I should tell you that up until very recently he has been allergic to all things dairy. These pictures mark a HUGE event in our home - and Levi couldn't be happier.

Something I will post more about later

2010-10-20T13:04:00.000-07:00

So I sat down at the computer yesterday afternoon with a LOT on my mind. I have recently been struck with just how critical and judgemental of a person I am and after Tuesday morning bible study (MUMS) at Berean I really wanted to write down all of my icky feelings so I wouldn't forget them.

Do you ever do that? Write thoughts and feelings and "ah-hah" moments down so you don't forget and then continue on in your normal ways? Anyway...

I wrote a LONG LONG LONG post that didn't really seem to be going anywhere and, in the end, I didn't publish it. I saved it.

Criticism, critical opinionated eye rolls, and even in some part critical thoughts about how others choose to do things, are hurtful. ("choose to do things" could easily be expanded to include "choose to act/own/buy/wear/work/etc etc) Whether I realized it or not, I'm quite sure that the scoffs of "seriously?" under my breath have often been recognized.

So my question is, why do my thoughts so quickly become critical and judgmental? Initially I would wonder if I feel insecure deep down and have some inborn need to justify my actions etc. - but while I'm sure that's true for some of the areas in my life, I think there's more to it than that.

Anyway, more on this later. As I continue to search it out myself.

A simple Autumn treat my kid will actually eat

2010-10-20T11:29:00.000-07:00

I found this recipe recently in an issue of Parents Magazine. Levi Loves it. Jonathan begs for it. and it has 5 ingredients. Sounds like a win, win, win.

Oh, and it's cheap. Make that a win, win, win, win.

Shortcut Pumpkin Bread

Yellow cake mix (we use Best Choice/super-saver brand which is dairy/soy free)

The eggs and oil the mix calls for

One cup pureed pumpkin

One cup mashed banana

Mix all ingredients together well

Pour into a greased loaf pan

bake at 375 for 50 minutes

Presto! Pumpkin bread.

Now, for the fine print - I actually add chocolate chips to mine. Call me a rebel, but if you want the truth they come by Jonathan's insistence. So don't blame me.

NOT ME Monday

2010-10-18T11:46:00.000-07:00

"Not Me Monday" was started by this blogger, whose posts I adore reading. I don't think she did a "not me" post this week, but whatever she wrote I assure you it's worth reading.

Ok, on to the not me-ing.

Let's start with an obvious one. I did NOT seriously neglect my blog over the past couple of weeks as Levi has shifted from two naps to one. You know me better than that. You know that I'm a highly organized individual who always has a spare moment (AND the mental faculties) to write something coherent.

(I did not just misspell coherent - three times - before I got it right)

I have not given my toddler motrin every night for the past week+ in hopes that he'll quit this middle-of-the-night tooth-ache waking. How do I know his teeth hurt, you ask? Well, I just know. And you know me, I certainly wouldn't give him Motrin, or any medication for that matter, unless I knew exactly what I was giving it to him for. I would NEVER, you know, just give him Motrin on the off chance that his teeth were waking him so that I might, you know, be able to get a full night's rest. I know children shouldn't be given medication that often, or for that long.

It was not my toddler who I found lying prostrate in the mud (voluntarily, I'll add) out at Roca's pumpkin patch. It was also not me who allowed him to soil himself in the dirt and mud forgetting that I had not brought a change of clothes. Not me.

I did NOT go on a date with my husband last night (a wonderful date, might I add), leaving our son with dear friends, and come home to realize I hadn't put ANY diapers in our diaper bag for him. Come to think of it, I did NOT wonder why he was not in a target diaper when he came home and then just figure it must have been easier for Rachael just to grab one of Teagues to put on him. (thanks for that, by the way :)

My child did NOT awaken in the middle of the night because the power went out. Who does that? How did he even know? Well, It is also not my child who is addicted to his sound machine - so addicted in fact that it's absence awakened him. I was NOT up most of the remainder of the night rocking a very confused toddler who simply would not be put down to save his life. My loving husband came in at 5:30am to relieve me, and I did NOT take him up on his offer to grant me an hour and a half of needed sleep while he rocked the confused toddler.

Finally, I did NOT find my son reading his "hooray, I obeyed" book TO an adoring crowd of stuffed animal friends this morning. My little ball of energy doesn't sit still nearly long enough to read a story with or to anyone, let alone long enough for me to photograph the event.

The house of one nap

2010-10-16T13:18:00.000-07:00

You wouldn't think that going from one nap to two (Levi, not me, in case that wasn't obvious) would make a HUGE difference in my day. But it does!

I figured I'd just get right to the point of my post. It all started back in - oh - The end of May I'd say. Levi would take two naps every day for like a week, and then there would come a single day when he simply wouldn't go down for a second one. As the weeks went by we had more and

more days like this until sometime in the middle of September we were having more one-nap days than two-nap days. To make matters worse, that ONE nap (on the one nap days) was quite short. It was only the standard 60-75 minutes. One short nap = a cranky toddler.

Fast forward to this past week and all of the sudden I have a toddler who has started sleeping 12 hours (instead of the standard 10.5) at night and napping 90+ minutes smack in the middle of the day. I guess I always thought in the back of my mind that he would get it all ironed out, but it seemed like it was taking forever.

Needless to say, I'm happy that I'm now left with a very happy kiddo who sleeps well at night (for the most part), and takes one very decent nap during the mid-day. The only downside is that now I don't have my time in the morning to blog.

I know, you're sitting there at your computer singing a song of pity for me. You're playing your tiny finger violin all the while thinking "you should be THRILLED to have a toddler who sleeps and naps at reasonably tolerable, and also predictable intervals!" and rest assured, I am. No,

really, I AM! But like most humans on the face of this earth, I dislike change because it makes me uncomfortable and it breaks my routine. Do you follow? What I mean to say is that I'm not so much complaining, as I am making a valid excuse for my lack of blogging... and by all expectations, my future lack of blogging.

As for what has been going on recently - I have begun to redefine the word "busy". Life with a toddler is much different than life with an infant (and I suspect life with a toddler plus any other children would be exponentially more busy). Levi and I spend the majority of our mornings these days out and about. We run our errands, We go to the Childrens Museum (one of this

country's best), we go to the zoo, we play with our pals at the park, we visit friends at their homes, hunt down garage sale treasures, and all sorts of other things. For the most part, I do my best to tire the boy out.

By 11:30 we are home for lunch, and some time around 12:30 (sometimes as late as 1:30 recently, as he has been *GASP* sleeping until 8:00am) Levi takes a nap. This nap, all depending on how well I tired him out, can last from 90 minutes to 3 hours. Needless to say, I do my VERY best tiring him out.

Once awake for the afternoon, we usually have some cuddle time in our rocker where he likes to nurse and be quiet while mommy catches up on Oprah's latest. Then, we're off again, out of the house to run an errand or visit a friend. On days where there simply isn't another errand to run we try to keep as busy as possible with chalk, and crayons, and bubbles. We play with water, sticks in the yard, and anything that rolls. We go on nature walks, visit our next-door neighbo

rs, or walk to the Library. Sometimes we Skype with family in Seattle.

The theme of our day is "busy". Why? because This little dude has more energy than he knows what to do with. Without an outlet for said energy I end up with a very crabby toddler who whines and hangs on my ankles while signing "nurse" and saying "MUH?" (which loosely

translates to "milk-time", our phrase for nursing)

So, in short, don't be surprised if the theme of my blog ends up being "I'll-update-it-when-I-get-around-to-it" and blogging subjects are less interesting, and more informative.

Some day I'll get around to typing up the rest of my costco/supersaver/target price comparisons. Some day. For now, I leave you with a very cute picture of two very cute kids I saw at the pumpkin patch. So cute, I even took one of them home!

A post in which I remember I cannot place my faith in dollars.

2010-10-04T11:12:00.000-07:00

It was not long ago that Jonathan and I were in Washington, living in Pullman. He was attending WSU, earning his masters, and I was working full time+ as a restaurant manager/catering coordinator. While things were by no means rosie all the time, we really did "have it made". We gave to the Lord, paid 350 a month for rent, had a few minimal bills (phones, insurance, electricity, internet), and bought just enough food to survive on. Everything else we threw into the bank, usually before we even had time to read the numbers on the paycheck. We're savers by nature (we find it difficult to spend money on ourselves) so it wasn't particularly difficult.

Fast forward to 2008. We moved to Nebraska where Jonathan was offered a job. By the grace of God, I also was offered a job. As planned, we tithed, paid our bills, and threw everything else in the bank. It was similarly as easy.

We bought a house; and even though we were now certainly spending more each month, we were still able to throw all of my paycheck into the bank. And I would say it was still relatively easy in the sense that we didn't feel like we were "strapped".

Fast forward to 2009. We had a baby. I quit my job. We stepped out on faith, knowing that we had been able to successfully live within the confines of Jonathan's paycheck in the past, and praying that it would also be possible to do so with a little one. We knew this would not be easy. With prayer, we made choices which would effect us financially (such as cloth diapering), we made choices which would effect us socially (such as reducing our budgeted allowance for eating out and entertainment). We made lots of choices. Together, those choices, the many prayers which preceded them, and the grace of God for which we are truly unworthy, this little family of three has been plugging along month - after month - after month - debt free.

And that was the goal. Right? To live on Jonathan's paycheck. Or was it...

I mentioned before that Jonathan and I are, by nature, savers. We have a difficult time NOT saving. As such, it is difficult for me NOT to see money going into savings each month but rather to be SPENDING ALL OF IT. It scares me. It makes me feel unsafe. It makes me feel uneasy and I DON'T LIKE IT. To be brief, I like to save for the sheer joy of saving. (How dumb is that?) So to say that it was my goal to live debt free would be - truly - fibbing. My unspoken goal was to live within the confines of Jonathan's salary AND to save money on the side.

Fast forward to September, 2010. On my list of expenses to pay are a plane ticket home to WA (our August trip, the bill for which I paid off in September), baggage fees, and one, nay TWO trips to an endodontist who is NOT covered by my insurance - one trip of which included an $875 root canal. ACK! As you may have guessed, without breaking the law I cannot fit these items into an already stretched budget. I simply cannot. And so, without further adeau, I would like to introduce you to: September 2010, the month when Jonathan and Melissa overspent their budget by $506.44

My eyes get big when I see that. I'm ashamed. Totally. And, on top of that, I'm fear full.

Except I'm not telling you the whole truth.

You see, savers that we are, we do indeed have an emergency account. We can (and will) transfer money from this account to cover the overage. But that very act makes he shiver in my boots. What if we spend our emergency account until it's dry? what if we continue to experience circumstances which force us to spend spend spend? What if Jonathan contracts some kind of weird flesh eating bacteria and has to be sent to a state-of-the-art hospital in Pa Pa New Guinea". WHAT IF? WHAT THEN?

The voice of reason becomes so quiet when I'm balancing our budget, that sometimes I almost cannot hear her at all. She speaks of thinks like "faith", and "provision", and "wisdom". As in, when we have faith, and ask for wisdom to make wise financial choices, God will provide --> even if his provision is not what we expected, even if his provision does not come in the package we desired.

So here we are in October. September has passed and yet I find myself continuing to worry about things I have little control over (read: I worry about the possibility that I may have to go back to work, that we may have to find a day care, that we may not be able to afford to raise more children...), but I do know this: If I place my faith in the dollars remaining in our emergency fund I will ultimately be dissatisfied, frustrated, and full of yet more worry.

(here comes the pep-talk)

The truth is, we can't plan for the unplanned, we cannot prevent the unexpected, and (despite my deepest efforts), we cannot fix things that are not yet broken (I'll explain our great bath-tub leak another time). So here I go, off into the depths of October, with a greater determination to live with what I have and purchase only what I need, but at the same time not to look at the unexpected necessities as God's unfaithfulness towards us. Rather, to look at them as opportunities to place our faith where it belongs.

Can I get a mouth-transplant?

2010-09-30T11:23:00.000-07:00

The reason I have not blogged in the past week is because I'm sick and tired of writing about my stupid teeth. Some days I wish I could have them all removed and exchange them for a set of dentures I could take out every night and place in a glass of scope.

But I digress...

The root canal was easy. The healing, not so. I could go into a long, drawn out, soliloquy about how folks with TMJ (like myself) often have a hard time healing from root canals because the ligaments that support our teeth and jaw are overworked and underpaid, but that would likely be boring and nobody would make it to the end of my post (if you're still reading, I applaud you). So instead, I'll go on to more interesting matters.

My son. My son to whom I have taught quite a few signs. My son whom I still nurse. My son. His worlds of nursing and signing have collided and now my toddler has figured out how to "ask" for "milk time" (as we call nursing in our home). I cannot tell you how long I've been waiting for him to learn how to do this, but more than that, I cannot tell you how much I want him to quickly forget how to ask. Why? because now that he's figured it out HE WON'T STOP ASKING. There are parts of my body which were quite enjoying what they surely figured was the weaning process at work - but alas, it wasn't. it was apparently just a break.

Ah well. I haven't seen many college students still breastfeeding, so I can only assume he'll quit one day. And when that day comes, I'm sure I will be very sad and wish that I could still scoop him up in my arms and nurse the blues away. I'd better savor this.

Speaking of new things Levi is doing, he has also recently learned how to climb - nay, jump - up onto each and every piece of furniture in our home. Not only that, but has figured out that if he climbs onto a piece of furniture, he can climb onto higher things from there (i.e. the bay window, the kitchen table, etc.) Nothing is safe. Nothing. I am awaiting the day I come back from a short bathroom trip to find him swinging from the curtain rod.

I have cute pictures I'd love to post (like the one of Levi and jonathan, both chowing down on Gyro meat at our local Greek Festival. Who knew my kid liked spiced lamb?) but as usual my camera is upstairs with my light-sleeping baby. One of these days I'll surely remember to bring it down.

One of these days.

Do you say that a lot? I feel like I use that phrase ALL THE TIME! And yet I guess all it means is that my time is filled with the things that matter, and everything else takes a back seat. And that's ok.

Drum roll please

2010-09-22T07:39:00.000-07:00

Well, I did it.

After a couple nights of wake-you-up-mid-sleep pain, I called and scheduled a root-canal on what I *think* is the problem tooth. I had it done at 11:00 yesterday.

And ya know what? it was - get ready - easier than getting my crown put on. Yes, that's right, I said easier.

I have a theory that the people who say "root canals are TERRIBLE!" are really just remembering all the pain they were in prior to the root canal, because let me tell you, once Dr. Rush numbed me up, I could have fallen asleep. It was the first time in DAYS I hadn't felt my mouth throbbing.

Ok, now all the poking and prodding was no picnic. It's not like I'd sign myself up for another one tomorrow just to fill some free time, but it was NOTHING like the horror stories I've heard, and very much like the few no-nonsense stories some friends and family members have told me. I did choose to go to an endodontist (a root-canal specialist) and that may have made a HUGE difference in my experience, but I don't have anything to compare it to.

For those of you who have had the procedure done in the past, yes, I did have to have "interpulpal" numbing (numbing inside the tooth), which is typically the most painful part of a root canal but I have to say it was no big deal. She said "I'm going to count to three and the in-tooth numbing will be over". And it was.

Remember back up at the top where I said I *think* it was the tooth that was so bothersome. Well, I still do, but there is a possibility that the one next to it is also problematic. I'm trying, for now anyway, not to borrow tomorrow's troubles by thinking about it. The whole area is rather sore, and I'm on a good deal of Ibuprophen to take care of all that gum-tissue pain that is expected with any invasive dental work, so we'll see how it all feels after I stop taking Advil in a few days.

For now though, everything in my mouth feels MUCH better. Whether I need more work or not, this feels like a great improvement. Granted, I haven't chewed anything on that side yet, and I'm quite hesitant to touch my top and bottom teeth together (although part of that may be because I'm scared that it will hurt and prove that I need more work done) but I'd consider the procedure a grand success.

So, thanks for your prayers everyone, it was no fun, but it's over for now!

I'll post a picture of my tooth x-ray for you to ogle at when I get time.

NOT ME Monday

2010-09-20T11:02:00.000-07:00

Oh gee, I make so many embarrassing moves each week, it's hard to pick so few that a post will be short enough to be enjoyable. Here goes.

This Saturday we had our lifegroup over for brunch. It was absolutely lovely. So lovely, that I kept reminding my husband, all afternoon, how wonderful it was to have everyone over. Before they came I baked a batch of cinnamon rolls (with a disgustingly simple recipe that I really should post sometime) and I certainly did NOT run out of both brown sugar and powdered sugar. Actually, to be honest, I did not look and find that I had two, nay, only one tablespoon of powdered sugar with which to make icing (who even KEEPS one tablespoon of powdered sugar anyway??). I did not proceed by asking my dear neighbor for hers. Which reminds me, I did not also borrow nonfat dry milk from her a couple of days ago for yogurt making.

My husband and I went on a date yesterday afternoon (thank you Blaskes!) and upon arriving at our favorite local restaurant (the green gateau) I was certainly NOT informed that they were in fact closed. No, I always check things like this BEFORE we plan a childcare-provided date with one another. I'm a GOOD planner after all. After said restaurant turned us away we did not walk aimlessly around downtown, noting that 90% of ALL the restaurants were closed on Sunday afternoons. (I should note that we DID have a fantastic time with one another after we found a local dive called yia yia's, and shared ice cream at ivana cone)

In preperation for Levi's friend Teague to spend the week with us I did a little preparing in the way of cutting up some fruit and veggies, and preparing some easy-fix dinners for the week. However, I did NOT forget two MAJOR ingredients for the roast I was going to throw into the crock pot this morning. I'm so organized, I would never forget ingredients. Not only that, but I would NOT forget to even put said ingredients on my grocery list. Ugh. Hope you like pastaroni hubby.

Upon looking at the thermostat in the house this morning (which read 68 degrees, very low for this time of year) I did not tempt fate and wear a sweater WITH a jacket out this morning. No, I did not ignore the weather man when he said that, despite the morning cool, we would indeed reach 90 this afternoon. I know Nebraska's Fall's well by now, I know that this is how it goes: cold in the morning, scorching in the afternoon. I am not still wearing said sweater because I'm scared that if I so much as move an arm muscle I'll wake one of the two sleeping toddlers.

...speaking of those toddlers... They have certainly NOT defied all my expectations of fit throwing and melt-downing by being complete cherubs the entire morning. They also did not BOTH go down for naps at the SAME TIME without so much as a peep of discontentment. Because we have a small house which is very poorly insulated I am NOT relegating myself to the couch for the duration of their naps - however long that may be. I do NOT have to pee (just keep repeating that to myself)

How about you? I bet you never do anything to embarrass yourself (you certainly don't misspell the word "embarrass" as much as I do, I bet. and even if you did I'm SURE those little red misspelling underlines wouldn't drive you NUTSO as you continue typing and then have to go back and correct them because you CAN'T STAND their red-lineyness. Is that even a word?)

Happy Monday everyone, happy Monday.

Sharing, or lack there of.

2010-09-17T11:40:00.001-07:00

I don't know how my son learned his most recent behavior - I don't know if he learned it from one of us, or if he's just acting on his in-born sinful nature. Anyhow, here's how playdates go:

Scene:

Teague (Levi's buddy) has a toy
Levi runs up to Teague, screams, and pulls it - nay - rips it from his hands
A laid back Teague moves on to a different toy
Assuming this toy must be more interesting than the first, Levi runs up to Teague, screams, and rips it from his hands
A laid back Teague moves on to a different toy
Remembering that THIS was indeed the toy he wanted, Levi runs up to Teague, screams, and rips it from his hands
I step in and hold said toy on my lap for both boys to use at the same time.
Cue temper tantrum and all-out wail fest from my flesh and blood.

And... Curtain.

So, what do I do?

EVERY time someone picks up a toy - any toy - my son simply HAS to have it. It's thoroughly aggrivating for me, and I can only imagine how irritated his little pals are going to become. Of course, it's worse with the toys at our house than it is when we're in the homes of others, but it happens there too. He's determined to get his way.

Wait - did I just describe a toddler?

Possibly, but there simply MUST be a cure for this type of behavior. How do I teach him that he cannot take toys from others - at the ripe old age of 15 months? I need a strategy here people. Help!

After writing this post, I found This article which describes, to the letter, what Levi does. Even the "proto-sharing" which he's an ace at. Proto- sharing is what we, in elementary school, used to call "indian giving" (VERY not-PC. I know. I'm not condoning the use of the phrase). It involved handing a toy out to another individual as though you were going to give it to them, and then pulling it back. Where do they get this stuff??

At a loss (and not a lose of nerve)

2010-09-16T11:20:00.000-07:00

As in, I didn't (repeat, did not) have a root canal this morning

Although, I almost wish I had. Because I'm still in pain.

I showed up at the crack of 8:00 - which would have been fine had my adorable son not chosen THIS morning to sleep until... well, I don't know when he would have slept until because I had to go wake him up at 7:00 to head to our friends' home where he could be supervised while I headed to what I thought would be my first root canal.

And it wasn't. Did I say that already?

I arrived there, shaking, and practically in tears of both pain and frustration mingled with fear. They took an x-ray and I spoke with the hygienist for a while. When the Dr. came in she performed a number of fairly rudimentary tests. "here, bite on this, tell me if it hurts". "Let me put something cold here, tell me if it hurts." "Does it hurt if I tap here? how about here?"

The result?

The pain is actually radiating from BETWEEN two bottom, back molars. One, the furthest one back, is the newly crowned molar. The other has only a filling. A LARGE filling, but just a filling none the less.

The problem with this result is that it lead the Dr. to believe that the nerve was not damaged. In other words, it isn't worth removing. She postulated 3 possibilities: one, the non-crowned tooth has a crack in it that hasn't reached the nerve. Such a crack might be aided by a crown - even if it's only a temporary fix before a root canal is necessary. two, the recently crowned tooth is still calming down, as is the one next to it which was likely jostled around a bit. Three, the recently crowned tooth needs a root canal, but isn't to the point of yank-it-out pain yet. Such pain, she told me, may be characterized by waking you up from a dead sleep, keeping you from drinking anything that isn't room temperature, etc.

My fourth theory is that my horrific (yes, it has reached that level) TMJ causes some pain which radiates from my jaw to my molars. This theory becomes especially tempting to believe when I consider that I ONLY have TMJ on my right side, and ALL these teeth are on my right side as well - right next to my jaw. Go figure.

So, about my tooth (I'm sure you're SICK of hearing about this, but hopefully the end of the saga is imminent) The pain only occurs when the bottom and top teeth touch. So I can concievably eat an entire meal, and as long as I'm being VERY careful not to let the teeth touch, I can come out just fine. But the moment they do, wowee!

So I made an appointment to have the other molar crowned tomorrow. I may yet cancel it, not sure if I jumped the gun. Not sure if I should just wait it out and see if the tooth "settles down, but really, it's already been 6 weeks. Can't someone just wave their magic wand and make this all disapeare?

I'm going to re-name this year

2010-09-14T11:35:00.000-07:00

... "the year of the dentist"

After all, that's where I'm spending the majority of my time - and our money.

The saga (in case you haven't been keeping up with it) all started a few months ago - maybe three - when I finally had x-rays taken. You see, although I don't miss my normal office visits, I hadn't had x-rays in over a year since I was pregnant with Levi for two 6-month check ups. Lo and behold, the x-rays uncovered two problem areas. Just two. I could handle that.

Because the first dentist I went to was new and totally uninformed (read: told me they were a preferred provider for my insurance when they certainly were NOT) I switched dentists. This new dentist took care of my one cavity, and one deteriorated filling (which needed a crown). Now, I had been having some pain in the spot where he put that crown, but I figured it was due to the deteriorated filling, so I figured the pain would subside once the crown was in place.

I was wrong.

Turns out, the pain is in a different tooth completely, but it's hard to tell which tooth is hurting exactly when they're all way back there in the far reaches of one's very large mouth. So, in I go again, to determine what exactly could be the problem. That was yesterday. What I learned was both what I had figured, and what I had dreaded. I have a cracked molar - or so the dentist thinks. It's very hard to tell because the ENTIRE SURFACE of that tooth is covered in an amalgam (silver) filling, placed 10 years ago or so.

Dentist refers me to endodontist (mouth-nerve-specialist) to figure out, with her special equipment, what is wrong with my tooth.

So, I call Dr. Rush, the endodontist, and schedule an appointment for Thurday morning, bright and early. This is the point where i get weak in the knees, as I discover that I have made the appointment and cannot really turn back. Why is this scary? well, you see, once Dr. Rush looks at my teeth she will then immediately take care of it/them. Likely with a root canal - because that's usually what's done with cracked teeth.

The two words "root canal" are enough to make me faint. This is is the girl who got PUT UNDER for the removal of ONE wisdom tooth. ONE! I believe the very kind receptionist when she says that Dr. Rush is very good. I have no trouble believing she is - I, however, am jumpy. I am scared. And I lack MAJOR faith when it comes to the dentistry department. Remember This post?

Anyway, according to her office, the entire procedure (whether it be a root canal or something different) will take one hour. One. I endured 24 hours of labor - and at least three of those were in transition, at 9.5 centimeters, without pain medication. You'd think this would be NOTHING! But man, it's freakin' me out.

So say a prayer for me on Thursday morning. In the week that follows I'll also have to get a crown put on the root-canaled tooth, yet another dental process I'm none-too-thrilled with. When all is said and done we'll be out over $1,000 (oh yes, that's AFTER insurance. ouch) but I'm sure it will be well worth it to be able to eat hard things again. It's been a while.

the "FISH" philosophy

2010-09-10T11:37:00.000-07:00

Do you know what that is?

It's an inspirational team-centered video series.

like the kind you have to watch with people you're going to be working so closely with that you're bound to get sick of them sooner or later

Basically, the video series focuses on teamwork and cooperation in a work-place setting.

The FISH philosophy includes four points:

Play
Make their day
Be there (aka be present)
Choose your attitude

I hate to admit that when I sat down to write this post, I remembered not four, but ONE of the bullet points. I'll get to that later.

I first saw "The FISH video" when I was in High school. I was taking a class called cullinary arts - it was actually a class and a for-profit catering business rolled into one (and you wondered whether or not Jonathan and I were really foodies from the beginning - silly you). Our teacher, who I strongly disliked, I'll be honest, had us sit down and watch this video as a way of motivating us to work together towards the greater purpose of pleasing our customers.

And it worked - mostly. Actually, the incentives of gift certificates to area restaurants were really what made most of the class shape up and get work done (without being paid, might I add, but instead for school credit) But this post really isn't about that class - it's about the philosophy, so, I digress.

I have found, recently, that the FISH philosophy applies to me now more than it EVER did in any work environment. I mean think about it, what do I do all day as a stay-at home mom (yes yes, aside from laundry, cooking, cleaning, and driving all over tarnation) I play, I try to ensure Levi has an enjoyable day, and I try to be as present as possible, interacting with him.

but wait. I missed one.

Yes, it's that last one that I truly rememberd. It's that last one - the one about choosing my attitude - that I've had such trouble with lately. If you're a mom you probably understand that it is VERY EASY to allow little things, like totally worthless naps to completely ruin your attitude. And it only takes ONE LITTLE THING to do it.

Today Levi woke up at 6:15, happy as a lark, and I rolled over and commiserated to my pouty self that the morning would probably be no fun at all. No fun, because when he wakes early, he's ready to nap early. Duh. When he naps early, he's ready for bed early. Duh. When he goes to bed early, he wakes even earlier. Duh. And this cycle took my attitude and shoved it so far down the toilet, I'm quite sure the plumbing system couldn't handle the load.

And it is in moments like these that (warning: here comes some self-talk) I have to remind myself that Levi is not in charge of my attitude. I am. I decide whether something will make me irritable, and I decide what I will brush off. And since that ball is in MY court, I, as an adult, am responsible for setting the good example of a happy heart.

So today I challenge ME to choose MY attitude - and I will not allow all the junk going on around me dictate how I will respond, in what tone of voice, and with how many eye-rolls. So there.

Standards of Identity

2010-09-09T12:39:00.000-07:00

Speaking of being "foodies", There's a term we use in the food processing world. It's a term I used A TON when I was working in the Food Processing Center at the University of Nebraska: Standard of Identity.

Many food products have a "standard of identity". This just means that, in order to carry a particular name, they must meet certain standards. To be called a "custard" for example a product must contain a certain amount of egg and a certain amount of cream. To be called "mayonnaise", a product must contain a certain amount of egg as well. These standards ensure that wackos out there aren't creating a frozen dessert out of corn and trying to market it as "ice cream", thereby fooling the unknowing public.

We, also, have standards of identity in society, only they aren't regulated like they are for food. Generally, they're assumed. You assume, for example, that if someone tells you they have a degree, they mean they attended an educational institution and obtained a diploma. Unless they're trying to be someone they're not, or they're lying to you, you're probably correct in your assumption. Similarly, if someone tells you they have kids, you'll probably assume they are referring to little people they're raising, and not small goats. And usually, you'd be right.

What this brings me to is a HUGE point of anger, a very large bone I have to pick. Why is there seemingly no standard of identity for Christians? The brain-child of this post comes from what I consider to be an absolutely heinous act by a Florida "pastor" who intends to burn Koran books on September 11th. And yes, he calls himself a "Christian".

Let me be perfectly clear: I believe that Jesus Christ is the ONLY one true way to salvation. I believe that Muslims will face judgement in front of God himself, just as will ALL of humanity who have not placed their trust in Him, and have not believed in His solemn promise of salvation through the death and resurrection of this son Jesus.

HOWEVER.

To take a book cherished by an entire people group and; in the name of a religion which MANY Americans claim as their own; to burn that book as a sign of hatred, is absolutely wrong. I don't care what day of the year it is. In what way does something so offensive win any believers to Christ?

And isn't that what we were called to do? To make disciples out of all the nations?

It's about Love, people. Now I'm not saying "let's just ignore sin, and have a big 'ol love party", but if we do not come FIRST in love, who will listen? Who?

I'll tell you one thing. The pastor who is planning to burn those books on the 11th will NOT be sharing Christ's unending love with ANYONE. And certainly not a muslim. I am ashamed that he has intentionally aligned himself with the God I love so dearly, with the Savior who stole my heart. I am horrified that people outside our religiously free United States may lump my Jesus in with his hatred. Horrified.

Beyond the simple tenets of faith, there is no standard of identity for a Christian. And that makes me upset, because I think this act of horrific hypocrisy has the potential to deflate outreach efforts of MANY who are risking their lives as good-news-spreaders in the Middle East, and throughout the world.

Lord, may they see your light through all this mud. May they see your light.

Food. Lots of food.

2010-09-09T11:39:00.000-07:00

My husband and I are foodies.

That is to say, our lives really do revolve around food.

Well, not mine so much anymore, now that I'm no longer gainfully employed, but his world is all wrapped in milk, and cheese and ice cream, much like mine used to be wrapped up in all-things-Italian.

So, it should come as no surprise to anyone that the very service opertunity I would seek out at our church would be one related to food. I love to shop, I love to cook, I love to serve meals to big groups. I love the looks on peoples faces when they see what I've created. I love the details; the serving dishes, the garnishes. I like eating too, but not nearly as much as I like making (which is a good thing, otherwise I might not fit through my front door.

A while back (as I'm sure I've blogged about before, but honestly I'm too lazy to go find the link and link-up to that post) I volunteered to cook a meal for a group of 15 once a month. The church pays for the food and I deliver it. Simple. This saves them money because they're only paying for the food, and it gives me the opertunity to strech my culinary wings. A few months later I was asked to do a monthly meal for 30, which I accepted as well. Then, I don't think it was very long after that, I was asked to do a meal for 70, one time.

This one, I had to think about. I had to figure out how I could pull this off without a commercial kitchen, and without an account with a food service providor. No walk-in cooker, no steam-jacketed kettle, no flat top. No steam table, no convection oven, no hotel pans, no staff of 30. And of course, no Sysco. What in the world could I pull off - ALONE?

Truth be told, I was plum out of ideas. This from the woman who's organized catering for over 1,000 - but the lack of all those important pieces of equipment & resources (and MOST importantly, the STAFF) really puts limits on what you can do.

In the end I settled on Italian meatball sandwiches on french bread, creamy pesto pasta salad, Sundried tomato pasta salad, garden greens, fresh watermelon, and oreo frosted brownies.

I could drone ON and ON about what I did early, and what I saved until the moment of, but it would likely bore almost everyone. Suffice it to say, the success of any meal is three fold: preperation and organization beforehand, punctual set up, and appealing, detailed presentation. Things like colorful serving dishes, multi-colored lettuces, and hand-cut rose tomatoes really do make all the difference. Of course, they won't make up for dry meatballs, or gluey pasta salad, but that's why I stuck with food I knew well.

My thanks go out to Lewis (my former boss/restaurant owner) without whom I would have absolutely ZERO knowledge of the food service industry, let alone the confidence to take anything like this on. I would also have no notion of portion sizes, or recipes. Also thanks to Costco. Man, I can't wait 'till 2011 when we actually have one here in Lincoln. And, Dani Gipe who gave me the magnificent idea a few years ago to add honey (yes, honey) to my pasta sauce to take away it's acidity. Man, that is a GREAT tip.

Adventures at Costco

2010-09-04T11:32:00.001-07:00

I went to bed late last night.

My husband went to bed later - actually, as I was heading to bed, he was heading BACK in to work to finish some unfinished business.

True to form (as he does seemingly every time we go to bed late) our little munchkin was up with the dawn at 6am. Crying. What does that mean? All together now: he's still tired!

You got it. And he was. but he wasn't going back to sleep, so in my half-awake state I roll over and say the four words every husband wants to hear first thing in the morning: "wanna go to costco?"

And he gave me the most loving response: "can we go to IHOP first". Of course we can! And thinking, what's better to do with a still sleepy toddler than to strap him into a restraining device and head down the highway? Absolutely nothing of course!

My plan was that he'd fall asleep in the car and snooze for 30 minutes or so, leaving me with a contented, rested, and yet not over- rested (read: still willing to take an afternoon nap) toddler. Needless to say, my plan failed - and my son wailed.

most.of.the.way.to.Omaha.

But IHOP was such fun. As a rule I generally dislike IHOP food, but I'll do practically anything for a husband whose willing to leave the house at 7:30am on a Saturday. After breakfast we were on our way to what I could only hope would be a highly successful price grabbing trip to my favorite big-box store. I AM from Seattle you know. I could practically live at Costco if such a thing were allowed.

The reason for my trip today was twofold. One: to buy the food I needed for next Thursday's church luncheon (they'll reimburse me later), and two, to check out prices on a list of items I've been making for a while now; to determine if I can get a better price here in town, or up at Costco. No, I'm not taking gas money into account. That's getting too detailed.

While I shopped and compared, my loving husband and adorable son ran up and down isles, burning up energy and giggling at one another. It was quite the sight. By the end both of them were pooped (and one of them had done so in his pants) and ready for a drink and a ride home.

The results of my comparisons, in no particular order (and this isn't all of them)

Baby wipes: cheaper in the economy Target brand pack (.018/wipe vs. .021/wipe)

Milk: cheaper at Costco (2.40/gal vs 2.99) but it goes on sale here in Lincoln all the time

Individual yogurts: Super-Saver's Best choice brand (usually around .05/oz vs. .08/oz)

Extra Virgin Olive Oil: Costco (6.99/liter vs. 4.99/liter)

Turkey Lunch Meat: Costco (.21/oz for Costco brand vs. 37/oz for Oscar Meyer at Super Saver

Chicken nuggets: Costco (.15/oz for white meat nuggets vs. .20/oz for tyson nuggets)

Ground turkey: Russ's Market (.99/one pound tube when on sale vs. 2.37/lb)

pasta sauce: Costco, barely (.0625/oz for best choice brand at super saver vs. .0620/oz for Prego)

Cheerios: Super Saver (.13/oz when on sale at Super Saver vs. .15/oz)

Rice milk: Costco (1.30/qt vs. 1.39/qt at Hy-Vee

My take home message(s):

ALWAYS price compare before you buy at Costco. Just because it's in bulk doesn't mean it's necessarily cheaper.
When you price compare, ALWAYS break things down by unit.
REMEMBER that Costco doesn't have "sales". Your local grocer does. It is HIGHLY possible that your local grocer will have a sale that will blow Costco's price out of the water, and WHEN that happens, buy IN BULK like you would at costco. Buy a whole case, or flat, or pallet if you'll use it before it goes bad.
Bring a list! Costco is a dangerous place to be without a list. Before you know it you will have tasty things in your cart like basil pesto, sun dried tomato bruschetta, pre-portioned salmon fillets, and apple sauce squeeze pouches. (Me? did I purchase these things? no, not me. I always stick to my list!)

I'll have more to add to this post after I visit Target, Super saver, and Hyvee over the next week. I wrote down more of Costco's prices (trash bags, for example, which are .06 each, and dish tabs which run .15 each) but I haven't had the time to match them yet.

I'll be heading back up to Costco in October, so if you want me to pick something up for you (and you don't mind throwing a couple dollars into the pot for gas) let me know*. And man, if you use disposable diapers, I've been told THIS is the place to go (200 size 4's for $40)

*no, smart-alec friends in Seattle, the offer doesn't extend to you, or anyone outside a 15 mile radius of my Nebraska home. I'm talking mostly to you, Dave.

there's so much going on right now

2010-09-03T11:59:00.000-07:00

yeah, I thought long and hard about that title, can't you tell?

Levi is no longer taking a morning nap - partly by his choice, and partly by mine. You see, typically he won't even go down for one until 10am, which completely obliterates my chances for getting him to take an afternoon nap. So, I made the call. Unless he wakes up unreasonably early (read: before 6:30am), he will not nap until after 12. Closed book.

What that means for me though, is that I don't step away from my dear child until lunch time.

That morning nap WAS my blogging time, and now it is no more (which is my poor excuse for lack of blog posts, and TOTAL lack of pictures).

What else is going on - let's see. We're doing toddler team-up at the childrens' museum, that starts on Sept 30th. We're signed up for Titus Women at Lincoln Berean (Mums, similar to MOPS). We play at milkworks with our toddler and mommy friends on Monday mornings. We go play outside at all sorts of playgrounds, and we have play dates with other friends almost every day of the week. I can't say no to playdates, he just interacts so well with friends, and it tuckers him out, so they're a win for both of us.

Meanwhile, I've kept myself VERY busy during his ONE 90 minute nap each day. We've had a couple roof leak issues crop up (tiny drips, not big problems. One has to do with the sealant on an exhaust pipe that runs out from our water heater, the second we aren't even sure exists but I was SURE I heard a drip, drip, drip, while I was standing in the kitchen the other night) so I've been making phone calls here and there. We're also in the middle of a potential home-loan

refinance. Looks like we may be able to reduce our interest rate from 5.875% to around 4.25 (if the info I got today from Lincoln Federal was correct).

And because I'm simply not busy enough, I've been cooking meals for our church. As I think I've explained before, there are meetings of all sorts of groups at the church on any given week

(church employees, not like weddings and stuff). So, instead of paying MORE to have a meal catered, they asked if anyone in the congregation would like to cater for free. It's a sweet set up for me because I love to make big meals, and they pay for all the food. - I started out cooking for groups of 12. Then, apparently they liked what I did because I was asked to do a bi-monthly meeting for 30. Then, apparently they liked what I did because I was asked to do a quarterly meeting for 70.

Now, these should be no big deal for me, right? I mean, this is the woman who catered for 1400 with ease... but there are a few tiny differences. No staff to help. No restaurant appliances. No equipment. So, I visited our local restaurant supply store recently and (after drooling over all the pieces that I knew, loved, and wished I had in my very own possesion) walked away with a couple of very large salad bowls that should serve my purpose nicely. Next thursday's meal

includes meatball subs with melted provalone cheese, creamy pesto pasta salad, creamy sundried tomato pasta salad, fresh cut watermelon, and spring greens with cheese and croutons. Oh, and frosted oreo brownies, can't forget those. For seventy. Ok, NOW you can call me crazy. AND you can come watch my kid on Wednesday because the prep work for this gig is going to be taking my EVERY OUNCE of energy.

But underneath this guise, I really do LOVE the rush. I used to get paid for it after all.

I've also made a few improvements to our hallways - which were largely naked. No longer! I hung a photo collage (newborn, 3 mo., 6mo., 1 yr) that we were given by the photographer who photographed Levi throughout his first year, and also a shadow box I made of newborn-Levi memories.

And there is the sound of my waking child. Adios 90 minutes, how I loved you.

NOT ME Monday

2010-08-30T12:28:00.001-07:00

I'm sure YOU never do anything that would later cause you to look back on your own actions with embarrassment. After all, I NEVER do anything like that. I'm that one woman you dream of being who has every little detail under control, whose child never misses a step, and whose husband always finishes each and every item on his honey-do list a day before it's due date. 'cause honey-do lists have due dates, dont'cha know.

Anyway, in my great perfection, here are some of the things I did NOT do this week:

I did Not start my week by walking up to a woman at Green Lake (in Seattle) and thanking her for nursing her toddler in public. Although this is certainly a thing a "lactivist" like myself would do, it could embarrass the poor woman and I'm thoughtful enough to wait until she's finished feeding her child
The following morning, upon arriving at the airport, clearing security, and arriving at my gate to see that BOARDING HAD ALREAY BEGUN, my control-needy self did NOT throw the worlds largest adult temper-tantrum. I know as well as the next person that the plane will not leave without me. In my haste, I did NOT squirt half of my son's (hugely necessary) dose of benadryl across the room as he dodged the syringe. I have better aim, and I'm far too patient to do something like, say, pin my son to the floor in an airport.
After arriving in Denver, I did NOT allow my toddler to toddle sans socks or shoes. I also did not get reprimanded by airport security because apparently "there are chemicles on the floor that are not safe for babies". Chemicals, Schmemciles.
Since we've been home I have NOT had a short temper for the simple reason that my toddler's reality (which, as you may have guessed, has been rapidly changing between Seattle and Lincoln, traveling, and time changes, and the complete inability to take a good nap) makes him grumpy. I have been patient and loving towards him. I have given him ALL my time and affection, knowing that anything I have to do can wait. I'm a good mother after all.
I did NOT break a cardinal rule of naping yesterday after church, by allowing my very sleepy child to take a "cat nap" at 10:45am until 11:15 am hoping upon hope that he would still nap in the afternoon. True to form, he did not, but in response to that, I did NOT allow him to talk, and play, and cry, and SCREAM for the better part of two hours. Of course, I did NOT do this. And the reason I did NOT do this would certainly have nothing to do with the fact that we were going to a housewarming party for a couple of friends and I wanted to tote along a cheerful child. That's truly selfish.
Once we returned home, and I saw all the BEAUTIFUL finidh work my husband had done on our basement, I did NOT go right ahead and start making a mental list of NEW things I wanted him to accomplish. No, like a good wife, I allowed him to bask in the feeling of accomplishment he was deserving of. I was grateful to him, and I let him have "everything checked off his list" for once.
And finally, when my little one woke up SCREAMING last night (three times between 11:45 & 1:00), and after two totally unsuccessful visits to his room, I did NOT take the child who thinks an adult bed is a play toy, into the guest room to sleep with me. I know full well what this leads to, and it ISN'T sleep. One hour later I was not STILL trying to calm down a now playful toddler. Arg.

I bet you aren't embarrassed about anything you did over the last week, but if you were, what might it be?

There's no place like home

2010-08-26T12:11:00.000-07:00

And by that I mean both Seattle and Lincoln. They are both home to me, after all.

Home (seattle) was wonderful. It never ceases to amaze me how much I learn about myself and my babe each time we take a trip. Traveling forces me to live outside my comfort zone, to do things that I normally wouldn't, to be bend-over-backwards flexible with routines, and traditions, and to go with the mighty flow. and what a flow it was.

We saw parents, grandparents, and great grand parents, brothers, sisters, aunts, uncles, and cousins. We visited not one, but two childrens' museums. We frequented kid-friendly coffee shops, fed many many ducks and chickens, and found water to splash in anywhere we could. We went swimming at greenlake, swimming at home, and swimming in the bath tub. We saw all the animals at the zoo, and even a few outside of it. We walked, and talked, and ate and ate. And ate.

We had two nap days, and one nap days. We NEVER got up in the middle of the night. Not once. Neither of us! We learned what a "pretty" was. We said and heard the words "no touching" no less than a thousand and one times. We experienced 90+ degree days in a home without AC. We said so-long to the sleep-sack in favor of normal toddler pajamas. We learned how to effortlessly climb stairs (but not how to back down them), how to get in and out of toy cars, how to step over tall thresholds, and how to back up and sit down in a small chair.

Indeed, we did MANY things. We grew and matured by leaps and bounds, and we were oh-so-very well taken care of. Levi's hair grew no less than an inch, and he no less than half of one. Our flight back was not so easy as our flight there, but it was nice to have a baby on pacific time who would gladly sleep in the following morning.

Out of shear laziness I have posted all applicable photos on facebook instead of uploading them here (which, as you may know, takes WAY TOO LONG), so go there to enjoy them. All in all, we are very glad to be back home (Lincoln) in our own comfort zone.

I feel like I'm forgetting to say SO MANY things, but that is likely because I haven't blogged in so very long. In time, all the "ah-hah" moments I had will come to me, and I'll be able to share them. Now, however, I have bills to pay. Bills which arrived whilste I was away. Bills which I need to pay out of an account at a bank which is in the process of changing hands. Cannot yout hear in my tone of type that I am insenced with this bank-changing-hands crap? Buuuuuuuut that's a story for another day. Cheers!

A vacation from my vacation

2010-08-21T20:20:00.000-07:00

as in, I think I may need one - once I return home

Levi and I have been here in Seattle nearly two weeks now. We flew out of Omaha way back on Tuesday, August 10th, and we'll fly out of Sea-Tac on Tuesday August 24th (benedryl in hand).

Now, please don't misunderstand me. We are both having a fabulous time, I assure you. We are enjoying every moment of family fun, soaking up the pacific northwest breeze, basking in the love of all our doting parents, grandparents, and great-grandparents, and being so very well taken care of - but there's still something to be said for being away from "home". Away from "normal". Away from mommy's organized, anxiety reducing, calm baby producing, rhythm and routine.

Yes, Levi has been a little handful lately. He'll be cute and cuddly as can be one moment, and then he'll have a total melt down the next. Today, on a rather lengthy car ride, I actually sat in the back seat with him (incorrectly assuming this would solve his woes) only to have him scream in my face all the way back home. I think his crankiness could well have to do with the lack of routine he's experiencing here, mingled with this whole I-want-to-drop-my-first-nap-but-sometimes-I-still-need-it thing. Tonight was the cou-de-gras of crankiness. I just about lost it with him.

Then I found a piece of chocolate. and I dove back in to finish off the evening.

Despite the wonderful time we're having, the irritability of my son, coupled with how much I miss my spouse, are really making me yearn for home. For a morning where daddy can get Levi out of his crib and I can just lay there for a brief moment. For an evening of making dinner and knowing that my son can play unattended in the next room because there isn't anything in there he can't touch

[very well meaning grandparents and great grandparents have LOTS of things that are off limits to toddlers. ALL of these things are virtual toddler magnets, and no matter how many brightly colored NEW toys you may have, "pretty's" (decorative items) will STILL be highly magnetic. in brief, "keep your lame toys mama, I'm after that candle/vase/china cabinet/bottle of rum/wine/candy dish/un-attached glass table top/coffeetable book...]

yes, I'm yearning for home. And even, gasp, for Nebraska.

When we first moved to NE I really yearned for Seattle - where the rest of my crunchy green friends lived. But now the tables have turned, and all the wrong I used to see in NE, I now see in WA. I guess my step-dad was right when he said "the longer you live there, the more you'll want to live there" We are quite settled, and it is very much home. and I'll write more about that later, but my brain is poorly mixed pancake batter and I think some sleep would bring some cohisiveness to the bowl.

There. How's that for a word picture?

If actual pictures are what you're after you'll have to head over to facebook - I'm posting them right now.

Oh, and Rachael, I'm SO ready for date nights. BRING-'EM

Lessons learned...

2010-08-11T09:47:00.000-07:00

...while flying with a 14-month-old

If you ask nicely, the airline folks will seat you at the front of the plane so you can get off faster, and they will also give you a seat without neighbors
the waiting time in the airport, and before the plane takes off are FAR harder than the time actually spent in the air
toddlers make friends with almost anyone, and most anyone will "play" with a baby contentedly - READ: no need to shuffle him away from strangers who only want to dote
*new* toys (never before seen by said toddler) are a LIFESAVER
battery operated toothbrushes are amazing teething toys
you don't have to hide if/whenyou give your kid benedryl - every mother within 10 feet has done the same thing at one time or another
Don't show a toddler that the window shade goes up and down, unless you desire for him to be fascinated with it
Ditto with the arm rest
Know that Benadryl takes 30 minutes to kick in. Time that with the plane's actual departure and subsequent nursing/feeding of said toddler. out-like-a-light
Expect that although you may have been able to keep said toddler totally asleep while strapping him into your Becco, he will wake up, and stay awake, for the duration of any layover you may have.
When space is tight (flight two) expect that a toddler who is in the 97th percentile for length will have his little feet laying on (and in our case, kneading like a cat) the lap of the person next to you. Pray you get a neighbor like we did.
If said toddler still nurses, FOR PETE SAKE don't let him nurse (at a precariously squashed angle) the entirety of both flights. You'll know why in the morning.
"no-spill" sippy cups are NOT no-spill under cabin pressure.
ALWAYS get a window seat - unless you want said sleeping toddler to have his cute little toes hit by the drink cart. Note: NOT an experience we had. Just an observation.
Do not expect that a toddler who may have slept on two flights to sleep AT ALL on the 45 minute drive home from the airport. On the contrary, expect him to have quite a bit of trouble settling down and going back to sleep.
drinking water = having to get out of seat = waking toddler. no water = no bathroom trip
Let the drink cart pass you by. There isn't enough room to put the tray table down anyway.
DO NOT bring a carry on. bring only what will fit under the seat in front of you. You know you aren't going to get up mid-flight and get into that carry-on anyway. Heck, you aren't even going to get into the back-pack you brought. less is more.
Have I mentioned the benedryl yet? Have I spelled it enough different ways. Probably

Likely more to come as I continue to process what was a much easier trip than I had anticipated. I'm glad it was at night (although I was rediculously tired) We'll see how the return trip goes --> leaving at 6:00am from Sea Tac.

and the countdown begins

2010-08-10T07:08:00.000-07:00

in 8 hours Jonathan will drive his family to the airport, to leave on a plane without him - and while I feel badly that he'll be here all alone, I don't think he envy's my position of being plane-side with our intensely curious toddler.

We're packed, armed with all kinds of never-seen-before toys, loaded with every thinkable snack, and ready to begin our journey. I'm a virtual ball of nerves meanwhile, but I should have expected that. Levi agreed to an AM snooze, and I'm more than happy for a little time to myself, but with everything done for our departure, I'm having trouble finding anything to do!

In a moment of shear genious last night (and after much fruitless searching at wal-mart and target) I finally hacked up one of our bed pillows and fashioned a travel pillow for Levi and I. My intention is to be the LAST ticket on the plane, and I don't want to have to fight for a pillow, or any overhead bin space, so we're just taking a small backpack and our own pillow. I'll rest easier knowing there's no reason I need to be on that plane right away. I would post a picture of said pillow (which includes a zipped pocket for his blankie too!) but alas, my camera and newly emptied SD card are packed. That SD card has been full for a week, which is my only excuse for the lack of posted pictures.

I'm sure Levi's grandparents will be pleasantly surprised at the many leaps and bounds of development he's made even since his first birthday. I'm hearing new "words" come out of his mouth every day. His newest is "uh-oh" - which, at first, came out "uh-uh", but he has since figured out the last syllable. He's also saying mama, dada, please (peeze), baby, hat, and a couple others I can't seem to remember. If' he's in the mood for it, he'll also point to his nose, ears, tongue, belly and toes. On occasion he can also find his eyes, but that takes a little doing. In addition to verbal words, he (if he's in the mood) will sign please, mama, cup, more, dog, sleepy, book and milk. We're currently working on "help me" but that one is two handed, and a little complicated.

He knows what "time to change your diaper" means (although, it sends him running from me), and he also responds to "time to eat" by grabbing the high-chair tray. I'm sure he really understands a LOT more of the common phrases I use but sometimes it's hard to tell unless he has a common/repeated response to what I say. For example, if we're in my room together (where he cannot be left unattended lest he empty ALL of our drawers and pull every reachable item in the closet off of it's hangar) and it's time to leave I will say "out, out, out please" and usually he'll head for the door, but not always.

Levi is becoming quite toddlerish in his young age - he and his pal Teague are constantly taking toys from one another and squaking when they feel they've been wronged by the other. It's nothing short of hilarious. Meanwhile, Teague's mommy and I watch and try our best to allow them to duke it out without our assistance. Levi also tests his boundaries on a daily basis. While there are few things that are "no-no's" in our home, he knows what they are. When he begins to get tired, or he's longing for attention he'll go from no-no to no-no, waiting for mom and dad to respond. It's yet another one of his tired signals.

So, if you're on the West coast I hope you get a chance to see him for yourself. If I look frazled and harried, there's a good chance I'm still catching up on sleep. After all, I woke up with my adoring son at 4:00am Pacific time this morning, and we'll arrive in Seattle tonighat at 11:15 pacific time. I count it as likely that Levi will wake with the (central time) sun again tomorrow which will mean another 4:00am awakening for me. Here's hoping it won't take him too terribly long to adjust!

Making Hay

2010-08-09T06:44:00.000-07:00

...while the sun shines.

Or, to be more precise, while the toddler naps. Which he should be doing. After all, he only slept 9 hours last night. Hubby left at 2:30am, baby woke at 5:30am. After taking 30 minutes to decide to have a happy attitude, mommy rolled out of bed at 6:00am.

Coffee. Ahem.

ok, now I think we're ready for a day.

Tomorrow the tot and I will leave for Seattle. I love Seattle. After all, I spent 18 years there. What I don't love are flights. What I really don't love are flights with toddlers - especially the kind that have to stay in my lap.

Remember your last flight? I mean, your last pre-child flight (if you do indeed have kiddos). Do you remember holding your breath as the woman with the babbling and/or whining 18 month old passed you by? I do. I remember being 28 weeks pregnant and flying home for my baby shower. I heard a toddler squaking behind me and said to myself "praise Jesus that isn't my child" along with the seemingly obligatory why can't she keep control of her own kid?" Well, this time I AM that woman, and LORD help me.

I'm not sure how intelligent this was, but I booked an evening flight. We'll arrive in Seattle around 11:15pm Pacific time. Our entire flying time will be during the time Levi is usually asleep. This could potentially backfire and leave me stranded on an airplane with an over-tired, over-stimulated toddler, but I guess I'm willing to take that risk considering there's also a chance he could sleep the entire way. Yes, he will have "help" in that department. (ahem, benedryll, ahem).

So, off I go to pack finish getting ready for our departure. If, friend, you are in Seattle, please let me know so I can connect with you - toddler in tow. He is awfull cute, and it would be a shame for you not to see him :)

Thinking ahead

2010-08-06T07:05:00.000-07:00

I do WAY too much of that, by the way, but in following with that trend...

I've been thinking ahead to our return home from Seattle. For a couple of months now I've been thinking (well, deciding really) about getting Levi out of the habit of nursing to sleep. You see, he really only nurses 4-6 times a day now (wake up, down for 2 naps, down for bed and occasionally a couple in between if he has a rough fall, or we go someplace where lots of other babies are nursing) but it's becoming a bit problematic that he won't go to sleep without doing so.

In the beginning this was my LIFE SAVER. If he hadn't nursed to sleep I'm afraid he never would have slept - and I'm not exaggerating. But now, well, now he's 14 months old, and (as I sit here and listen to him talk through his first nap instead of sleep) I'd really like it if someone else could potentially be able to successfully put him to bed. Add that to the fact that 75% of the time he doesn't really fall asleep at the breast anymore (see previous parenthetical statement) and I'm ready to change up our routine.

Jonathan and I talked about it last night. Usually at night we do bath time, PJ's and then daddy reads stories with Levi for a good 20 minutes or so (I say a brief hallelujah for 20 straight minutes during which I can clean the kitchen from dinner) then he calls me in and we nurse to sleep. Well, I think we'll just flip flop things a little. bath & PJ's, then nursing, then story time with daddy. I'm sure he'll give us heck in a handbasket for the first week or two, but I simply think it's time for him to develop his own ability to calm down & drift off. Without sucking on me.

Now here's where I get confused. You see, during the day (and I'll preface this by reminding you that he's currently trying to drop nap number one; a process I always imagined being much more black and white than very very grey and muddled) I begin our nap routine (like our bedtime routine sans daddy and bath) when he starts fussing. When he starts hanging on my right leg. When he goes around the house doing all the things he knows he's not supposed to do. This used to work well. These were his tired signs. Now, though, I'm following the same signals but getting different results. He acts quite tired, he even yawns and rubs his eyes, and yet he'll stay awake for over an hour, talking and fussing in his crib. Some days, I swear he MAKES himself overtired by refusing to nap.

Whatever happened to "babies will sleep when they need to sleep"?

I mean, it seems logical to me. If he's so tired, why doesn't he doze right off. I sure would! I fully realize he thinks he's missing out on fun with mommy, but if he only knew that mommy is doing laundry, cleaning counters, and washing diapers while he's in his crib, maybe he wouldn't be so frustrated to be missing out on it all.

Add to that the simple fact that the less Levi sleeps, the less Levi will sleep. Does that make sense? The more overtired he is, the less likely he is to take a gooooood loooooong nap - or, for that matter, sleep through the following night and awake rested. It's a perpetual cycle that I'm SICK OF.

So, sage advice? I'm all ears.

call me a Brine-o

2010-08-04T06:54:00.000-07:00

I've always been non-plussed by roast turkey. Thanksgiving meals had me headed straight for the stuffing, potatoes, and cranberry sauce - but this past Thanksgiving was different. With a nursing, dairy intolerant 7 month old, I couldn't have the grand majority of traditional Thanksgiving offerings (read: anything but cranberries and turkey were off-limits). Boy, was I in for a pleasant surprise.

This past year we were invited to our neighbors home where they were serving a brined bird. Brined? doesn't that mean it sat in a salt bath overnight. Well, yes. Yes it does. Any recipe that takes longer than an hour to prepare is typically WAY too involved for me, so I have always shied away from brines, but that turkey (oh man, that turkey) was SO good, I had to give the recipe a try for myself.

And I did so. With EXCELLENT results. A week after Thanksgiving I snagged a small turkey breast for pennies on the dollar, and just this past week I did the same thing using an ad match from another grocer. The resulting meal was unbelievably moist and flavorful. Without further adieu, here is the recipe I adapted from an original by Emeril

Ingredients:

one 5-7lb turkey breast, thawed

2/3C salt

1/2C brown sugar

1 large orange, cut into wedges

1-2 lemons, cut into wedges

1TBS dried rosemary

1TBS dried thyme

water to cover

---

a bit of oil or butter

salt (for seasoning)

6 peeled and chunked carrots

1 peeled and chunked onion

4 chunked potatoes

1TBS chopped garlic

1C chicken broth (for basting)

Directions:

Make brine. Combine salt, sugar, rosemary, thyme and citrus with a few cups of water in a large stock pot. Stir until salt and sugar dissolve. Rinse turkey breast, inside and out. Pat dry. place into stockpot with brine solution. Add water to cover the turkey breast and swish the turkey/brine a bit to get all the new water mixed in. Cover and let sit in the 'fridge overnight.

Preheat oven to 325. Remove turkey from brine. Rinse and pat dry. coat with a bit of oil or butter, and sprinkle with salt inside and out. Stuff with a few of the chopped vegetables and place BREAST SIDE DOWN in a roasting pan. Add remaining chopped vegetables around the turkey breast in the pan. Cook, uncovered, for ONE HOUR. remove from oven, turn breast side up, and baste with chicken broth. Continue cooking until thermometer reads 160 (or until that little automatic thermometer thingie pops up)

Mine cooked for a total of 2.5 hours, and it was a 6 pound breast.

Let sit at least 20 minutes before carving.

Welcome back to my life, roast turkey friend, I never knew you could be so moist!

Simple Math

2010-08-03T08:03:00.000-07:00

What do you get when you combine one squirrely toddler with one helping of this:

Why, This of course:

NOT ME Monday

2010-08-02T12:41:00.000-07:00

Monday?

Again?

Already?

... yes. Here we goooooooooooooo

Levi's naps have been - shall we say - different recently. As such, he has been unusually fussy. In the later part of last week, when I'd had just about enough of the sleepless whining I did NOT tell my 14 month old to "shut-up". Who says that to their child? Not me.

I did NOT put the same handful of avocado chunks on my son's highchair tray 4 meals in a row trying to get him to eat ONE SOLITARY PIECE of his (formerly) favorite food. Seriously. Just give the kid what he wants. He knows if he waits long enough you'll show up with the good stuff. Give IN already.

I did NOT pretend to eat Levi's oatmeal for breakfast just so he would want some.

I did NOT throw the diapers in the dryer - twice - because I was too lazy to hang them on the line.

I did NOT leave at least one refrigeratable item out on the kitchen counter overnight each day this week. I clean MY kitchen every night. You should know that.

I did NOT purchase any of the following convenience foods at the grocery store this past week; items I PROMISED myself I would never buy: rice-a-roni, chicken nuggets, and fish sticks. Not me.

I did not audibly groan this morning when my son awoke (at 5am) to the sound of my husband rolling over in bed. I know our bed makes a small creak from time to time, but SERIOUSLY? he can HEAR that? With his white noise machine MAXED OUT? Sometimes I think he has a stethoscope in there, and he's got it up to the wall listening to us in the next room. I did NOT also mutter "you've gotta be kidding me".

I did NOT squeal like a baby when the dentist took off my temporary crown last Tuesday, and placed a cold-cement-filled porcelain crown on top of my VERY sensitive filed-down molar. It did NOT take every morsel of courage I had to remain seated. I may or may not have also cried.

I did NOT actually look forward to my annual exam (you know, THAT annual exam) simply because it was an excuse to visit with my midwife. Whom I love. And not JUST because she delivered my son. I did NOT also arrive at said appointment with a brag-book of photos to show her.

Not me. I didn't do any of those things.

My name is Melissa...

2010-07-30T10:18:00.000-07:00

...and I have a produce problem (cauliflower, broccoli, bell peppers, grapes x2, celery, carrots, sweet potatoes, onions, garlic, nectarines, peaches, bananas, spinach, green onions, oranges, lemons, avocados, and probably something else I can't see amongst the many produce bags

Or maybe it's a yogurt/egg problem (18 yogurts, @ 4/$1, 2.5dz eggs @ .99/dz!)

I won't bother to mention the 36 boxes of raisins I snagged, nor the 6lb turkey breast for $1.39/lb. I'll also leave out the 10 32oz cans of sliced peaches I had to fit on the bottom of the cart. Let's face it, when I find things on sale, things we FLY through around here, I buy in BULK. Now if only I had a systematic way of organizing it all, I'd be set...

They tried to make me go to rehab, but I said...

2010-07-27T07:18:00.000-07:00

NO, NO, NO!

ok, well the rehab part isn't true.

But the NO NO NO part is as true as they come.

I feel like that's all I say these days. Every time I turn around I'm saying NO to something. Here I though I had my house reasonably well baby-proofed (and maybe I really do) but still, my 14 month old will find something to do that is most certainly off limits.

Take, for example, this morning. Levi has taken a particular liking to grabbing onto his high chair tray (from the floor) and hanging on it like a monkey. Surely, it will eventually break, so this deserves a no.

Similarly, he is determined to climb up onto the "oven door" on his play kitchen. Again, it will eventually break, and I'd rather it not. So, that's another no.

We go into his room so I can put away laundry and he takes all of his books and throws them on the floor. not necessarily a no, but I am SO TIRED OF PICKING THEM ALL BACK UP! I swear, I do it at least 5 times a day. As I was picking them up this morning he took the opportunity to empty his clothes drawers. He's lightening fast, Lightening I tell ya.

I could go on to explain how he's decided that ear-piercing screams are allowable whilst in the high-chair for any amount of time beyond 2.5 minutes. I could also lament about the significant increase in really annoying whining we've seen. But I suspect any of you with children will tell me that every kid in the universe does these things. I'm sure you'll tell me he's testing his boundaries, trying to figure out cause and effect. He's figuring out what kind of responses he gets from his actions.

And believe you me, he's figuring that out right quick. If only it could sink in faster.

I case you didn't know, let me tell you that Jonathan and I are not the types of parents to pat our disobeying child on the head, remind ourselves that boys will be boys, and send him on his merry way. We firmly believe that if he's old enough to pitch a fit (which he does, in full-toddler fashion now, on the floor) he's old enough to receive a punishment. As toddlers have especially short memories, we usually opt for a quick switch to the back of the thigh for blatant disobedience, (like the "I know I'm not supposed to do this, but I'm gonna look right at mom and do it anyway" kind of disobedience) and a separation from the family for tantrums (i.e. if you're going to scream, you'll scream in your crib, not at the dinner table). And I'd have to say, both of those things work really well - in the moment.

The trouble is, neither of them seem to carry over. What I mean is, my son could have been punished for, say, smacking the TV with a toy yesterday, and he'll go right back and do it again today, and tomorrow, and the next day. It's like he never stores it away. It's INFURIATING! I know learning is a process, but JEEZE LOUISE!

All that to say, this little "exploring my boundaries" thing our son has going on is driving me NUTZ. I'm sure you're looking at your screen right now saying things like "oh, you just way, it gets better when they can talk back to you!" and "That's NOTHING, he's not even TWO yet!" and believe me, I'm trying to put this all into perspective, but it's truly exhausting, and I feel like the bad guy ALL-DAY-LONG.

I'm coming to find that the only real solution is to get out of the house. He's so much better behaved when we leave the house. He doesn't try to climb up on tall objects, doesn't topple over chairs, doesn't even really fuss. I spend so much less of my energy fighting him, and so much more playing with him. Oh yeah, and when we're out, he actually plays with toys. Go figure. At our house he usually stares at them as if they aren't even there. Maybe he's just bored.

But then again, maybe it's not boredom at all, maybe it's just the familiarity of home as a "safe" place to test things out. And I get that. I know that's necessary and good. But man, I sure wish I didn't have to say "no" so much.

NOT ME Monday

2010-07-26T07:31:00.000-07:00

Not Me Monday is a blog carnival that was started by THIS (very pregnant) blogger. I think it's hilarious, and if you do too then you should join me in this guilt relieving practice - it's cathartic.

First things first - I did NOT spend the very first of my waking moments bathing a toddler with poop caked to the insides of his legs and around his middle. I did not follow that up by emptying his sleep sack (which certainly did not lead me to believe he had been literally swimming in poo). Knowing these things happen, I did not run out spray-&-wash attempting to clean the 85 million things that were covered in feces - I plan better than that and always have a spare bottle on hand for such events.

Knowing that my son was getting cranky, and would not particularly enjoy his evening bath, I did not suggest that his father bathe with him. No. It would be inconsiderate of me to ask my wonderful husband to get all wet in a tub filled with 2 inches of tepid water just so I wouldn't have to deal with a whiney 14 month old. I'm certainly not that inconsiderate.

I did not let Levi play in guacamole last night at chipotle. Enough said.

While attending the beautiful farmers' market in the Haymarket this weekend, I did not take full view of all the wonderful, brightly colored vegetables, the sweet corn, fresh tomatoes, and squashes, lettuces & asparaguses (Asparagai?) and yet come home with a bag of cookies to show for my efforts. wow. You've got to know I'm more health-minded than that. Seriously

Speaking of cookies, I did not bake a double batch of Jonathan's favorites (oatmeal-chocolate-chip-walnut) only to find my tender jaw could not handle their firm texture. I am now not lamenting over the fact that they are now truly for him - even though I made sure they were MSPI safe for ME. I'm also not bitter.

I did not realize this weekend that in the two years I've lived in this house, the basement toilet has been cleaned ONCE.... by my mother... just after Levi was born. He's one now.

Noticing that Levi was copying words we were saying to him for a few moments last night, Jonathan did not say say a word we'd rather he not repeat. Of course, Levi did not repeat said word. I did not laugh like a little girl.

Aaaaand I'm sure there are many more, but enough about me. What have you NOT done this week?

My picky toddler - among other news

2010-07-23T13:25:00.000-07:00

I have come to the conclusion that "toddler" must be Greek for "picky eater" - or at least Latin for "I'm going to ignore anything that looks healthy for at least the first 125 times you put it in front of me, then I may miraculously decide I like it".

In my great wisdom, I have also discovered that if you offer your toddler a food you don't want him to eat a whole lot of because it really isn't that healthy (think chicken nuggets, hotdogs, etc) it will quickly become his FAVORITE food. You know, the food you put on his tray dead LAST, so he'll have the motivation to at least pick at something remotely nutritious.

My toddler is offered a WIDE variety of foods. In general, I offer him everything we eat. He has a bit of an odd circumstance because he's dairy and soy intolerant, so I must be careful to assure his calcium/protein/calorie/fat needs are met without using cheese, yogurt, cottage cheese, milk, tofu, etc. This limits me a little, but not all that much.

My problem (the problem of EVERY toddler mother in the UNIVERSE, I'd bet) is that one day he'll eat his whole wheat bread drenched in olive oil (gotta get that fat!) and the next he'll turn his nose up to everything but pears. It comes to my attention that this child was WAY better nourished as a 7-month-old who would eat anything I fed him from a spoon. Not so any longer. Spoons have gone the way of bibs. Do you follow?

Take heed moms of smaller babes: get that balanced diet into them while you can, because I am here to tell you that these little people develop a WILL of their own. They also develop taste preferences and (more importantly in our case) texture preferences. They do things like put food in their mouthes, chew it, and then spit it out and hand it to you.

And that is the end of my picky toddler rant.

In other news, Levi and I visited the pediatrician for the umpteenth time this year. After a 3-day fever, Levi developed a spotty rash over his face, chest & back. To make matters worse, my temp is also sky-high. Poor hubby returned home last night (after having arrived at work that day at 3:00am, mind you) to two sickies with grumpy attitudes. our WONDERFUL pediatrician (actually, she's a PA, but I much prefer her to the docs at our practice) assured me he had a normal virus. Apparently some kids break out in spots when their fever breaks. The spots mean the virus is over, and no longer transmutable.

Great news for him. The rest of the household will be in a wait-and-see mode.

So, with a fever, and a recovering toddler, I shall be off to the grocery store this afternoon. Wish me luck.

oye...

2010-07-22T17:10:00.000-07:00

Thursday, July 21st; 7:00pm

Mommy: 102.0

Baby: 102.6

Daddy: Has his hands full

Plan of attack: Motrin/tylenol+flexeril, liquids, sleep & prayer. House arrest.

aaaaaaaand I would like to personally thank the academe (of Teague and Rachael Blaske) for the kind nourishment and care they lavished upon us sickies - before we knew we were really this sick, of course.

A post in which I will be opinionated

2010-07-19T07:16:00.000-07:00

This was an issue that, at first glance, appeared completely unimportant. I gave it little thought. I shrugged my shoulders and decided that my mind and energy would be better focused elsewhere, like on the determination of what vaccines I would give my child, what dairy substitute we would use (Hy-Vee rice milk won, in case you were wondering) and what if any vitamin supplement we'd give him. All, if you'll notice, pertaining to Levi's health.

It was not until his first birthday that I was faced with a seemingly simple decision: whether to keep him rear-facing in his car seat or turn him around to finally face forwards. Of course I'd turn him around. It was a rite of passage. It was an honor due him at his ripe old age of one. He'd surely enjoy the car more, be easier to entertain, and certainly easier to see in my rear-view mirror. Without a doubt I'd turn him around. The law states that at 20lbs and one year of age, I am perfectly allowed to do so. So I will. And I did.

Once.

Over his birthday weekend I had to swap the carseat into hubby's compact car because or Forester was full of lumber and drywall. He would fit rear facing (RF) in the Geo, but not comfortably, so I turned him around for our quick trip to the store. I was just certain he loved it. Who wouldn't after looking out the back window and seeing the world fly by for a year.

That afternoon at Levi's birthday party a number of mothers began talking to me about the benefits of a RF carseat. I brushed it off. Remember in the past how I've talked about our own need to "protect our own experiences", our own choices? This was one of those circumstances. In my effort to protect the decision I'd made, to prove to myself that I'd made the right one, I ignored them.

But as the night wore on I became more and more unsure of what I though was a rite of passage. While doing a little research the next morning I came to the following discoveries, the collection of which convinced me that keeping Levi in RF position was not only to be my decision, but also part of my duty to responsibly protect him.

Motor vehicle injuries are the number one leading cause of death in children under age 14
When a child is in a forward-facing seat, there is stress put on the child's neck, which must hold the head back. The mass of the head of a small child is about 25% of the body mass whereas the mass of the adult head is only 6%
Spinal cord injury, one of the most common injuries sustained by forward facing children in harness restraints, can cause temporary or life-long paralysis, or death.

Of course, all of this is null and void if the car seat in question is not properly installed. It would be better to have a child properly restrained in a forward facing position, than to have them improperly restrained in either position. Would you believe that a full 72% of car seats are improperly installed? Furthermore, would you believe that not all car seats fit in all cars? More important than the direction the child is facing, is most certainly the correct fit and installation of both the seat into the car, and the child into the seat.

But back to my quandary. When faced with what one mother told me ("the direction the child faces can be the difference between whip lash, and a broken spinal cord after a head-on collision," The most common type of collision, accounting for 96%) I couldn't put my son's perceived desires above my responsibility to protect him any longer. If I watch him like a hawk in the bathtub (drowning is the 2nd leading cause of death among children), and cut his food into bits so he doesn't choke; if I lock up the household cleaners, and store medications up high, why on earth would I knowingly expose him to the risk of paralysis?

Furthermore, if turning him forward is only a matter of what I assume will be his added enjoyment of car rides, what kind of parent would I show myself to be? One who diminishes safety in the name of fun? In that case, why should I require him to wear a helmet when he rides in daddy's bike trailer? The majority (85% of parents) don't make their kids wear them after all. And bike accidents are so much less common than auto collisions. Why does it even matter? I say this mostly in Jest, we all know why we make our kids wear helmets. We all have the "what if" scenarios go through our heads and they almost undoubtedly lead to a feeling of tremendous guilt on our behalf should the unthinkable happen.

So what if the unthinkable did happen?

I'm praying it won't. And I'm sure you are too. But I'm also going to keep Levi rear facing to the full capacity of his restraint - likely past his second birthday.

How to know you're a native washintonian, transplanted to Nebraska

2010-07-15T07:21:00.000-07:00

In case you have trouble identifying yourself, here are some clues:

When you see the abbreviation "NE" you think it likely means "north east"
WSU obviously stands for Washington State University (where's Wichita again?)
When someone complains about "traffic" you tell them they haven't experienced traffic unless they've sat somewhere on the 1-5 corridor between 4-6pm on a Friday, or sat on US26 between Pullman and Colfax after a home game.
You don't recognize it's raining until it's done so for at least a couple hours, or maybe a few days in a row
Humidity makes you gasp and ask the nearest person if the world is about to end
You declare that the person who designs Nebraska license plates should probably keep their day job.
You wonder when the Midwest will grow up and sprout some mountains
People chastise you, and sometimes even laugh, for the nalgene bottle you carry around with you everywhere - on it's own REI carabeaner no-less
You wonder "Who is Dorothy Lynch?" and "What is wrong with the bright red hot-dogs"?
You are amazed that there is actually a "minimum speed" posted right along side the speed limit on the interstate
You grab your family and start digging a sub-basement at the very thought of a tornado
You shop at Hy-Vee, close your eyes, and imagine you're at Safeway
You shop at Super-Saver, close your eyes, and imagine you're at Winco
You recall your parents telling you they paid more than TWICE for their home what you did for yours - and they bought theirs 20 years prior
You think there really could be a small club for Subaru Forester owners, all of whom could fit comfortably in the local highschool gym
People ask you what this "north-face" thing is all about, and why you and your husband both support them
You frequent FOUR different health-food stores and STILL cannot come up with the variety of edibles found exclusively at Trader Joes (and yet you're hopeful that the rumor about one being built 45 miles North, in Omaha, is true!!)
At times, you begin to wonder if "culture" means much more than yogurt
You DREAM of the day when Clearwire comes to the middle of the country.
You laugh under your breath when you hear what your friends back home are paying for gas - (and cars - and houses - and food...)

and last but not least (as I'm SURE I'll continue to think of these throughout the day)

You LONG for the Puget Sound, the crisp waterfront air, the Cascade mountains, to whom you bid farewell last Christmas and vowed to return the following year.

Call me a Cotton-mouth

2010-07-14T07:11:00.000-07:00

No, not the snake.

I mean literally, a cotton mouth. As in, a mouth full of cotton - or at least I was.

Yesterday I faced my arch-nemisis. The person I dislike visiting the very most. As kind as he may be, as congenial and sweet, you wouldn't think I'd have any problem with him (especially for as short a time as I've known him). But you have to understand my background with people in his position - Dentists, that is.

When I was a young kid, maybe 5 or 6, a dentist placed sealants on my teeth. Apparently sealants are supposed to keep sugars and other foods from decaying your teeth - especially in childhood. Well, they didn't work out so well for me. You see, when the sealants were removed by a new dentist they revealed numerous cavities which had been "trapped" underneath - holes like swiss cheese" I was told. This new dentist (who replaced the previous sealant-placing dentist that transfered to oral surgery) was from Finland. Upon seeing me for the first time (at age 13 I think) she informed me that I would need approximately 13 cavities filled.

I did not like her. She was rough, gruff, and didn't talk much. When she did it was very difficult to understand her. To this day I'm not entirely sure that everything she "filled" was a cavity. Never-the-less, fill them she did. That involved about 6 weeks of dental appointments, two cavities filled per week. Each one included it's one shot of Novocaine and the anxiety which precipitated and followed it.

Fast forward about 4 years and I found myself at another new dentist. We left "Dr. Yanks-a-lot" as we referred to her in our family, and settled with a great family dentist whom we still affectionately refer to as "Dr. Darrel". The unfortunate circumstances which brought me to his office were that "Dr. Yanks" had goofed on a number of my fillings and they were not effectively staying in place. Big problem. So, Darrel corrected them, gently. I would say he had to re-do no fewer than half of them. The Novocaine was just as anxious of a process as always for me, and with horrible TMJ issues throughout high school, none of it was a barrel of monkeys, but at least he talked me through it, he was understanding and empathetic.

So, with so much in my dental history I have maintained me epic fear of mouth-needles. So much so, in fact, that I demanded to be "put under" for the removal of all my wisdom teeth. All ONE of them. I was scared crapless.

When we moved to Nebraska we put off dentistry a whole year. By the time we got in for our first NE cleanings, I was pregnant and therefore ineligible for x-rays. 6 months later I was still pregnant. When Levi was born both of us skipped yet another year of dentistry, until about a month ago when I had some significant tooth pain (which ended up being referred jaw and sinus pain) and went in for x-rays. Turned out I had two obvious (yet small) cavities. Great.

I was hoping that my 3:20 Tuesday appointment would never come. I wondered if by some mighty twist of the galaxy we might actually skip Tuesday afternoon and progress right on into Wednesday. My hopes were shattered. I went into the dentist office and they injected me with not one, not two, but three doses of Novocaine, numbing my entire mouth so as to take care of both cavities (which were on separate sides of my mouth).

I know this may be small beans for some people. This might be just a walk in the park for others. But to me, dental work drudges up a veritable LIFETIME of anxiety. I shake. I tear up. I nearly pass out. And yet, I get it done. Why? well, quite obviously because if I put it off, there will simply be more work to do down the road. It's a downward spiral.

Needless to say, I take impeccable care of my teeth, but with as many fillings as I have (and, mind you, fillings don't last forever, eventually they must be re-filled) I'm pretty much set for a lifetime of annual dental appointments. like "more than just a cleaning" dental appointments.

So when I said on facebook yesterday that "I would prefer labor pains to Novocaine injection and dental work," I meant it. Labor pains are dull, not sharp. They come from your strong, muscular core, not your sensitive gum tissue. Labor pains produce a beautiful baby and come from 40 weeks of anticipation. Dental work produces an ugly filling and a place in your mouth that is no longer bone. Labor is hard, but it makes you stronger. Needles in your mouth make you numb, unable to eat, and temporarily incapable of making any normal facial expressions.

So, call me a big baby, but I would rather birth one than have needles in my mouth. Any day of the week.

Not Me Monday

2010-07-12T12:49:00.000-07:00

Happy Monday

Unlike YOU, I never do anything I end up regretting, or otherwise wishing I hadn't done. I'm completely perfect in every way (just like Mary Poppins), so it should come as no surprise to you that I did NONE of these things over the past week:

Last week I certainly did not find out that after having avoided the dentist for over a year I have two cavities. And nay, neither of them needs a crown.

I did not chastise my husband for teaching our son that a Zebra says "hee haw". I mean HONESTLY! everyone knows what Zebras actually say... right?

In my pointless attempt to encourage Levi to sleep past 6am, I most certainly did not dissallow his morning nap on Saturday. I did not also keep him up until his regular bed-time having only had a 90 minute afternoon nap. He also did not awake chipper at 6:00am on Sunday morning

I did not become embittered in my heart towards the two-year-old in the sunday school room at church when I personally wittnessed him maliciously push my sweet baby over (through the one-way glass window in the foyer). My son is a tough boy who can fend for himself and I would NEVER baby him. Nope, not me.

I did not begin to regret introducing the slide to my dear 13 month old after the umpteenth time he wanted me to lift him up and send him sliding down. I'm a patient mother, and I want nothing more than for my child to enjoy his toys to the fullest.

I did not roll my eyes as I saw my grown husband chasing my son around the house at 7:00am with a squirt bottle full of water - both of them squealing with laughter.

I did not break the needle on my sewing machine while replacing the velcro on Levi's diapers. After all, who uses cloth diapers anyway - archaic. (I did not use disposables this week to avoid the liqui-poo problems we've been having)

I did not buy 30lbs of ground turkey to take advantage of a $1/lb deal. That's WAY too much meat to buy at one time. I also was not given a bizarre look by the butcher at the point in time when I did not buy said meat.

I was not just a little thrilled this morning when Levi snuggled with me in our arm chair for 20 minutes after we got out of bed. Fully awake, and all snuggly.

I did not avoid cleaning the George Foreman (again) for over a week. Yuck. Those of you who know me, know that my kitchen is always clean. Always.

I did not become so loopy after taking HALF of the oral surgeon's recommended dose of Flexerol that I attempted to cut said (tiny) pills into quarters, leaving me with completely un-even doses. I'm far more careful than that with medication. I did not also attempt to then cut them into thirds when I found that a quarter just wasn't quite enough.

Finally, Levi has not been napping (his second of the day) for over 2 hours now . My child simply does NOT do that. All the other children we know have PERFECT sleep schedules, and mine is the only one who does anything quirky.

What have you and your family NOT been up to lately?

Sunday Morning Ramblings

2010-07-11T07:07:00.001-07:00

It isn't even Sunday afternoon yet and already I'm dreading the week to come. Well, I suppose dreading isn't the right word, but I'm certainly not looking forward to it. A week without our daddy round is a rough week indeed.

Today the man of the house left at 5:30am to go take part in this race (a duathalon) in Fremont. I suspect he'll return home around 2:00, or thereabouts. Tomorrow he'll need to be at work by 3:00am to meet the milk truck and spend the rest of the day making cheese. Wednesday will be a repeat of Monday. Cheesemaking makes for a long week for all of us. Lots of early-to-bed, early-to-rise, lots of whining from a toddler who gets bored of his mother after 12 hours of playing what-shall-we-do-next, and lots of chores put-off, dishes & laundry building up. Lots of stress. For everyone. But in the midst of it all, we are quite aware that we are not among the many in our country to whom unemployment benefits were recently NOT renewed. So I shall keep my lip buttoned and pull myself up by my bootstraps. Or, as my mother put it, I will "dig down" and trudge through.

Yesterday (before the reality of the week ahead became clear to us, around 5:00pm) was lovely. I made the decision to experimentally withold Levi's first nap in hopes that he would take a longer second nap (which he did not, he took a normal 90 min. nap which started and ended WAY earlier than usual) and potentially sleep in later this mjorning (which he most certainly did not) Never-the-less, He was mostly cheerful until dinner time. We went to the farmers market, got cookies at the Cookie Co., built towers out of pots and pans, and soaked ourselves at Trego Park Sprayground...

...which brings me to my story of the day. So I'm sitting at the park, on the ground away from the water. My husband is running around chasing our toddler. A woman sets up camp beside me with about 5 kids. Maybe 6 (all between 2 & 9 years of age). She looks to be their grandmother, but how am I to know? She looks a bit disorganized, appears to be frustrated with some of the children, and basically sets them loose. One is in a stroller. After a moment she comes over to me and says "say mam, could I please borrow a diaper?", Sure. No problem. And then she goes on to tell me (unsolicited, I assure you) that the father of two of the children was murdered, which is why she has custody of them. She's fostering two other children, and the final two were in the custody of their grandparents until they died recently. Sheesh! this woman has her hands FULL! No wonder she's a bit discombobulated.

But that's not all. Then another woman approaches me and asks me if I wouldn't mind keeping an eye on her two grandchildren while she ran to her car to "get some drinks". Sure, no problem. I have to admit, for a few moments there I wondered if she was actually going to return. It's amazing how many generalizations I so quickly make based on a person's appearance, or apparent social status. But, after what seemed like an unrealistically long time (for the stated trip to the car) Grandma returned. She parked herself on a bench all the way across the playground from me, but 10 minutes later she came back over, 7-up in hand. "Here", she said, "this is for keeping an eye on my grandkids." and, probably because the look on my face was one of surprise, she added "it's unopened." I was quick to thank her.

It becomes more and more obvious to me every day that Jonathan and I lead privileged lives. My own social construct is such that I pass quickly judgement upon those who seem to be "lesser," (i.e. less educated, less socially aware, less sophisticated etc.) When in reality, they just have less (less money, less opportunity, less positive influence, etc.) When will I ever learn? I am a work in progress, that is to be sure.

And now Levi is down for the morning nap that I deprived him of yesterday (because honestly, I REALLY needed some quiet time, knowing there will be precious little of it in the weeks to come). The saga of the loose poop continues, in case you were curious. I feel like we've regressed to the point we were at before he started solid food (mucus and all), but that's probably a touch more than you wanted to know. It's just frustrating. And messy. And maybe that's why it bothers me so much. That, and the fact that I can't "figure it out". I hate it when I can't make sense of things. I may consider putting him in disposables (gasp!) for the coming week or so to save my sanity while Hubby is oh-so-busy and I temporarily become the two-in-one parent from dawn to dusk.

Sigh.

I should share, though, that my I have seen a HUGE improvement in my jaw since I started doing the exercises the oral surgeon gave me, and also started taking the flexerol (a quarter of his recomended dose). Big PTL there. I mean, I'm not entering a jerky eating contest or anything, but at least bread and salad are back on the menu and I can take a break from smoothies and steamed broccoli.

Enjoy your weekend, friends. And may the next one come quickly!

Ang

2010-07-09T07:00:00.000-07:00

Does the title explain it?

If not, maybe the photo will.

My husband had been eyeballing "The Last Airbender" ever since seeing the first trailer a few months ago. Knowing that our son would not sit quietly through a movie (insert laugh of extreme understatement here) I sent him off to watch the movie, in the theater, alone.

This concept is not foreign to us. Remember, Jonathan sent me off to see the film "babies" alone. Contrary to my suspision, I thoroughly enjoyed myself. Peace and quiet. Ahhhh.

So off went my hubby to see what he imagined would be something hundreds of times better than the cartoon we had watched while babysitting the Moore's youngins. So was it? well, you'll really have to ask him, but the impression that I got was that it was a decent movie that lived up to his expectations. It didn't exceed them, but at least it met them.

That night, I cut Jonathan's hair. I offered to let him keep it this way, but he politely declined. Hey, who wouldn't want to be married to an Air Bender? I mean really.

I have come to realize that it is difficult to type (let alone think) while listening to a toddler crying over the monitor - a toddler who is increasingly trying to forgo this morning nap business. As "morning nap" (maybe I should re-name that, "morning crib time", nap suggests quiet, which it is not) shortens, so do my blogs. Funny how that works.

- M

(blank)-ula

2010-07-08T07:07:00.000-07:00

This is my newest dollar store find.

And what do you think we use this is for?

Under the influence

2010-07-07T07:21:00.000-07:00

I will take a moment hear to briefly explain my appointment with the oral surgeon yesterday, but I must prefacec this by saying that he perscribed me a muscle relaxant that has not worn off yet. I took half (yes HALF) of the recommended dose last night because I have a track record for being very sensitive to medications which may make one drowsy. Needless to say, I'm drowsy. And I took that HALF pill last night at 8:30pm.

(when I first went into labor my MW gave me an ambien pill because I needed rest and hard labor was FAR off. She sent me home. The nurse told me to take the pill there in the hospital and then to make my way home - hubby driving of course. I warned her that when I've taken ambien the past I've only been able to take HALF a pill, because a whole will make me hallucinate. She said it would be fine. Silly me, I believed her. Before I even got down the elevator I was walking like a drunk. A pregnant drunk. My husband was actually asked if I needed a wheelchair. Contracting, drunk looking, overdue woman . But man, did I have the best 4 hours of sleep of my LIFE.)

So, went to the oral surgeon. He said that with physical therapy for my jaw (i.e. exercises he gave me) and this daily muscle relaxer, my jaw could return to normal. Essentialy there's a protective miniscus which sits between the two jaw bones, and mine is out of place, allowing the two jaw bones to rub together. Ouch. It also sits in the way, which keeps my jaw from opening to its full capacity.

I've got double vision. So, I'm going to stop there.

Stay tuned. More to come.